Home› Sex & Relationships
If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Options

Depressed about the state of marriages

2»

Comments

  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Evenstar wrote: »
    society expects you to get married when it is right. it's one and the same

    Id love to be able to say Im a person not a number, but those who know me, know I cant really get away saying that :lol:
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    MrG wrote: »
    Id love to be able to say Im a person not a number, but those who know me, know I cant really get away saying that :lol:

    I know you a bit, you are definitely a number :P
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    MrG wrote: »
    No, Id want to get married because I wanted to, because it was right, not because (as it seems) society expects me to.

    Exactly. This is what I'm saying. :confused:
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    MrG wrote: »
    If it was just them, and nothing else would change, apart from financial security, and possibly not even that, would it be worth it, if they would still be perfectly happy otherwise?
    MrG wrote: »
    No, Id want to get married because I wanted to, because it was right, not because (as it seems) society expects me to.

    But youve been saying all along theres no point to it. So why do you wanna get married. Im so confused
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I dont want to get married just for the sake of it.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    No, no one does. Im not saying marriage solves everything even if you dont love the person, just that it depressing how little faith people seem to have in the idea
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    MrG wrote: »
    Once again, why put all your hope and expectations into a piece of paper if you love someone enough, why do you have to prove it to anyone else but you and your partner?

    It's not the piece of paper. It's the promise. It's saying, in front of whatever power you believe in (God, or the law, or your family, or whatever) that you love this person so much that you promise that you will choose them above all else, always.

    Of course, if you don't mean it when you promise, the promise is meaningless. And obviously on the flip side, just because you don't promise doesn't mean you don't mean it.

    It's a choice. You should do it only cause you want to, cause you think it's right, and then what you don't need is all the cynics crawling out of the woodwork saying, 'it's only a piece of paper' or 'it's 50/50 it'll end in divorce anyway'. Live and let live, that's all that's being said here.
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Kaff wrote: »
    It's not the piece of paper. It's the promise. It's saying, in front of whatever power you believe in (God, or the law, or your family, or whatever) that you love this person so much that you promise that you will choose them above all else, always.

    I agree. It is also a way of publicly declaring and celebrating your love with your friends and family ... though some of the weddings I've attended in my time, you might wonder!? :D
  • Options
    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Kaff wrote: »
    It's not the piece of paper. It's the promise. It's saying, in front of whatever power you believe in (God, or the law, or your family, or whatever) that you love this person so much that you promise that you will choose them above all else, always.

    Of course, if you don't mean it when you promise, the promise is meaningless. And obviously on the flip side, just because you don't promise doesn't mean you don't mean it.

    It's a choice. You should do it only cause you want to, cause you think it's right, and then what you don't need is all the cynics crawling out of the woodwork saying, 'it's only a piece of paper' or 'it's 50/50 it'll end in divorce anyway'. Live and let live, that's all that's being said here.

    I love you Kaff *hug*
Sign In or Register to comment.