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Im struggling. TW Alcohol, Scars, Eating, Suicide

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7
Comments
When you say you're concerned you won't be able to cope alone do you mean moving out?
Is there anyone you could open up to about your drinking habits? If it's really worrying you it might be worth talking to your GP but it's good that you've recognised a change in your drinking habits and the potential reason for it as that is really useful for you and maybe others to know.
Regarding the scars that's completely understandable however you're valid whether they are visible or not, your pain and experiences are still very real.
On the eating do you think the sense of accountability is useful for you? Surfing sounds like a great way to exercise in a fun way but I understand why this makes you concerned. Again it might help to reach out to your GP for specialist support or possibly some counselling sessions to help you through this.
It sounds like you're struggling with quite a few areas so I'm really thinking it would be a good idea to reach out to your GP or even just people close to you so someone knows what's going on for you. Suicidal thoughts can be very scary. Also you won't ruin anything we just want to help you as best as we can so if you feel like you need to take a break or step back no-one will feel offended and if you really were concerned about the quiz you could ask around and see if someone wants to step in.
Thoughts are just thoughts, it's just when they start to turn into a plan of action it gets really concerning so if you feel you have the ability to keep yourself safe then try not to get too overwhelmed or concerned over it. However if you feel like your thoughts are potentially going to lead to you being at risk it would definitely be advised to reach out, whether it's friends, family, teachers, or a helpline. You don't have to go into too much detail at first if the idea scares you or puts you off but the important thing is to reach out. You could say "I'm really struggling right now and need someone to talk to" or "I'm needing a distraction right now to help take my mind off things".
You're doing so well for reaching out, we all really care about you. I hope things get better for you soon but in the meantime keep us updated if you feel comfortable
I hope this somewhat helps
Speaking from personal experience, I really do remember and understand how leaving school can be incredibly emotional, overwhelming and can trigger a sense of abandonment that you might not expect. The build up after exams to prom/ leavers day can feel so exciting and hopeful but there is such an un-spoken come-down from all of that good stuff. The relationships you build with some teachers can be incredibly strong special, and letting go can feel really hard- it's not normal to be suddenly stripped away from the support system you've had for the last 5 or 6 years- so I really am not surprised that you're feeling as if you're on your own now.
Saying that, all of us we want to be here for you as much as possible and I am hearing how some of our guidelines might feel like a barrier to support so I want to remind you that if you ever have something you want to talk about but aren't sure if it fits the guidelines, just drop us a DM and we can review it together- how does that sound?
TW Drinking
I am so proud of you for recognising this as a concern and it is really positive that you have noticed a change. As I am sure you are already aware, it sounds like you might be using it as a coping mechanism, and while it might feel good in the short term, I am worried about it making things worse in the long run. There are lots of healthy ways to manage these feelings, and we can help you explore those options if you'd like to. I have found some helpful resources for you to take a look at when you're ready, though:
There is a service called Drinkline which offers support, advice and information to anyone who is concerned about their drinking, or someone else's. Drinkline is open Monday-Friday 9am-8pm, and Saturday-Sunday 11am-4pm. To contact them from England, you can call 0300 123 1110 and for Wales it is 0808 808 2234. You can also access their webchat service on their website from 9am-2pm on weekdays. You can also email via the website at www.alcoholconcern.org.uk
We Are With You provides free, confidential online support to people experiencing issues with drugs, alcohol or mental health. They can work with you on your own goals, whether that is reducing your drug or alcohol use, stopping completely or just staying safe and healthy. They have a range of information and advice on their website if you are concerned about yourself or someone else, they have a range of local services across England and Scotland, or you can chat to someone online via their webchat which is online Monday-Friday 9am-9pm and Saturday-Sunday 10am-4pm. Their website is https://www.wearewithyou.org.uk/
TW Eating
It's completely understandable to miss the accountability you had from your teachers, Chloe. Would you be open to talking about ways to find some new support? It might feel daunting at first, but there are definitely resources out there to help you. I did a little search on the Beat website and found some support groups- most of them look like they're starting at the beginning of July and it might be super helpful for you in terms of fulling that support gap during the summer holidays? I'll link them below (they all have really nice names which is a plus!)...
SWAN - Starting July 1st
A support group for anyone who has or thinks they may have anorexia.
NEST- Starting 2nd July
A support group for anyone with an eating disorder.
KINGFISHER- Starting 3rd July
A support group for anyone who has or thinks they may have bulimia.
TW Scars
It's completely understandable to have mixed emotions as scars fade. Scars can be a reminder of difficult times, but they are also a sign of healing. The most important thing for you to remember is that you are valid, worthy, and loved no matter how visible your scars are. Your pain and lived experiences are still very real and valid. Is relapsing something you are worried about right now? I would be more than happy to explore some coping mechanisms with you if it is.
TW Suicidal Thoughts
It's amazing and kind that you're pushing so hard to hold on for things that matter to you but it sounds like you're going through a really tough time right now. Having suicidal thoughts can be incredibly scary and isolating and you deserve more support. I will include some resources below if it ever feels like the suicidal feelings are too overwhelming to cope with.
Samaritans are reachable by phone and email 24/7. Whatever you're going through, you can call them any time, from any phone on 116 123. They also have a webchat option available during the day too.
We know you're our resident quizmaster, and it wouldn't be the same without you, but there would never be any pressure to host your quiz if you're not feeling up to it. If it feels like too much, please just let us know, and we can reschedule easily.
What's most important is that you're taking care of yourself. Would you consider talking to your GP soon? They can offer support and resources to help you access counselling, therapy, medication or any other types of support you need. It sounds like you are holding a lot right now Chloe, and I really do think it would be helpful for you.
This is a mega reply and a lot to take in but hopefully it helps in some way! We will always be here Chloe, and you definitely don't need to be worried about losing support from us. Remember you are capable and kind and the whole community believes in you. Sending hugs 💖
TW Drinking
I can hear how difficult this is for you. Please know, you're never "too young" to have an issue with drinking - it can, and does, affect people of all ages. And usually, something like alcohol can relieve pain/stress (e.g. "making you feel okay"), so addressing an underlying problem that is causing that stress is likely to help with this too. It's not uncommon to find it hard to contact services - what do you think makes it hard for you to reach out for support on this?
TW Suicidal Thoughts
I'm sorry to hear that losing support has had this impact on you, and unfortunately it's a common experience as well. It can be really frustrating when you seek and need support, and are let down repeatedly. There are other services that are available that might be helpful for the summer break before college starts - are there any that you're thinking of using? I want to reiterate - you deserve to be listened to and supported
I'm glad to hear that the college support network is good - I wonder if you could reach out to them, whether they would be able to offer you any support during the summer months? Might be a long shot, but worth a try. I hear that it's hard to know what will happen in the future - just take things one day at a time. You're stronger than you think, and you've done so well to open up about your experience with us here. Take things slowly and let us know how you're doing - we're here with you every step of the way
Sending big big hugs
Sinead
Thank you for opening up to us about everything you've been going through.
I understand it might be difficult to try to figure out if your drinking is becoming too much without a frame of reference - however, the simple fact that it is an issue that is causing you anxiety shows that opening up about it and talking to someone about your worries might be beneficial to you.
Alcohol Change UK is an organisation for individuals and the family and friends of individuals who have a harmful drinking life. They have a range of tools on their website to help you work out whether the amount you drink is harmful, to explore the effects your drinking is having on your body and some ways that you can cut down. They also have a range of different information and various other places where you can access some more support. Their website is https://alcoholchange.org.uk/. The tool to calculate whether or not your alcohol consumption is too much is here: https://alcoholchange.org.uk/alcohol-facts/interactive-tools/unit-calculator
I understand you might not want to alarm anyone in college before your enrolment, do you have any idea what type of services you might need at this moment until you're able to access support at your college?
Keep us updated and stay safe