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Breakup

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Comments

  • LolaPumpkin13LolaPumpkin13 Posts: 475 Listening Ear

    Nobody is helping me and I’m conastly feeling sick

  • SabahSabah Community Manager Posts: 73 Budding Regular

    Hi @LolaPumpkin13 , I'm hearing how much you're struggling and that you've been dealing with this for quite a while too. It takes strength to work through this, and I really appreciate how open and honest you've been here with us. I'm also hearing that you're frustrated with the level of support you're receiving. I'm wondering, what kind of support are you looking for? You say you want to 'move on' and want to 'know what all of it means', what kind of support do you think will help put you on that path to getting those answers? You absolutely do deserve support.

  • LolaPumpkin13LolaPumpkin13 Posts: 475 Listening Ear

    I just want to know what any of it means

  • LolaPumpkin13LolaPumpkin13 Posts: 475 Listening Ear

    I want to know what any means of like I’ve to work still with others

  • SabahSabah Community Manager Posts: 73 Budding Regular

    @LolaPumpkin13 am I right in thinking that you are trying to find meaning in your break up? I apologise if I've misunderstood what you wrote. We're here for you if you'd like to share more about what kind of support you think would help you.

  • LolaPumpkin13LolaPumpkin13 Posts: 475 Listening Ear

    I just want to understand why I had the thoughts like going out sleeping with other people that I didn’t love him anymore thoughts of cheating I don’t want to go through it again

  • CallumCallum Community Manager Posts: 256 The Mix Regular

    @LolaPumpkin13 It makes sense you want to understand where those thoughts come from and what led to you having them. I'm wondering when you first started to experience those thoughts?

  • LolaPumpkin13LolaPumpkin13 Posts: 475 Listening Ear

    Not long after I moved into the new flat

  • LolaPumpkin13LolaPumpkin13 Posts: 475 Listening Ear

    when all i asked for help and all i get told is distract myself I can’t take it anymore I have panic attacks everyday

  • LolaPumpkin13LolaPumpkin13 Posts: 475 Listening Ear

    Multiple things happened and nothing

  • AzzimanAzziman Discussion Boards Moderator Posts: 2,541 Boards Guru

    @LolaPumpkin13 I'm sorry to hear that you asked for help and that you were simply told to distract yourself - you deserve to be heard and your emotions are valid. I hear that you're experiencing panic attacks - how often are they happening, and when do they happen in the day? We're here to support you.

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  • LolaPumpkin13LolaPumpkin13 Posts: 475 Listening Ear

    I’m just absolutely drained and everytime I think about the thoughts or if I think of what happened in our relationship and I just feel sick and I just heaving

  • LolaPumpkin13LolaPumpkin13 Posts: 475 Listening Ear

    I’m absolutely fed up tbh

  • Sian321Sian321 Community Manager Posts: 3,715 Community Veteran

    Hi @LolaPumpkin13 , I hear you. It sounds so, so distressing, and I really hear the impact this is having on your mind and your body. Feeling sick to your stomach sounds so overwhelming. Can I ask, what kind of people are you coming into contact with each week? I remember you said you live with your mum, is that right? Outside of your mum, who else do you come into contact with each week and whereabouts?

  • LolaPumpkin13LolaPumpkin13 Posts: 475 Listening Ear

    I don’t see anyone unless people I work with or my instructor or my psychologist I just want help to understand these thoughts

  • LolaPumpkin13LolaPumpkin13 Posts: 475 Listening Ear

    So I can move on that’s all I want

  • LolaPumpkin13LolaPumpkin13 Posts: 475 Listening Ear

    I just want to get better

  • LolaPumpkin13LolaPumpkin13 Posts: 475 Listening Ear

    that’s all I want to get help and get better

  • LolaPumpkin13LolaPumpkin13 Posts: 475 Listening Ear

    I just want help that’s all I want

  • SabahSabah Community Manager Posts: 73 Budding Regular

    @LolaPumpkin13 I can see how much you want to be able to move on and understand the past. Understanding the past can be a tricky goal, and oftentimes there isn't a simple, straightforward answer as to what happened and that can make moving on feel difficult. Your mental health and wellbeing is still important though, especially as you navigate this. You've said you want help and I'm wondering, what kind of help do you feel you need in order to put you on the path towards moving on?

  • LolaPumpkin13LolaPumpkin13 Posts: 475 Listening Ear

    I just need help understanding the thoughts like why I had cheating thoughts the being single thoughts that I didn’t love him anymore

  • SabahSabah Community Manager Posts: 73 Budding Regular

    @LolaPumpkin13 those thoughts do sound quite debilitating, especially if you are feeling overwhelmed by them even now. Though the past can't be changed, and you might not get all the answers as to what happened, you do deserve support around these thoughts. I've included a link to a resource here about managing intrusive thoughts - thoughts that feel like they come out of nowhere, make you feel guilty or upset or confused as to why you are having them: https://www.lifeline.org.au/get-help/support-toolkit/techniques-and-guides/managing-intrusive-thoughts

    .

    We're here for you when you do want to share more about how you're managing these thoughts going forward.

  • LolaPumpkin13LolaPumpkin13 Posts: 475 Listening Ear

    I really don’t know all I do is watch certain tiktokers and try and get some help so I don’t know I would like to understand this thoughts

  • LolaPumpkin13LolaPumpkin13 Posts: 475 Listening Ear

    Maybe I don’t want to keep on going no one was helped me deal with these thoughts

  • SabahSabah Community Manager Posts: 73 Budding Regular

    @LolaPumpkin13 I have reached out to via DM to check in with you further. Watching tiktoks sounds like a great distraction. How are you managing these thoughts this evening?

  • LolaPumpkin13LolaPumpkin13 Posts: 475 Listening Ear

    I’ve been dealing with this for months constantly asking for help it is exhausting and no one is helping so what is the point when I wake up depressed anxious everyday

  • SabahSabah Community Manager Posts: 73 Budding Regular

    @LolaPumpkin13 Fighting for the support you deserve can be exhausting but you absolutely do deserve it. And it sounds like it's having an impact on your day to day life. I know you've reached out to a lot of services for support, and I'm wondering, what was their advice, if they gave any to help with these thoughts? Have you found any of them helpful when the thoughts get really bad?

    .

    Just to let you know, I have reached out via DM again, thank you so much for being so open and honest.

  • LolaPumpkin13LolaPumpkin13 Posts: 475 Listening Ear

    nope no advice at all except it is intrusive thoughts I just want to know what it means so I can move on I hate living like this I miss the old me

  • SabahSabah Community Manager Posts: 73 Budding Regular

    @LolaPumpkin13 It's a shame that they were not able to provide some advice about your intrusive thoughts. I do have resources on managing intrusive thoughts. If you think they'd be helpful, I could share them with you?

    .

    Can I also ask, are you safe right now?

  • LolaPumpkin13LolaPumpkin13 Posts: 475 Listening Ear

    it doesn’t matter he is gone and I’ve been called some nasty things which has affected me massively and I’m done I’m frustrated I’m angry

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