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Anybody want to vent or chat about anything? (Triggering stuff edition) w/c 15.09.25
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You can rant as much and as little as you want or need @Animalloverb we are all here to help as much or as little as you need ❤️
@Animalloverb Don't ever say sorry for talking about things mate. You've listened to every single one of us when we were struggling with things. You deserve all that support and kindness you gave to so many others right back.
There isn't anything ridiculous about going straight to Romania, but what might actually be a more cost effective solution, and might take a bit less of your time up without needing your passport would be heading to the Romanian Embassy in London. Rather than heading straight to Romania, you could discuss the situation with embassy staff in person, bonus points if she had Romanian citizenship, and you could discuss it as a case of repatriation. That might be able to make things slightly easier for you, and might make embassy staff more obliged to help.
And as long as somebody knows your situation, and is able to check in with you from time to time, even just for the seizures to make sure your not in status, is comforting to know. You're doing your best in the most horrific of situations.
Yeah I was thinking of doing that to be fair. I may have a look and go down there.
But I do actually need to get my passport sorted out anyways as I will need it to get to Romania for the funeral service anyway.
@Animalloverb it's good thinking mate, because passports can take 3 weeks to come through with the standard service, where as the embassy can be accessed with just a train or coach ticket to london, within days. So, it's the fastest option to see anybody who you need to from the romanian goverment for this all, and it's a good idea to put in for that passport at the same time, the sooner the better.
Appreciate it mate,
I will shut up now, sorry.
@Animalloverb that's completely normal and to be expected. It's not something that can be just ignored or shut away and it's okay if it hits you hard. It will take time to come to terms with and process, but every step you take, is a little more progress towards coping. It's incredibly brave of you to even be trying this, and i am incredibly proud of you.
I appreciate it mate, thank you.
@Animalloverb Nope. For one, you have nothing to be sorry about. And two, you don’t have to keep everything bottled up if you don’t want to. This is your space too. You’re sharing something incredibly heavy that’s weighing on you, and as your friend I’m here to listen mate. I'm here whenever you want to talk, like you've been here for me, and everybody else.
I appreciate it so much mate, but honestly I do have to bottle everything up, I can't be sharing this crap.
It's my life, so it's my crap to deal with, I can't be weighing it onto other people as that isn't right.
And I have a job to do, I can't be having all these problems when I am meant to be showing up for people.
@Animalloverb the thing is mate, you've been there for so many others when they've shared there problems and struggles. And each time, you help them as best you can, and that means the world to so many people. You deserve to be able to lean on others for support too and to have people listen to you in your hour of need. I completely respect your decision, but i need to make this point clear. You aren't a burden on anybody for talking about this stuff and venting to them. You're getting the same kindness that you show to so many others.
I really appreciate that mate.
My head has just been really messed up with everything at the moment, and knowing I have nobody I can go to about anything, it's been that way for ages so I have been so used to just getting by on my own and keeping things to myself and showing up for others even if I am living through what feels like hell.
So opening up on here and stuff is just a really new thing to me as I have never been able to speak about anything at all before.
@Animalloverb i think i know what you mean. It sounds a bit like what we call caregivers syndrome, where you've been supporting others for such a long time, and haven't really have much chance to give yourself that same kindness. And it can make it difficult to open up anywhere given you've not been able to for ages. You've been carrying so much on your shoulders for so long, so it's going to be tricky starting to get comfortable enough to open up about these things, and it's never done overnight, but you're already making such huge amounts of progress, and it's important to stop and look at how far you've come with it. Just by talking on here, that alone shows just how strong you are. I just want to add, you'll always have friends here bro, and you'll never be without someone to talk to.
@Redemption just surviving as usual mate. how about you?
Not too bad thanks and sorry wrong thread @DonnerKebab
I appreciate it.
There is never a chance for a break from anything, It's fine but gosh it really does get tricky at times. I can't keep doing everything at once. I have so much to do, and so much to sort out, as well as living with stuff that has already happened.
I am still fighting to sort out my fiancé's funeral, I am going to speak to someone in person on Monday as that's the only free time I have right now to be able to get the train down.
But at the same time, I have this 2 year old child I am trying to sort something out for, I am not letting this kid go into the system, my only other option is to basically spend any little time I can find so I can fight to get parental rights so the kid can live with me, I know it is going to be an incredibly difficult battle and it's one of the last things that I need right now.
Hi @eylah thank you for checking in, in all honesty I’m masking a lot of how I’m feeling and how I’m doing just trying to get through each day which just gets harder but it’s fine.
I’m still thinking about ho spoke to my gp and what made them put my meds down to weekly instead of monthly
Had to hide my sh from my bf last night and will have to again tonight.
I’m losing someone I’m close to at work (my AGM) as he’s moving locations, like he said I can still message him and I won’t loose contact but it’s just seems to be more change and I don’t like it.
But yeah just trying to survive.
How are you doing?
I know it isn't the kids fault, I am probably putting this extra work onto myself but there is just no way I am letting a child that young go into the system, they deserve so much more than that.
I have no idea if I would even be able to be a good parent, and I wi be getting judged by so many other people too.
I wonder if you've felt able to speak with anyone else about the situation so far? For example, whether there might be services such as the NSPCC or Childline that might be able to offer you some advice? The Citizens Advice Bureau could be another space to reach out to for advice around practicalities also.
When you say you're concerned about getting judged by so many other people, that sounds extremely tough. Particularly when you're trying to do all you can to support this child. Again, it sounds like a lot of pressure and responsibility you're holding right now. What do you imagine people's judgements might be? Are there any people in particular you're afraid would judge you?
We're here with you to listen and support you emotionally. Thank you so much for sharing what you have.