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Thank you for your support
Parents were asking lots of questions and obviously upset but they said it's down to me to tell them more and they want to support me etc.
Thanks you Raich.
I'm just feeling very scared, as I mentioned get connected phoned the emergency services on me last night. I didn't think they would be able to as I live in scotland and they are based in england to be honest, how wrong I was
The ambulance service phoned me and I was speaking to mh team at same time so I tried to tell them that, they didn't tell me they were going to send the police
Expecting a phone call or visit from someone from the mh team today- scared
Hi mike thanks for your reply!
Parents know everything now after the police came to my house
Uni has been going okayish, it's only first year so hasn't been as demanding as it will get, but I've made deadlines etc.
You're welcome.It sounds like your parents are extremely supportive and are there for you more now Hun and you're so lucky that is the case for you now in terms of your parents.I'm pleased to hear that.
I can see you feel scared about a visit from the team today but remember-They're there to help you
Hey,
How has it been with your parents today? Did you have a visit from someone from the CMHT today Hun?
I'm glad you're feeling a little bit better now though, that's good to hear.
Yes, they do care. It will take time but you can do this.
Hannah xx
Parents are supportive, just a bit worried about me being alone when they are at work, but I told them I'll be okay and I mean it!
Nobody contacted me which is weird cause the police said they would, but I'll be seeing psychologist on Thursday anyways. I'll have to tell her (she will probably know as I was in contact with out of hours CPN before and was on phone when police came, so the nurse was talking to the police too
Thanks xx
Hey Amanda,
your parents certainly sound supportive and understanding though it is understandable they feel worried about you.
How are you feeling about Thursday?
In terms of your assessment,it may help them sort help and treatment out quicker for you.
Always here xx
Just found out dad stayed off work today and mums took a holiday a rest of the week, as they are worried about me and want to be there. Dad said I can still do what I like just means he is there in the house if I need to chat. Went to uni to study today. Also got a call from a social worker today to see how things are, it was protocol and she's happy to leave it at that.
Being more open with my parents but it's challenging and nervous about the week ahead.
Feeling sad right now, not sure why
It's understandable and natural you feel nervous about how Thursday will go for you, Hun, you are being so brave and so courageous in even considering for the psychologist to speak to your mum and it is a very mature and responsible thing as well. In general, what is the relationship like between you and your mum?
It's great and so lovely that your parents are being as supportive and as understanding etc as what they are-You are very lucky indeed to have those kind of parents.
Here for you x
Things are tough at home, mums struggling because I'm struggling, so much so she's seeing the doctor as she feels low (because of me). Things are awkward at home but I've been having lots of conversations with my parents and they are very supportive.
I have always struggled to confide in my parents so this is all new to me in so many ways.
Came on here now as I feel alone and low, I was supposed to meet my mentor today but she is sick. I'm in town to study but don't feel like it now but want some space from home.
My hope is that my mum understands things better (in general) after talking to the psychologist so in turn it makes things easier for me and us all at home
Hun, you are very lucky to have such supportive and understanding parents. I understand how hard things feel for you at the moment but I imagine it may make things at least a little easier with having the support of your parents there and with you. It is understandable they are feeling the way you describe but this clearly shows how much they care for you and how much they are there for you as well.
How have you ben?
Hannah x
Yeah I know,just need to get through this to get the right support! Nervous for my appointment today
How did your appointment go today?Hope it went well!
Hannah xx
Well firstly I found out the reason why things are going so slow- basically as safety is their priority and in order for the psychologist to get to know me better, she needs to know about my childhood which has been "distressing" for me in her words. I know why, it's cause last time I got in a state after a very deep conversation about my past. Also she was informed about the incident too.
She asked if she could ask my mum some questions. Well my mum came in near the end and we talked about ways to stay safe. My psychologist agreed with my mum about locking my meds away
Next week the psychologist will be asking my mum questions about my childhood, with her there.
So basically they want me to be safe and obviously since last time, they want to take things slow for that reason
It sounds as though your childhood was hard for you, as mine was for me; and due to our ages, these are still so fresh in mind, aren't they?
I'm wondering how you feel about your mum being this involved?You're very lucky to have your parents there for you in the way they are.
Hannah xx
Posting to see how you are doing now?
Hannah x
Hi Hannah,
Hope all is well with you
Haven't been on much recently as I'm so busy and adjusting to being back at uni!
I've actually had a better week last week, and my psychology appointment with my mum wasn't as bad as I thought- I met my mum at the health centre as I was coming from uni, I managed to get the receptionist to inform my psychologist that I wanted a quick chat before my mum came in! So she said she needs 5 minutes with me and we clarfied things that would be happening during the interview with my mum- it was reassuring! I told the psychologist that I may have to lie/wont tell the full truth infront of my mum, so she said we can clarify things at my next appointment. I did withold some information but was truthful about what I was comfortable with infront of my mum. I'm very nervous for next friday as I have so much to tell my psychologist, based on the questions she asked my mum last week- like I want to emphasise about the bullying and how it affected me- which my mum doesn't know about! Also about some worries I couldn't say infront of my mum!
But I need physio, as I have very tight achilles heel tendons- which is probably where all my problems come from- I broke my right foot 2 other times which I only just found out after an XRay last month. Got asked if I was atheletic or did gynastics haha- most unfit person ever!!! So probably due to how I walked as a kid!
Thats me I practically live in my local health centre now- between weekly psychology apppointments and now I will be having physio at the same place lol
That's okay, don't worry.Ah what course are you studying at uni? Do you sleep over there or is it one which is local to your home?
It's so great and you're so lucky to have had a good/better week. It sounds as though your mum is really willing to help and support you in any which way she can, so that's another positive there.
Hope you're still feeling okay.
Hannah x
Yeah I understand that, obviously i don't have a diagnosis- I just suspect it but that's something best to explore with my psychologist. I'm don't want to outright say I think I have it to her, but I'll tell her my symptoms/ experiences and she's the one to judge. Think she may be exploring that avenue I.e. With the questionnaire and fascination with the stuff from childhood. But obviously they wouldn't say anything unless certain, so I'll see how things go.
Hi Hannah,
I'm studying biomedical science and I'm staying at home (and commenting to uni). Honestly uni is the one thing that keeps me going, gets me up in the morning, keeps me busy even if I can't concentrate that day. Getting a laptop from the uni with this software called read and write gold. I've been using it on a borrowed uni laptop and found it very helpful. It's mainly for dyslexics but it's good when I'm struggling to concentrate due to thoughts or tiredness etc. and i was having a shit week but managed to at least learn something with it.
Honestly wish my parents didn't know, but I guess it was helpful at my appointment - like cause she could give the psychologist, Lauren a better insight as to what I was like as a kid and all this report stuff. I didn't tell the full truth at the appointment with my mum, but Lauren knows as I told her I might lie beforehand in front of my mum, we are going to clarify the stuff at next appointment though (on my own thankfully).
That sounds like an exciting course-Do you like it? That's good that you can still stay at your home while studying! Saves a lot of accommodation money eh? Yeah I've heard of that software and it's designed for dyslexic sufferers but a number of people with a variety of issues use these.
It's understandable and I can definitely relate to that, I really can. It certainly does sound like it was extra helpful at your appointment though and so that's good. How would it be for you if your parents did both know the full truth?
Hannah x
Yeah I love uni (within reason lol)! That's why I decided to stay at home.
Thanks for your reply Hannah x to be honest not good, mum already has lost "trust" in me for hiding stuff and for many reasons. Mums very skeptical of my psychology appointments and called it "brainwashing" yesterday. She constantly tells me "you have a choice to live, they don't" and that " I don't see why you aren't happy, you've got everything going for you"
Oh I have so much I want to tell my psychologist on Friday- I don't know where to start. I found old journals and there's stuff I feel I should tell her I forgot. Oh and I need to tell her the real truth of certain things, I couldn't say infront of my mum yesterday!!
Any tips for my appointment? x