Support

nem

I was told I don’t really have much of a support network
Meant to be good for me to build one
Do you have tips?

Sian321

Hey @nem , thank you for this post - that's such a great question, and I am sure that you're not alone in wanting to grow a support network.

Day-to-day, who are the people that you typically see within your average week? Maybe this includes family, friends, managers, support professionals and carers?

Is there anyone / multiple people in the circle of people who know you already who you tend to feel safe opening up to about your feelings and thoughts? Even one or two people can be the beginnings of a wider support network, helping you to feel that you don't have to cope with everything on your own

When it comes to looking for support for yourself, in an ideal world, what do you think this support would look like? E.g. would it be someone you could see in person or online? A friend to chat with, a professional mental health worker to give you advice, or maybe a counsellor to explore your feelings with? What do you feel is missing right now?

Here at The Mix we have a data-base of support services all across the UK and can share with you some further resources if helpful.

It's so positive that you're wanting to grow your support network, Nem, and that you're asking for help. Already setting up an account here on Community and posting to Boards can be a great start in finding more help and connection for yourself

nem

There’s not really anyone
I have a personal trainer
I ask about food, he helps me. Increasing my calories
I get anxiety
I met a youth group moderator man cried to him
That was something I guess
A drunk lady on the bus started talking to me then I cried

nem

There are people I guess
lol
But yeah idk

nem

Don’t have my community mental health team don’t have my psychiatrist don’t like my parents
lol
lol
They’re like my biggest triggers
I had a crazy debilitating anxiety induced stomach pain last week for over an hour it was totally debilitating - cus my mum came back from a work trip
lol
Can always call Samaritans
Yeah
I called lifeline and Samaritans when I had the stomach pain it was. Bad!

Katie

Hey @nem I'm hearing you feel like you don't have much of a stable support network is that right?

You have a personal trainer who helps you with food, and you also use Samaritans and Lifeline when you need someone to talk to. I also hear you met a youth group moderator and it sounds like you were able to open up to him a bit. Have you only met him the once or is he someone you could talk to regularly?

nem wrote: »

Don’t have my community mental health team don’t have my psychiatrist don’t like my parents

I just wanted to check what you mean here. Do you have a community mental health team and a psychiatrist?

It sounds like you have a difficult relationship with your parents who are your biggest triggers. I hear they can cause you a lot of anxiety which can physically manifest into stomach pains. It sounds like you live at home (correct me if I'm wrong here!), which seems really difficult being so close to those who trigger you. Have you found anything that helps you when you feel triggered? Even if it's just a small thing that brings you some comfort or helps ground you?

I'm also wondering the same as @Sian321 - When it comes to looking for support for yourself, in an ideal world, what do you think this support would look like? E.g. would it be someone you could see in person or online? A friend to chat with, a professional mental health worker to give you advice, or maybe a counsellor to explore your feelings with? What do you feel is missing right now?

You're doing so well opening up to us here and using our discussion boards. I hope you'll be able to feel a sense of community here

nem

Thanks
I’m not sure
I have no chill
lol
All I think about is steps really
Yeah
I’m always stressed about that
And it’s cold
But yeah being home is terrible
Used to go on loads of dates it was fun but it’s so cold now so I always look a bit shit. lol. Like I’m just wearing a million layers lol. I always get steps on dates so they’re good and also fun. But yeah weird for that now. And I worry about money

nem

I do think I was always stressed abt dates tho lol so
But think it was fun
A learning experience
I liked it

nem

But in the dates era I was always stressed about food that’s getting better
I felt sooooo shit abt my body
lol
Now I like my body

nem

But yeah being with parents is hard
Very very hard
Very very hard

nem

I think before I was ok ish but idk
I was fine for a bit
I don’t even know
I think my parents are worse now I’m not sure

My parents also keep talking to me about hospitals it’s triggering