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(TW suicide) keeping getting job rejections makes me want to kill myself

bignosegirly0bignosegirly0 Posts: 181 Helping Hand
edited February 16 in Health & Wellbeing
Being stuck in a job where everyone hates me and I keep fucking up my reputation is stopping me from genuinely improving myself mentally.

When I’m stuck in a workplace full of rotten people, I also become a rotten miserable bitch. And the only way for me to get better is to get out of that environment and be surrounded by people who actually appreciate me. But no matter how much I try, I keep getting job rejections.
I think this is a sign from god telling me that I should kill myself.
There is no hope for me.
Post edited by Katie on

Comments

  • eylaheylah Posts: 6,594 Master Poster
    edited February 16
    are you feeling safe? if your not feeling safe pls contact a helpline or if your in danger pls contact 111 or 999. you can also txt 999 if you don’t feel like calling them. your safety matters <3 to txt 999 you have to register your phone number first. <3
    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • bignosegirly0bignosegirly0 Posts: 181 Helping Hand
    @eylah im safe at the moment. I can’t kill myself because I’m with my family.
  • eylaheylah Posts: 6,594 Master Poster
    thats rly concerning im rly worried abt you @TheMix
    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • bignosegirly0bignosegirly0 Posts: 181 Helping Hand
    @eylah im not intending to kill myself. But I’m struggling to see a better future ahead of me. But then again, I’m able to keep myself safe.
  • KatieKatie Community Manager Posts: 332 The Mix Regular
    edited February 16
    @eylah im not intending to kill myself. But I’m struggling to see a better future ahead of me. But then again, I’m able to keep myself safe.
    Hi @bignosegirly0 thank you for letting us know you're able to keep yourself safe. I also hear that you aren't intending to act on your thoughts, but you are struggling to see a better future ahead of you. We've popped you a DM to explore this a little more if that feels comfortable for you <3 You're doing so well opening up here, and these sound like really difficult feelings to be experiencing.

    The environment we spend a lot of time in, such as work environments, can really affect moods. If we're surrounded by toxicity, then sometimes it can seep into our own lives. You deserve to be doing a role you enjoy surrounded by people who appreciate you, however I can understand that getting job rejections can be pretty disheartening. Can I ask if you're applying for a range of different jobs?

    I've added a spoiler to your post - I hope that's okay. And thank you for adding the trigger warning.

    Also thank you @eylah for tagging us and looking out for our community <3

    And just to echo what Eylah said above:
    Here at the Mix we take thoughts of suicide seriously. We hear you and your feelings are important. We just wanted to let you know that if you did feel at any point that you were going to act on your thoughts of suicide, then we would urge you to call the emergency services on 999, or go to your local A&E department to explain your intentions to them, so that they can support you.

    If you're unable to call emergency services, you can also text 999. You first need to register your mobile by texting "register" to 999. Once registered, you can text the service whenever you need urgent help. You should then get a reply within two minutes either stating that help is on its way or that they need more information. If you don't hear back within 3 minutes, try again.
  • bignosegirly0bignosegirly0 Posts: 181 Helping Hand
    @Katie hiya, I’ve applied for different ranges of jobs. Graphic designer, photographer, or a crew member at cafes, restaurants, retail shops, art galleries etc.
  • Laura_tigger82Laura_tigger82 Moderator Posts: 5,423 Part of The Furniture
    It sounds positive that you are applying for a different range of jobs @bignosegirly0. How are you feeling about the job applications themselves and the interviews - do you have support with these processes at the moment?

    Also, is there a particular role you would like more than the others? We really do care about you and we hope you get the job you deserve soon, where you can feel appreciated <3
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  • eylaheylah Posts: 6,594 Master Poster
    oh sry @bignosegirly0 was just worried abt you so tagged themix i hope your ok im always here if you need anything <3
    ppl dont always need advice. sometimes all they rly need is a hand to hold. an ear to listen. and a heart to understand them. 🧸
  • bignosegirly0bignosegirly0 Posts: 181 Helping Hand
    @Laura_tigger82 im not feeling hopeful. Overall, I’ve received two interviews. But the rest of my job applications is just rejection after rejection. This has been going on since summer last year.

    I don’t mind whether it’s a normal or creative job. I just want a job where I fit in and not hated by everyone.
  • Laura_tigger82Laura_tigger82 Moderator Posts: 5,423 Part of The Furniture
    You deserve to feel valued at work @bignosegirly0. I can hear the length of time this has been going on for is particularly difficult :/

    Some pointers I have become aware of are: the importance of targeting applications to the job criteria on the job description and the STAR technique. The STAR technique is where you outline:

    The situation (usually the first sentence of the criteria)
    The task you have achieved which has shown you meet the criteria
    The action you took to achieve the technique
    The result of meeting the criteria. I often also link the result to how it could benefit the employer you are applying to.

    Do you feel like this might be something helpful for you too, or is there something else you think might be more helpful? Have any employers provided feedback on why your applications have not led to interviews or why the interviews might have been unsuccessful?

    The competition can also make it really difficult, despite how strong you might be in your applications and interviews! How are you coping with the process - does anything, in particular, help you to switch off? <3
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  • bignosegirly0bignosegirly0 Posts: 181 Helping Hand
    @Laura_tigger82 hello, sorry for the late reply. I would love to give that technique a try, thank you. Unfortunately, I haven’t received any actual feedback from the interviewers. I just receive automatic emails generated by a program, saying the same script of “unfortunately, we have moved onto other clients” etc.

    Although I’m losing hope, I’m still carrying on. Because I’m that desperate to get out my workplace. I just need to be more patient.
  • Laura_tigger82Laura_tigger82 Moderator Posts: 5,423 Part of The Furniture
    Please do not apologise for a delayed response @bignosegirly0. The most important thing is you feel heard and able to reach out to us for support when you want and need support.

    Feedback would be really helpful, wouldn't it? I understand that often interviewers have too many applicants (particularly from round 1!) to provide everyone with feedback but feedback helps us grow. Is there a common pattern in scripts for their desirable criteria?

    I see the 'desirable criteria' as cherries on the cake! (or that extra glitter if you are a fan of glitter!). It sounds really difficult that you are losing hope but you are so brave for carrying on. Patience can be difficult when we recognise we are in a space we don't feel comfortable, supported or thrive in! <3
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    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.
  • bignosegirly0bignosegirly0 Posts: 181 Helping Hand
    @Laura_tigger82 I definitely see your point. In regards to patterns of desirable criteria. It depends on the job. For instance, there is a current role at a cafe in my town. They’re looking for someone who can:
    “take on challenges”
    Be a “team player”
    Be a “multitasker”
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