A comment from my brother

Comments

• AislingDM Posts: 1,666 Extreme Poster

  November 2022

  That's very frustrating @Creativeboy23 , even reading what your mentor said felt jarring to me, and I'm not the one on the receiving end!! Sometimes people really do lack a sense of compassion when they are trying to give you insight, and in the end a lack of kindness kind of invalidates any intention of kindness/support.
  
  I couldn't agree more with you that your brother's comment was unkind and uncalled for, regardless of his intentions, or how he perceives therapy himself, he should not be pushing that narrative onto you. Especially because being brave enough to acknowledge that you need help is already a huge thing, you shouldn't be ridiculed for that!
  
  It seems to me like a lot of people would be better listeners if they were familiar with the difference between venting and solutions. To be totally honest, I only learned about this over the past few years, but a lot of the time in a situation like yours, people (me and you included) just want to express their upset and have their feelings heard, rather than looking for the person's behaviour (him saying you don't need therapy) to be explained to us. I am glad you've come to talk to us on here about your frustration, because it certainly is not right for your brother to say that, and not helpful of your mentor to co-sign his words.
  
  Huge hugs xx
  
  P.S., if you want here is an article you could send to people/post online to explain your stance on sometimes just needing to vent:
  
  https://jswilder16.medium.com/sometimes-we-just-need-to-let-people-vent-e8696ac9da27

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• Past User Posts: 0 Just got here

  November 2022

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• AislingDM Posts: 1,666 Extreme Poster

  November 2022

  Exactly!! I reckon that some people don't even realise the harm they are causing with their words because they pick them out without really thinking of the consequences @Creativeboy23 Regardless, you are having to cope with so much all at once and wanting people to understand that and simply listen is a completely reasonable request I will always be here to listen no matter what, so seriously, thank you for talking to us on here about these situations of invalidation xx

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