Support

nem · February 14

I was told I don’t really have much of a support network
Meant to be good for me to build one
Do you have tips?

Sian321 · February 15

Hey @nem , thank you for this post - that's such a great question, and I am sure that you're not alone in wanting to grow a support network.

Day-to-day, who are the people that you typically see within your average week? Maybe this includes family, friends, managers, support professionals and carers?

Is there anyone / multiple people in the circle of people who know you already who you tend to feel safe opening up to about your feelings and thoughts? Even one or two people can be the beginnings of a wider support network, helping you to feel that you don't have to cope with everything on your own

When it comes to looking for support for yourself, in an ideal world, what do you think this support would look like? E.g. would it be someone you could see in person or online? A friend to chat with, a professional mental health worker to give you advice, or maybe a counsellor to explore your feelings with? What do you feel is missing right now?

Here at The Mix we have a data-base of support services all across the UK and can share with you some further resources if helpful.

It's so positive that you're wanting to grow your support network, Nem, and that you're asking for help. Already setting up an account here on Community and posting to Boards can be a great start in finding more help and connection for yourself

nem · February 16

There’s not really anyone
I have a personal trainer
I ask about food, he helps me. Increasing my calories
I get anxiety
I met a youth group moderator man cried to him
That was something I guess
A drunk lady on the bus started talking to me then I cried

nem · February 16

There are people I guess
lol
But yeah idk

nem · February 16

Don’t have my community mental health team don’t have my psychiatrist don’t like my parents
lol
lol
They’re like my biggest triggers
I had a crazy debilitating anxiety induced stomach pain last week for over an hour it was totally debilitating - cus my mum came back from a work trip
lol
Can always call Samaritans
Yeah
I called lifeline and Samaritans when I had the stomach pain it was. Bad!

Katie · February 17

Hey @nem I'm hearing you feel like you don't have much of a stable support network is that right?

You have a personal trainer who helps you with food, and you also use Samaritans and Lifeline when you need someone to talk to. I also hear you met a youth group moderator and it sounds like you were able to open up to him a bit. Have you only met him the once or is he someone you could talk to regularly?

nem wrote: »

Don’t have my community mental health team don’t have my psychiatrist don’t like my parents

I just wanted to check what you mean here. Do you have a community mental health team and a psychiatrist?

It sounds like you have a difficult relationship with your parents who are your biggest triggers. I hear they can cause you a lot of anxiety which can physically manifest into stomach pains. It sounds like you live at home (correct me if I'm wrong here!), which seems really difficult being so close to those who trigger you. Have you found anything that helps you when you feel triggered? Even if it's just a small thing that brings you some comfort or helps ground you?

I'm also wondering the same as @Sian321 - When it comes to looking for support for yourself, in an ideal world, what do you think this support would look like? E.g. would it be someone you could see in person or online? A friend to chat with, a professional mental health worker to give you advice, or maybe a counsellor to explore your feelings with? What do you feel is missing right now?

You're doing so well opening up to us here and using our discussion boards. I hope you'll be able to feel a sense of community here

nem · February 17

Thanks
I’m not sure
I have no chill
lol
All I think about is steps really
Yeah
I’m always stressed about that
And it’s cold
But yeah being home is terrible
Used to go on loads of dates it was fun but it’s so cold now so I always look a bit shit. lol. Like I’m just wearing a million layers lol. I always get steps on dates so they’re good and also fun. But yeah weird for that now. And I worry about money

nem · February 17

I do think I was always stressed abt dates tho lol so
But think it was fun
A learning experience
I liked it

nem · February 17

But in the dates era I was always stressed about food that’s getting better
I felt sooooo shit abt my body
lol
Now I like my body

nem · February 17

But yeah being with parents is hard
Very very hard
Very very hard

nem · February 17

I think before I was ok ish but idk
I was fine for a bit
I don’t even know
I think my parents are worse now I’m not sure

My parents also keep talking to me about hospitals it’s triggering

Laura_tigger82 · February 23

We can really hear how triggered you are feeling @nem. I have just responded to your other post about hospitals but I wonder how you are doing more generally at the moment?

On this post, you have also mentioned struggling with food, money and self-image. Would you like to talk to us more about any of these things which you are struggling with?

nem · February 23

I’m ok
I’m tired cus I’m so stressed
I don’t wanna get ugly
My skin got worse
I screamed a lot at my mum
Getting a bit sick

nem · February 23

Tired

nem · February 23

Only sleep 5hrs a night I should move out i find home unbearable

Laura_tigger82 · February 23

I can really hear how you would feel tired with only 5 hours sleep a night @nem and the stress you are experiencing too. Is there something in particular which is causing you to have sleep difficulties at the moment? It sounds like stress is a big factor, especially with being at home.

In which ways is being at home currently feeling unbearable? Have you managed to talk to anyone about this? You deserve support to feel comfortable where you live. I can hear how this stress has been causing you to scream a lot too.

You have mentioned your skin has got worse and you have been getting a bit sick. Could this stress and lack of sleep be impacting your skin and causing you to get a bit sick?

nem · February 23

Yeah
Being at home makes it hard for me to sleep

nem · February 23

I always have to rush out in the morning
Never know how I’m
Getting home

Laura_tigger82 · February 23

That sounds really difficult @nem

Is there ever a plan of someone picking you up or public transport? Could you plan transport routes and times with someone?

nem · February 23

My mum only ever talks to me about medication and hospitals and how I’m sick

Laura_tigger82 · March 2

That sounds really difficult @nem

whilst that is a part of what you unfortunately have to experience, you are a whole person - and not just someone who has to take medication and go to hospitals because they are sick. You have likes, dislikes, interests, hobbies and dreams etc! as well as skills and strengths. Do you feel comfortable bringing up other topics to discuss?

Support

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