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    JamesJames Deactivated Posts: 1,706 Extreme Poster
    Okay, well I hope it goes/went well with the CPN
    Feel free to post back with any updates :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Cpn went fine. Back to suicidal and fucking home treatment are useless! Talk to cpn in morning bye! Argh. Fgs!


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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Feel like I'm dying anxiety is fucking me about


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    JamesJames Deactivated Posts: 1,706 Extreme Poster
    Sorry to hear things are still bad BlondieLiz.
    Are you still not getting the support you need from the Home treatment team?

    Just in case you haven't seen it already, here's our article about coping with anxiety - it's got lots of tips and a video, which might be helpful.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm not under home treatment they are useless you're meant to ring them as out of hours before 9pm then crisis after all have been useless lately. I'll cope on my own and plod on best I can


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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I don't really know what to say but I just wanted to offer hugs *hug* Hang in there, you're stronger than you think x
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thank you butterfly :) sending hugs back xx


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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    When everyone hates you. Great.


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    *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    BlondieLiz wrote: »
    When everyone hates you. Great.


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    We don't hate you. :heart:

    Wanna talk about it ? *hug*
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Everyone hates me I know it it's so obvious.


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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I know for a fact that I don't hate you.

    How are you feeling today? *hug*
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Being ditched by all psychriasts best news ever :)


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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    BlondieLiz wrote: »
    Being ditched by all psychriasts best news ever :)

    Why?? *hug* I hope you're okay xx
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I'm goood thanks :) it's coz I find building up relationships difficult and they won't give me a chance to build one with them so can't have any instead suits me :)


    Hope you're ok


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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Not sure in this recovery shit no one in cmht tells you anything they talk behind your back so much for being included in your own care!


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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey Liz, just checking in to see how you are doing? Hope you're okay *hug*
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hi butterfly, I'm doing ok thank you, plodding on with recovery, appts after appts in hope they're worth it a job load more medication which is overwhelming but trying to cope with it all.


    Thanks for asking hope all is well with you xx


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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Struggling :(


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    *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    Do you want to talk about it?

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    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Voices dates overdosing death ugh


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    *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    sending you *hug*s

    could you contact anybody to talk to, and be with you to keep your safe? :heart:
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Might be going up a&e tonight if I can't keep safe home treatment tomorrow apparently if they don't forget me again


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    *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    :heart:

    here for you if you need a chat, hopefully you can stay safe, *hug*
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thank you x


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    *BananaMonkey**BananaMonkey* Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    It's okay.
    " And everywhere I am, there you'll be, your love made me make it through, oh I owe so much to you "
    " So I say thank you for the music, the songs I'm singing, thanks for all the joy they're bringing, who can live without it, I ask in all honestly what would life be? Without a song or a dance, what are we? So I say thank you for the music, for giving it to me "
    '' It's a beautiful day and I can't stop myself from smiling "
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yay home treatment didn't forget me but Bella wasn't having anything and wouldn't let me talk so that was a fail of a visit!! I want my cpn I can trust her I think just worried of her reaction of my plans and date. I want her to do something to keep me safe when the date comes but I'm scared of the what ifs.... Any hospital experiences people can share?!


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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    BlondieLiz wrote: »
    Yay home treatment didn't forget me but Bella wasn't having anything and wouldn't let me talk so that was a fail of a visit!! I want my cpn I can trust her I think just worried of her reaction of my plans and date. I want her to do something to keep me safe when the date comes but I'm scared of the what ifs.... Any hospital experiences people can share?!

    It's great to see you posting on the boards and I am glad you have somewhere that you can be real. Sorry Bella got in the way a bit of your appt with home treatment. Could you maybe put her in her room next time for a short while as that would give you some space to chat to people without her being in the way? You sound frustrated that it was a 'fail of a visit' so it's just a thought. When do you next see your CPN? I think it'd be really positive if you could chat to her about dates and plans, it'd help her support you in the best way possible. Your safety any time is key, but especially around difficult times for you. I know you have a good relationship with her - this should make it a little easier for you. The more she knows, the more she can put in place to keep you safe when the date comes. What ifs are scary and it's totally understandable that you're worried. Try to relax a bit more, and cross bridges when you have to. That way, you're not stressing out for no reason as I know most of the time I worry it's for no reason in the end! Easier said than done though I know. I had a short time spent in a psychiatric hospital a good few summers ago now back in 2010. It was a very short time but what I needed at the time I guess. It was a time where I could be kept a very close eye on and a place of safety (to an extent). It gave me a kick up the arse to fight for recovery for sure. Maybe it's worth talking to your CPN about hospital and other things that are on your mind? She will have a depth of knowledge (professionally) and she's someone you have a good relationship (trusting which is vital) with and she seems to be very helpful for you so far. Let us know how you are anyway - we are always here for you. As Jo said, we won't forget about you *hugs*
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Feel like a piece of shit and no one seems to understand :( I hate fucking flashbacks just fuck off and do one!


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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    How are you doing tonight, Liz? *hug* :heart:
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