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Bored of relationship...

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
in Sex & Relationships
Just the other day, I was saying how much I missed my OH. He's about 260 miles away and over the weekend/monday, I missed him like crazy..

And now I don't? I just feel bored. It's only been 4 months, and I'm bored already.

This utter sillyness...

And why such extreme feelings? One minute I'm madly in love, the next, I'm bored. It's silly.

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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    dunno, I'm the same though, it's a head fuck.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think 3/4 months into a relationship is around about the time when you do sort of know the person pretty well and things start calming down after all the dizziness of a new relationship.

    Do you feel like you're stuck in a routine already?

    I'd imagine the distance would be a bitch though. If it was me then I'd send her a bunch of flowers or write her a random love letter as a surprise, just cause it's something different to do.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Bri-namite wrote: »
    I think 3/4 months into a relationship is around about the time when you do sort of know the person pretty well and things start calming down after all the dizziness of a new relationship.

    Do you feel like you're stuck in a routine already?

    I'd imagine the distance would be a bitch though. If it was me then I'd send her a bunch of flowers or write her a random love letter as a surprise, just cause it's something different to do.

    bri please marry me :heart:

    are you bored when you're with him? or just bored when he's away?
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    BunnieBunnie Posts: 6,099 Master Poster
    You are probably just bored of the situation, thinking how much easier it would be to just end it and not have the horrible feelings of missing him.

    See how you feel when you see him again, and I would put money on you being crazy about him when you do!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Curvy_lass wrote: »
    And why such extreme feelings? One minute I'm madly in love, the next, I'm bored. It's silly.


    I think it's natural to have up and down feelings. I'm exactly the same. Sometimes I feel really close to my bf and lucky to have him, and then the next time I see him he might annoy me.

    If the negative feelings outweigh the positive ones, you need to have a look at the relationship.

    Your own feelings affect the way you feel about others, so if you're tired, you might feel grouchy and bored.

    Don't throw something good away just because you're bored sometimes :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    CheeseOnToast wrote: »
    dunno, I'm the same though, it's a head fuck.
    It is isn't it...
    Bri-namite wrote: »
    I think 3/4 months into a relationship is around about the time when you do sort of know the person pretty well and things start calming down after all the dizziness of a new relationship.
    I guess you're right. Nothing is more fun then the 'honeymoon' period of butterflies when they contact you, send silly little texts etc.
    clementine_the_tangerine wrote: »
    are you bored when you're with him? or just bored when he's away?
    I definitely think this is the case, when I'm with him, things couldn't get better, but whilst I'm here, it's easy to want something fun right at that moment.
    Bunnie wrote: »
    You are probably just bored of the situation, thinking how much easier it would be to just end it and not have the horrible feelings of missing him.

    See how you feel when you see him again, and I would put money on you being crazy about him when you do!
    Bunnie, you perfectly summed up how I felt yesterday. We're reunited in weeks time, and as much as my bad mood wanted me to ignore it, I had a minute feeling of excitement!!
    *charlotta* wrote: »
    hmm 4 months isnt really a long time is it...
    I don't believe I ever said I thought 4 months WAS a long time?
    katchika wrote: »
    I think it's natural to have up and down feelings. I'm exactly the same. Sometimes I feel really close to my bf and lucky to have him, and then the next time I see him he might annoy me.

    If the negative feelings outweigh the positive ones, you need to have a look at the relationship.

    Your own feelings affect the way you feel about others, so if you're tired, you might feel grouchy and bored.

    Don't throw something good away just because you're bored sometimes :)
    katchika, thanks for your post. I am glad I am not alone. I feel the same way as you - maybe its just human nature? The negative feelings DEFINITELY don't outweigh the positives, in fact, the negatives happen quite rarely, I guess I just posted in a bad time!

    I shan't be throwing away anything, anytime soon!! :)
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    BunnieBunnie Posts: 6,099 Master Poster
    *charlotta* wrote: »
    No. but im saying that i dont think it is a long time.

    But why should she not feel confused because it has only been 4 months?

    I personally think 4 months is a substantial amount of time, and as Bri said is when you pretty much know anything you should about a partner.

    Curvy Lass, I did it for a year, so I know how you feel and how hard it can be, so PM me any time :)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Doubts are part of any relationship, and the problem with long-distance affairs is that all feelings get magnified. The feelings of love are maginified because you see them less often, the sex is hotter, but the feelings of loneliness and boredom when they're not there are stronger too.

    If the positives outweigh the negatives then you will be fine, but you wouldn't be human if you didn't sometimes wonder if it was worth it. You wouldn't be human if you didn't sometimes think that there might be something better closer to home.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    ive done the whole LDR thing and honest to god i didnt find it that bad, used to take it in turns at weekends driving up and down the country, that didnt bother me either, used to go after work on a friday and granted it would sometimes take me 4 or 5 hours but it got my mind out of work mode.

    there were also times when it was hard, but the good times should outweigh the bad, if its still not right when you are together, maybe its time to think again.

    worth it all now tho as we're living together and everything is fine and dandy!

    good luck!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Know exactly how ya feel. Been doing similar distance since beginning of Sept and most the time is sheer hell. When I'm with him everything is fantastic, but when we're not together the hurt and loneliness so often get the better of me. There have been numerous times when I've wondered why I'm doing it, is it really worth it. LDR's are just like rollercoasters...you get highs and lows when you're together and apart and both are exagerated feelings. Just got to take a step back and evaluate what things are really like and weigh up the pro's and cons.
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