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All the best,
- Aife
I’ve been wondering lately if it would be right to go back and see my GP about my mental health even though I’m having counselling? I wanted to get their proper opinion on a diagnosis since they just gave me their thoughts when I went to see them initially. Just to tie up loose ends/ get peace of mind I guess? It doesn’t bother me as such that I haven’t been diagnosed (apparently it’s really difficult to get a diagnosis) but I think it makes it easier to access support, especially when it’s tailored to particular conditions.
I wasn’t sure if that would be a waste of their time since there’s nothing actually wrong with me, or how to actually broach the subject to them since it’s been several months since I discussed my mental health with them. I was going to wait a few more months before going anyway so that I would be going after having 6 months of counselling.
Thoughts?
Pumpkin
I think that's absolutely the right thing to do
- Lucy :rainbow:
You could explain to them that knowing roughly what is wrong/a diagnosis, would be helpful to know for you so you know exactly what is wrong and pin point it out to help you. As I think many people find that some comfort
Hope everyone’s doing well, especially if you’re sitting exams like me! Just had to take a break from studying right now because I’m preoccupied (again) :
I feel like my mum doesn’t really understand my mental health problems, and it’s putting me off talking about them with her because sometimes I get the impression that she doesn’t want to discuss them, like she’ll turn the TV on or find an excuse to leave the room or just say she knows she can’t do anything or that we go round in circles when we discuss it. I totally respect that she’s not going through this so she might not fully understand it, but it seems to me like she doesn’t get that I don’t choose to be negative about myself or not have much self confidence. She always goes on about how it’s so draining, which I get, but it upsets me when she says it to my face, and make me constantly worry that I’ve done something wrong. She was the one who told me not to bottle things up in the first place!
Now she’s started asking me why I don’t tell her what my counsellor and I discuss in our weekly sessions without explaining why she wants to know, and even though I’ve been having counselling for months. She won’t listen when I say it’s a lot to relay back to her and it’s not easy to talk about some of it a lot (even though she knows how I feel.)
Now I think she’s annoyed with me, which doesn’t help, it just makes me angry with myself and puts me off studying.
Thoughts?
Pumpkin
So shes dismisses when you try to start the conversation about your mental health but gets annoyed when you dont tell her what your counsellor & you talk about? Thats a bit confusing
Good luck with your exams!!
Yeah I know it’s confusing, but she worries a lot about everything so she can be like that sometimes. We talked about this earlier, she isn’t really sure what to say because she “knows it’ll be wrong” but I told her that wasn’t true, I only dismiss what she says if I’m not feeling my best (and not intentionally.)
She wants me to sit down with her and my dad and discuss exactly what is affecting me in terms of my mental health, which I will try to do, but it’s not easy for me personally to talk about it to people who don’t really understand, and my dad will probably just worry even more about suicide (some of his relatives have sadly taken their own lives) no matter how many times I tell him I’m not suicidal. I’ll try my best though.
Pumpkin
Glad to hear youre not suicidal:)
Also maybe reassure your mum that she doesnt need to “aviod ‘saying wrong thing’” but simply listening and hearing you -can help and being there?
Have you had that discussion yet?
Hope youre doing okay
Hi Pumpkin,
Talking to your parents is not easy, but isn't as scary as you think! The key is to explain it in a way that they can understand, and be ready to answer plenty of questions, because they'll be likely to have some in order to understand what you're going through. Being open and honest is much better than hiding things away and letting them explode later onx
Much love
I did talk to my parents earlier, mainly my dad since I haven’t really explained it a lot to him because he doesn’t understand mental health challenges that much and he works a lot so we don’t always have time to talk. Plus, I find it difficult to talk to people who may not understand it in case I don’t describe it well enough (or I’m worried about the response I’ll get.)
He didn’t really understand it, he thinks it’s a choice to feel the way I do and be constantly negative, and started talking about something completely unrelated, but I guess it’s a start and I can build on that.
Pumpkin
Its great that you did decide to talk to your dad about the way which you are feeling and I understand that it can be hard to try and explain a situation when its not clear for ourselves.
It sounds like a good idea that you have decided together that your going to talk to each other more so that you are able to help each other out. Has he got any other support or would you be able to direct him to some more support?
How are you feeling at the moment?
Rayofhope:rainbow::rainbow2:
Thanks for your support, I’ll definitely feel more at ease talking to him about my mental health now. The only other support he’s really got is my mum, but it just worries her a lot. I told him if things get really bad and he feels his mental health is suffering to go to the doctor, but I’m not sure if he would, he doesn’t like going there or admitting that something is wrong with him.
Pumpkin
Its great that you feel that you are able to feel more at ease and you are able to open up and talk about how your feeling. You have done a great job at letting him know that he can go to the doctors. Well done.
Rayofhope:rainbow::rainbow2:
So I posted a while ago about going back to see my GP to update them about my mental health situation/possibly gather their thoughts on a diagnosis again, but was worried about wasting their time. I made an appointment, which is in a few weeks, so could anyone give me guidance on what to say in order to not sound like I’m wasting their time? I was going to write down everything I experience/symptoms to give to them.
Hugs,
Pumpkin
No worries - I hope that exams have gone well!
About the GP, it's important to know that you won't be wasting their time, since they do have some training in mental health. Anyways, this is something that will help you recover, and that investment of time is not a waste either! I think that writing things down is a great idea - it helps to clarify and consolidate your thoughts. This sounds a bit like interview advice, but having an example to draw on gives more credibility to what you say. The official guidance on mental illness diagnosis requires that you are unable to live your daily life functionally due to your mental illness, so be sure to state how these symptoms/events prevent you from living your daily life functionally!x
Much love
Just to say I had that appointment with my GP yesterday, it went well, as you know I wanted to get a bit more of their insight into a diagnosis, as they said in a previous appointment it could be depression. They said yesterday it could also be aspects of my personality manifesting as depression symptoms (if that makes sense, they did explain it.)
Anyways, they told me to just keep going with weekly counselling and to come back in about 3 months, as they thought it would be good for me to check in with them every few months or so just for them to see how I’m getting on mental health-wise, which I’m happy with.
Thanks for all your continued support, I do apologise for seeming like I’m not being supportive to you when you post, I just don’t think I give great advice or what I want to say has already been said!
Pumpkin
Counselling’s going pretty well I think, I’ve definitely noticed some changes in the 6 months I’ve been having it for, for example I’m less negative about myself and the voice in my head isn’t as strong and frequent as it was. My parents have also noticed that I’m less negative and less argumentative as well.
Pumpkin
Speaking of which, I don’t think I’ve been getting that much out of my counsellor now that I really think about it, we don’t physically do a lot of things (some have been left half finished even though I’ve mentioned them) and we don’t even seem to talk about what I’m going through in our sessions as much as we used to. I’ve tried mentioning things but we never discuss them for long.
Today was bad, I was having a nice day out with my mum but I was tense and on the edge and I snapped and took everything out on her over something silly (which made the voices even stronger) and I just broke down.
I’ve had “blips” like this before but they’ve never lasted more than a day or two and I’ve never had such strong feelings of not being able to cope. My parents have no idea what to say or do so they just feel hopeless and useless.
I’m trying to overcome this, I really am but nothing’s working. My mum suggested I should go back and see my GP (then admitted she just said it “for something to say”) but what else could they do apart from putting me on a mile long waiting list or giving me medication (which I really really don’t want)?
Sorry, I know this was a lot but I just needed somewhere to get everything out.
Pumpkin
I’m feeling quite a bit better thanks, the voice in my head isn’t as strong and I’m able to try to fight it again (which I can’t when I’m feeling low.) I’m also not as tense and argumentative as I was, but still taking everything slowly and trying to relax.
I’ve seen my counsellor since my last post and discussed with them that I feel like I should be doing more rather than mainly talking, so they gave me the next part of a task I started ages ago and said they’d look into others. I didn’t go back to see my GP since I wasn’t really thinking straight in terms of other things they could do to help.
I do have a few friends I can talk to because they understand but they have their own problems and lives and I don’t like to feel like I’m burdening them with my issues all the time. Plus, most of them are on holiday right now anyway so I’d feel rude to bother them.
My mum suggested trying an alternative therapy like acupuncture as well as counselling, but I have no idea if that would even help, and I said I was happy with counselling right now.
Thanks again.
Pumpkin