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I disagree, it seems to me, by her actions, it is final. If Steve then attempts a call back to "make her understand why you're annoyed" then this will most likely be misinterpreted. If she has taken the stance where she is in control and ended the relationship then there really isn't anything that can be done.
Steve will need to get back to basics, do some stuff to make him feel better about himself as no doubt he feels a little rough now and thus claw back some self-respect.
The best outcome this could have would be for Steve to be over her and feeling much better about things. Then, if they meet when out somewhere perhaps then they can have the "you made me feel pretty bad" chat - but until both parties are calm and in a position where they can have an adult chat then the best way forward is to accept that this is now the way things are.
I appreciate it's rubbish but that is just the way people are - human relationships are infinitely complex and in truth we really don't know all of the details and only have Steve's side of the story. Even if we knew all the details it may simply be the girlfriend. Who knows.
Just my opinion.
A.
The way she's finished with him though you're right, just f-her.
The girl I was going to start dating took her own life a few days ago so I feel pretty gutted.
Like I said, that's just life, people are unpredictable - but in as much as life is horrendously tragic like that, it can and is often very much uplifting and venerable.
A.
Ouch
Well SORRY i didnt see that part
*breathe*
I wasn't having a go, girly...
You've been going out for a year and my guess is that she is trying to score points. And when you do soemthing she doesnt like, she tries to pay you back. It's her way of telling you she isnt happy.
But you could change your course, coz atm you'r arguing back and your both making it worse, ask her if something is wrong, if you stop being defensive, she might open up to somthing you didnt know about. Let her know your not the enemy.
If you've done this or if it doesnt work, give her something to worry about yourself, or give her an ultimatum
something along the lines of- this is two ways, i dont want us to cary on like this, ill try if u try. And if you dont want to, maybe we shouldnt be togetehr.
goodluck
Either way, there is no way in hell I'm just going to jump back into her arms like a complete dick. I may well get the chance to see her again on Tuesday, after well over a fortnight apart, but I'll see what happens there.
One of my friends (a bird, oddly enough) tells me that she reckons it was a breakdown in communication, which I was pointing the finger at anyway, and it looks like she's made quite a point of advising me on what I should be doing.
But as far as I'm concerned, better wait and see if she's learnt her lesson anyway. I'm just keeping an open mind for now.
Agreed!
Call it what you like but the bitch was acting like a spoilt brat, not the sort of shit you need in your life. But if you still care/love her reason will go out the window and you'll likely get back with her. Take it from someone who's been back with exs far too many times to even remember, things rarely change and old problems will surface again and again.
Good thing is it's your call so you can decide what happens next but ask yourself why she is contacting you, could it be that she missing having someone in her life to lavish her with attention? Do you want to be in her life just because she doesn't want to be single?
Think what you want and if it is her, then make sure she earn your respect and don't put up with her shit!
We'll see, eh?
Sounds good IMO. Sounds like she's insecure of what she really wants or that she seems to want to keep you until better come along, there are always some people like that out there. If you think the latter is the most probable explanation, I wouldn't bother to get into a new relationship. You're worth more than that.
Well thats okay then
First few days have been alirght, but today for some odd reason, she's just turned again. I make a few comments about shopping, and all she does is put on a sour face and make me feel guility for everything that's gone wrong. "Oh, it's your moods etc etc....". Well, does that excuse you treating me like an idiot?
I don't know what i was doing, and I'm still not sure, but this thread sure ain't half handy for venting my spleen.
Gonna be blunt. You're a fool to take her back.
She's already started doing it again. Open your eyes mate and grow a pair. Get shut of her.
People CAN'T change, just like that.
What were the conditions upon you getting back together?
The main problem is always that if neither has changed then nothing has or will change. The problem will almost certainly rear its ugly head once again, and, as you've said as much here, it would seem nothing has changed.
There is little you can do but discuss the issues sooner rather than later and either both agree to make a few changes or agree to go your separate ways ultimately.
For the last couple of weeks, it's not been all bad really! Soon we were back to our old ways, she was actually really nice. She was even rather nice today, but she later on me for some reason.
It must be irritating after all that's been said to see me writing all this now, but it's frustrating for me wonder what to do, when the answer to everyone else must be bloody obvious. To quote that Who song "You can't switch off my loving, like you can't switch off the sun"
The girl still gives me butterflies in my stomach and all that, despite the fact that she has hurt me of late. Love really is a complicated and difficult thing, eh?
Sticking around seems easy, easier than going back to singledom, which on the other hand could be the best way to move forward. Especially when part of me does feel that splitting up in the first place perhaps caused irrepairable damage to the relationship.
I totally appreciate your pain and love and situation, however, let me allow for a different perspective.
How long are you prepared to put up with her for the sake of your love before becoming the veritable kicked puppy or doormat, a push over. It's just a thought, something to consider...
Another little point, although it doesn't exactly apply to the situation indulge me for a moment.
I friend of mine has just turned 40, he is so whipped that his "girlfriend" can do whatever she likes, even sleep with other guys, simply because he is more afraid of being alone for the rest of his life than growing a spine and standing up for himself - his very life is the epitome of cringe worthy.
He is a joke to everyone that knows him because of this situation. The sad thing is that a lot of girls I know say he's good to talk to and is attractive but, despite ALL of this, he really isn't interested.
Another sad thing is that if/when he ever does meet anyone new, he is going to be extremely cruel and late all of this guilt and hurt feelings at her doorstep making sure she feels truly worthless, which, in my opinion is an awful thing to do. And all because he doesn't have the balls, courage and or self respect to stand up for himself. He is a loser and no one respects him.
The confident guy isn't.
Just a few thoughts.