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I have been affected by autism not being understood in the past
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Post edited by JustV on
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It's understandable that those comments affect your feelings. It's important to advocate for yourself and communicate your needs to those around you, including your teachers and support staff.
Their opinions don’t represent who you really are. Not everyone can understand you, so it’s important to take care of yourself. If you’re in a low mood, consider trying doing something enjoyable, taking a break, or talking to some friends.
Sorry to hear that you are feeling this was (sending hugs)
Its difficult when people do not understand you, it may be worth having a chat with them to express the effect that these comments are having on yourself?
Like Terry has said these comments do not reflect who you are and they have probably come from a lack of understanding, please make sure you take care of yourself as you are an amazing person
I can see how these comments could feel really deflating and hurtful, this lack of understanding from the staff members can have quite painful consequences. It can be challenging to not internalise these labels, especially if they're said repeatedly.
I'd agree with the posts above that having an open discussion with these staff members could be a positive next step. This will enable the staff to best support you, with an understanding of what conditions and approaches suit your manner of learning. You're deserving of a safe and supportive educational environment.
Take care.
It sounds frustrating for you that some staff don’t understand autism and how it relates to differences in communication, even in written form. But try not to let those comments get to you. It really is just from ignorance. I’ve known a few autistic people who write things that would be considered ‘wordy’ but that’s actually what makes them such good writers!
With regards to the comment about needing to manage your time better, it might help to briefly plan what you are going to write about (and think about roughly how long it might take you to write each section). I’ve also heard that if you feel you are taking too long to answer a question, you might want to bullet point the rest of your answer as you might still be able to pick up some marks for your bullet points, before moving on to the next question.
I’m also wondering whether you are able to get any adjustments due to your autism? For example, if staff know that you are autistic and how this might affect your performance in an exam (e.g. needing more time to answer questions instead of needing to manage your time better) then you might be able to have extra time in exams? It’s definitely worth speaking to some teachers about this and mentioning how your autism can affect your written work.
I understand it can be really difficult when you’ve been misunderstood and sometimes these memories just seem to pop up and affect you. But as others have said, they don’t reflect you at all. And every day these is always more research, awareness and advocacy for autistic people so even if some people don’t understand right now, it doesn’t mean it will always be this way. There are others who will be more understanding.
I’m also wondering why you say you feel you are expected to switch off your emotions and be happy again? Emotions are tricky things because sometimes it can help to distract ourselves and try not to dwell on thoughts and instead try to be happy (and we may then feel a bit better) but other times it’s good to know that it’s okay to feel what you feel. If you feel misunderstood then it’s understandable that you will feel low as a result. But it doesn’t mean you should try to switch off your feelings and be happy. Maybe you can use these feelings of being misunderstood in a positive way instead- such as helping to educate others on autism or using your feelings to write about being misunderstood etc. to help others.
As others have suggested, it can be difficult feeling misunderstood so take good care of yourself