Men crying...

Former Member

I would not worry about it red jelly, I started this post after my boyfriend cried on Sunday night while we were having our post sex cuddle, as he was so happy and he loved me so much. It was a bit strange to start off with but then he told me how great this last year together had been, in the end I was almost crying.

Former Member

Kiezo wrote:

Well, stereotypically, it is. Generally, women like men who act like men, not ones who're 'in touch with their feminine sides'.

If they wanted to go out with people like that, they'd become lesbians.

Some women like men who can admit their feelings, so many people are conditioned not to show their emotions because its a bad thing, which isn't good in the long run.

Former Member

Little_one wrote:

I would not worry about it red jelly, I started this post after my boyfriend cried on Sunday night while we were having our post sex cuddle, as he was so happy and he loved me so much. It was a bit strange to start off with but then he told me how great this last year together had been, in the end I was almost crying.

aww thats soo sweet!

Former Member

Kermit wrote:

How true.

Still, it makes him feel happy to be "controversial", which is really quite sweet really.

If you cry at everything then you need to see a shrink.
If you have never cried through happiness then you have never been happy.
If you never feel close enough to someone to cry in front of them or in their arms, then you've never been close to someone.

Thank you.

You can't take your own reactions to emotion and apply them to all and sundry...people vary, there is no standard.

You can be close to someone without feeling comfortable crying in front of them...all depends on you as an individual, the other person, and the relationship dynamics.

Former Member

everyone has feelings, its only natural to cry regardless of sex
i heard my dad crying the other day, and i dont think ive ever heard him cry before

Former Member

Little_one wrote:

So Iknowyourmum, you have never discussed your feelings at all, not ever. I remember one time my boyfriend discussed his feelings with me when his nan had a stroke and they where worried about if she would be able to cope on her own once she was allowed home. When something like that happens I think most people would cry a little and would want to discuss their feelings.

Obviously that post of mine wasn’t entirely serious

Well sometimes I find it hard to discus my feelings about but this depends on what it’s about really and other circumstances. If pressed to my favourite avoidance technique is to talk about something personal (the real you) that your comfortable talking about e.g. your relationship with your father, or with your cousin or gran or something talk about that for a while, and that avoids talking about your true feelings.
Therefore I can bottle up all my simmering rage anger resentment and insecurities with out having to address them or resolve them: like a real man ! *

As for crying in front of a girlfriend (not that I’ve had loads) I’ve never done it, but most of them have cried to me a quite a few times, If a woman cries a lot over relatively minor matters, I'll think she's weak and dippy and probably mildly attention/comfort seeking, If a man cries a lot over relatively little Ill think he's got serious issues much more so than with a women.
This either underlines my out dated sexist attitude or one of the many differences between them





Note to Little_one thats irony

Former Member

I'd like it if my boyfriend cried in front of me... will make me think that he doesn't mind holding back the tears/feelings with me.

Would be nice to comfort him in that situation.

Former Member

Sometimes I can feel a little uncomfortable, but generally I'm fine with it. It depends on the situation and who it is though.

Former Member

Spliffie wrote:

You can't take your own reactions to emotion and apply them to all and sundry...people vary, there is no standard.

Well as it was a question about opinion I can, really.

I'd be worried about a man who was ashamed to cry in front of his wife, tbh.

Former Member

Little_one wrote:

what do you think? Do you believe men should not show there emontions

i think there needs to be a line between what you'd expect emotionally from men / woman. i have yet to meet a sensitive guy. but i do think a guy shouldn't be a pussy.

~ and i'm really sorry to say that so crudly but i cannot think of another way of getting over what i mean...

Former Member

I definitely think it's a cool thing, I've seen all my guy mates cry at one stage or another, it's good

Former Member

Kermit wrote:

I'd be worried about a man who was ashamed to cry in front of his wife, tbh.

my mum has never seen my dad crying, and they've been happily married for over 30 years. that said, he didn't cry when either of us were born, or when his dad died.

some people are just not crying types.

i don't mind men crying when there's a reason, they're human, after all, but i once knew a guy who cried at everything, inculding maury povich when they reunited the mother and daughter who'd not seen each other for 25 years, and i have to admit that i did think he was a bit of a woman.

Former Member

I cry all the time. I've called up members from this site crying my eyes out, I've even cried in front of my parents recently. I think there is nothing wrong with it. It does no good to hide your emotions all the time. Social teachings about how men should be "strong and silent" have done countless amounts of damage to men's lives for too long.

Former Member

The most startling although moving thing I've ever seen in my whole life is seeing my father sitting on the floor in his room curled up sobbing because his father passed away. It was the first time I had ever seen him cry and the last and it made me feel so upset to see that even Superman can break down. :crying:
My ex used to cry all the time and go through my phone when I broke up with him which pissed me off to be honest. I think its good if men can share their feelings but all my ex used to do was work himself up into a jealous frenzy and have crying tantrums like a big baby, he NEVER told me what was wrong and that's what pissed me off.

Former Member

rawr wrote:

The most startling although moving thing I've ever seen in my whole life is seeing my father sitting on the floor in his room curled up sobbing because his father passed away. It was the first time I had ever seen him cry and the last and it made me feel so upset to see that even Superman can break down. :crying:

Aww I remember my eighty-year-old grandad coming across this ancient black & white pic of his father and getting really upset, it was so sweet but the saddest thing in the world too..