Bully teaching assistant

Rose113 · March 17

So there’s a teaching assistant that hates my guts and I’ve never known why but usually stuff she’s done and said has been tolerable but today it wasn’t which ended me walking out of class. She full on screamed at me for no reason and yelling is a trigger so I walked out and cried to my progress coach who took me back to class and got the teaching assistant out and she lied to the progress coach so I stormed off and my progress coach followed me so I broke down crying in the bathroom to her and said I’m not coming in tmr and I left. I phoned my mum sobbing and she came to pick me up because I couldn’t stop crying so she’s calling my progress coach tomorrow to speak to her about it because even my mum knows this isn’t knew and has been going on a long time.

TheNightmare · March 17

I'm really sorry this happened to you. That teaching assistant sounds incredibly unprofessional there’s no excuse for screaming at a student imo, especially when she’s been unfair toward you for a long time. Understandable that you were shocked and upset; anyone would be in that situation. I’m glad you had your progress coach and your mum there to support you. You absolutely don’t deserve to be treated like that, and it’s good that your mum is getting involved. Take the time you need to process this, and know that you’re not in the wrong here. We're all here for you and if you need to talk I'm always a dm away.

Invisible_me · March 17

That is not on and not kind @Rose113 , no one holds vs makings you feel like thay. Well done for speaking up about it though.

sinead276 · March 18

hopefully you're feeling a bit better this morning and like the others have said, it was unfair and quite unprofessional for her to be talking to you in the way you described. you deserve to have someone supporting you and being understanding and patient, not a teaching assistant who reacted in the way they did. you should be proud of yourself for being strong enough to express how it all made you feel to your progress coach and mum. we are all here for you as always

.leyla26 · March 18

Good morning @Rose113

Gosh that truly sounds so intimidating, especially coming from someone who is meant to be there to look out for you, and it's not something you would ever deserve

You have mentioned yourself that you don't really know why she does it, but whatever her reasons are, it is not something you should need to endure when you already have a lot on your plate. It sounds like your progress coach is quite supportive and is likely to stick by your side through exploring what has happened, does that sound about right? Especially with your mum backing you up and speaking to her as well to express how distraught you were about it all (understandably!).

I hope you were able to take a few moments for yourself after being triggered like that, you deserve kindness even when other people aren't treating you with it

How do you feel about your mum getting involved and her having a chat with your progress coach about it? Please update us here if you would like to, the community is here for you as always!!

Rose113 · March 18

Sorry for letting replies build up, I don’t mean to be ungrateful for the replies I just feeling drained, sorry,

Thank you @TheNightmare @Invisible_me and @sinead276 for your kind words I appreciate it

@leyla26 my progress coach is still trying to make out that she was just being “harsh” but I don’t find screaming at a student in close to being harsh other than out of hand bullying.

Sophie messaged me this morning to say the teaching assistant isn’t in the class and that there is a different one so either she had the day of too or something

My mum said to me that she has never seen me in that much of a state before, normally if I’m upset I can shove it away until I’m home but yesterday I couldn’t even get on the bus like I was meant to

Yeah I’m hoping my mum can sort it out

TheNightmare · March 18

No problem @Rose113 here if you need anything

.leyla26 · March 18

@Rose113 If you feel that it was bullying then you have every right to call it that and we are here for you!! You felt intimidated by someone who has power and that is not okay for them to make you feel

I'm glad that you won't have to see her today, it can give you a bit of a break, how does it feel that you won't need to her again hopefully for a bit?

Go your mum! I hope she can stick up for you like you deserve, especially when she herself is saying that it is one of the worst states she has seen you in

Please let us know how it goes if you feel comfortable to!

Rose113 · March 18

@leyla26 if something has been going on for months then it is bullying right??

I don’t know

shannon_164 · March 19

hey @Rose113 🙂

i’m so sorry you’re going through this. it sounds like an incredibly tough situation, especially when you’re just trying to get through your day and someone’s behaviour is making it so much harder. it is completely understandable that yelling would be a trigger for you, and i think it was a really brave thing to walk out and seek help when you felt overwhelmed. it is good that you had someone to talk to, like your progress coach, even though it sounds like the teaching assistant’s actions are continuing to create a lot of stress.

i’m glad your mum is involved and is advocating for you, and i really hope your progress coach is able to support you and take your side in this. you deserve to feel safe and respected at college, and it’s not okay for anyone, especially a teaching assistant, to treat you in a way that causes you distress i hope that when your mum speaks to them, it helps to address the issue and brings some resolution.

you’re not alone in this, and i hope you can get the support you need to feel better about returning to class when you’re ready. you’ve got this

Bully teaching assistant

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