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tw - suicide attempt

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  • toffuna101toffuna101 Posts: 2,985 Boards Guru
    DonnerKebab wrote: »
    toffuna101 wrote: »
    eylah wrote: »
    you’re apart of the family @toffuna101 we always here for one another including you!! we don’t want you to suffer <3 we want you happy and to feel safe and happy.

    thats good. i feel like i belong here.

    @toffuna101 you always belong here, and you always will. We care for you deeply. You are a gem of a person, and a brave one as well. Remember, bravery isn't about not being scared, it's about being scared but still pushing through in the face of that fear and worry. And reaching out for help must have been terrifying, but you did it anyway. That is bravery, never forget that. <3

    thank you. i recognise that i am brave now
  • eylaheylah Posts: 8,240 Legendary Poster
    DonnerKebab wrote: »
    toffuna101 wrote: »
    eylah wrote: »
    you’re apart of the family @toffuna101 we always here for one another including you!! we don’t want you to suffer <3 we want you happy and to feel safe and happy.

    thats good. i feel like i belong here.

    @toffuna101 you always belong here, and you always will. We care for you deeply. You are a gem of a person, and a brave one as well. Remember, bravery isn't about not being scared, it's about being scared but still pushing through in the face of that fear and worry. And reaching out for help must have been terrifying, but you did it anyway. That is bravery, never forget that. <3

    totally agree ^
    toffuna101 wrote: »
    eylah wrote: »
    i certainly care so much abt you <3 how are you doing now? how is everything? are you able to breathe okay etc? sounds silly but just making sure!

    i can breathe ok. im trying to distract myself by listening to music. the bad thoughts keep coming to me but the music is helping.

    keep talking to me and nathan if you want? <3 we are here! im staying up all night so i know you’re safe and well <3
    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • toffuna101toffuna101 Posts: 2,985 Boards Guru
    eylah wrote: »
    DonnerKebab wrote: »
    toffuna101 wrote: »
    eylah wrote: »
    you’re apart of the family @toffuna101 we always here for one another including you!! we don’t want you to suffer <3 we want you happy and to feel safe and happy.

    thats good. i feel like i belong here.

    @toffuna101 you always belong here, and you always will. We care for you deeply. You are a gem of a person, and a brave one as well. Remember, bravery isn't about not being scared, it's about being scared but still pushing through in the face of that fear and worry. And reaching out for help must have been terrifying, but you did it anyway. That is bravery, never forget that. <3

    totally agree ^
    toffuna101 wrote: »
    eylah wrote: »
    i certainly care so much abt you <3 how are you doing now? how is everything? are you able to breathe okay etc? sounds silly but just making sure!

    i can breathe ok. im trying to distract myself by listening to music. the bad thoughts keep coming to me but the music is helping.

    keep talking to me and nathan if you want? <3 we are here! im staying up all night so i know you’re safe and well <3

    yeah ill keep on talking because talking helps.
  • eylaheylah Posts: 8,240 Legendary Poster
    what kind of music are you listening to? im listening to music too!
    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • toffuna101toffuna101 Posts: 2,985 Boards Guru
    im listening to Calvin Harris - Outside ft. Ellie Goulding. its such a classic song from 2017
  • eylaheylah Posts: 8,240 Legendary Poster
    omg i love that song! im listening to save you a seat by alex warren!
    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • toffuna101toffuna101 Posts: 2,985 Boards Guru
    eylah wrote: »
    omg i love that song! im listening to save you a seat by alex warren!

    that sounds like a nice song. im now gonna listen to mike posner - cooler than me
  • eylaheylah Posts: 8,240 Legendary Poster
    it’s a very sad song i always cry to it aha! oh never heard of that song before!
    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • toffuna101toffuna101 Posts: 2,985 Boards Guru
    eylah wrote: »
    it’s a very sad song i always cry to it aha! oh never heard of that song before!

    i see. well when i feel better i might check out that song. you should totally check out cooler than me, it reminds me of the 80s and 90s.
  • eylaheylah Posts: 8,240 Legendary Poster
    sry i got spam blocked <3 have they turnt up yet!
    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • toffuna101toffuna101 Posts: 2,985 Boards Guru
    eylah wrote: »
    sry i got spam blocked <3 have they turnt up yet!

    no unfortunately not. i hope they show up soon.
  • eylaheylah Posts: 8,240 Legendary Poster
    im hoping so too. depending where the childline worker is in england ( which call handler site thingy lol ) they’ll have to pass it to their ambulance service then your local ambulance service if that makes sense.
    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • toffuna101toffuna101 Posts: 2,985 Boards Guru
    eylah wrote: »
    im hoping so too. depending where the childline worker is in england ( which call handler site thingy lol ) they’ll have to pass it to their ambulance service then your local ambulance service if that makes sense.

    they could be in scotland, wales or even northern ireland if they have childline bases there. theres a good chance theyre in england though.
  • eylaheylah Posts: 8,240 Legendary Poster
    yeah sry i couldn’t think of the word! but yes that’s true. im gonna be awake all night so i can talk to you so you’re safe and well. <3
    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • toffuna101toffuna101 Posts: 2,985 Boards Guru
    eylah wrote: »
    yeah sry i couldn’t think of the word! but yes that’s true. im gonna be awake all night so i can talk to you so you’re safe and well. <3

    alright
  • toffuna101toffuna101 Posts: 2,985 Boards Guru
    im in A&E now, the ambulance took me there. im safe
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 1,386 Wise Owl
    toffuna101 wrote: »
    im in A&E now, the ambulance took me there. im safe

    @toffuna101 fantastic. Are you alone or do you have your mom or dad with you?
  • toffuna101toffuna101 Posts: 2,985 Boards Guru
    @DonnerKebab I'm alone. This is my first time being alone within a hospital
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 1,386 Wise Owl
    toffuna101 wrote: »
    @DonnerKebab I'm alone. This is my first time being alone within a hospital

    @toffuna101 i know i'm only virtual, but i'm here with you friend. You are doing a really brave thing. Does it say how long estimated wait times are?
  • toffuna101toffuna101 Posts: 2,985 Boards Guru
    @DonnerKebab no, this is my first time being in this A&E so I have no idea where everything is. I can't even find a vending machine. I havent ate in hours
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 1,386 Wise Owl
    toffuna101 wrote: »
    @DonnerKebab no, this is my first time being in this A&E so I have no idea where everything is. I can't even find a vending machine. I havent ate in hours

    @toffuna101 i had this issue once. Wandered around for like half an hour until a doctor asked if i needed help, and pointed me in the direction of the vending machine. If you ask at reception, or the nurse who walks by checking on A&E patients every half an hour, they'll be able to direct you. Though it does feel scary asking, they are actually really nice.
  • toffuna101toffuna101 Posts: 2,985 Boards Guru
    @DonnerKebab I asked someone and they said that the vending machine is out of order. There is another vending machine which is in the paediatrics area but I'd have to round and I cant be asked to go round. It's sad that I'm too old to be in paediatrics otherwise I would've gotten something from the vending machine
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 1,386 Wise Owl
    toffuna101 wrote: »
    @DonnerKebab I asked someone and they said that the vending machine is out of order. There is another vending machine which is in the paediatrics area but I'd have to round and I cant be asked to go round. It's sad that I'm too old to be in paediatrics otherwise I would've gotten something from the vending machine

    @toffuna101 i'm sorry friend. I know how much better it was when you were in the children's A&E, and how as an adult, that transition to adult A&E is tough for you. Made worse by the fact that your alone there right now. And made even worse by the fact that even the vending machine is out of order. it's like the perfect storm on top of already difficult circumstances. But you should definitely try and go around to grab a snack of some kind. You don't want to be hungry. 10 minutes now vs hours of being hungry, i know which i'd pick
  • toffuna101toffuna101 Posts: 2,985 Boards Guru
    @DonnerKebab I don't even know if I'll have breakfast at this point. This hospital looks sketchy
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 1,386 Wise Owl
    toffuna101 wrote: »
    @DonnerKebab I don't even know if I'll have breakfast at this point. This hospital looks sketchy

    @toffuna101 you can't go without the most important meal of the day. You should definitely get to that vending machine, because going hungry won't do you any favours.

    And a hospital is a hospital toffuna, no matter how sketchy looking 😂.
  • toffuna101toffuna101 Posts: 2,985 Boards Guru
    @DonnerKebab I don't know if I can since I think I'm being put on 1-to-1 observation :skull:
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 1,386 Wise Owl
    edited June 26
    toffuna101 wrote: »
    @DonnerKebab I don't know if I can since I think I'm being put on 1-to-1 observation :skull:

    @toffuna101 you might have to ask whoever has you on 1-1 observation then for them to send someone to get you a snack, or to come with you to get one
  • toffuna101toffuna101 Posts: 2,985 Boards Guru
    DonnerKebab wrote: »
    toffuna101 wrote: »
    @DonnerKebab I don't know if I can since I think I'm being put on 1-to-1 observation :skull:

    @toffuna101 you might have to ask whoever has you on 1-1 observation then for them to send someone to get you a snack, or to come with you to get one

    yeah probably. they're getting someone right now I think
  • DonnerKebabDonnerKebab Posts: 1,386 Wise Owl
    toffuna101 wrote: »
    DonnerKebab wrote: »
    toffuna101 wrote: »
    @DonnerKebab I don't know if I can since I think I'm being put on 1-to-1 observation :skull:

    @toffuna101 you might have to ask whoever has you on 1-1 observation then for them to send someone to get you a snack, or to come with you to get one

    yeah probably. they're getting someone right now I think

    @toffuna101 good. As long as you aren't alone and have somebody right now with you there, and aren't hungry or thirsty. So long as those three are true, then you can focus on getting better and getting help.

    Can i ask how it went with your mom and dad with the ambulance?
  • toffuna101toffuna101 Posts: 2,985 Boards Guru
    they weren't in the ambulance with me. and I misread the situation, I dont think I'm being put on 1-to-1 observation, I'm just being put under regular observation by one of the nurses. They're watching three people at once
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