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Hot and cold with people

Where to start?
It's hot and cold with everyone I meet.
I meet someone new, we get along.
You get too close and I'm gone.
I want friends but the closer they are,
the riskier it gets.
They start to see you.
Recognize you.
Familiarize themselves with you.
They see the flaws you carry.
They know you too well.
I don't trust you.
Then comes the conflicts,
the heartbreaks, the arguments.
The all-too-familiar fear kicks in
the intrusive thoughts, the uneasiness.
Back to Square 1 again:
I don't trust you.
I love you, my friend, but
I can't settle, knowing that one day
the flaws I carry will blind you.
Hello!
I'm trying to cope with the loss of two friends (Probably a whole group tbh) and I guess this is one way?
It's hot and cold with everyone I meet.
I meet someone new, we get along.
You get too close and I'm gone.
I want friends but the closer they are,
the riskier it gets.
They start to see you.
Recognize you.
Familiarize themselves with you.
They see the flaws you carry.
They know you too well.
I don't trust you.
Then comes the conflicts,
the heartbreaks, the arguments.
The all-too-familiar fear kicks in
the intrusive thoughts, the uneasiness.
Back to Square 1 again:
I don't trust you.
I love you, my friend, but
I can't settle, knowing that one day
the flaws I carry will blind you.
Hello!
I'm trying to cope with the loss of two friends (Probably a whole group tbh) and I guess this is one way?
Tagged:
2
Comments
I hope that one day you'll be able to look back and re-write this so that you have friends who stay with you when they see the real you and aware that you are hurting and not able to trust!
There's a lot I need to work on personally and I know that friends are there to support you but it's always a gamble. And I believe coming into new relationships with a mindset can be hurtful but it's what I'm used to.
Always happy to listen if you ever need anything.
Thank you so much
Thank you so much. I hope you found a good companion! ^^