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The only person who controls how people see you is you. If you hide in a corner and mouse away from everyone then they will not see you. If they can't see you or notice you then how can they fancy you?
If you believe that sexual attraction is all about penis size then you're a complete and utter fool. The sexiest thing is trust, not 26 feet of throbbing man meat.
You are attractive if you consider yourself to be, you are ugly if you consider yourself to be. When you think yourself ugly you don't see the admiring glances, you think everyone is staring at your hideousness, and run away. If you think you're God's Gift, then you see every look as a girl with the horn for you. The balance for most people is always somewhere in the middle.
So what if you're 18 and never kissed a girl? I hadn't, and I've had my share of pretty girls, and I've married a stunner. I'm not exactly God's Gift, but I learned to realise that someone can like me and love me. I get hit on far more now that I know I'm quite brilliant really, which is how it works.
Sounds about right.
Admitidly I've only slept with one girl, but...
If I put it in too far it hurts my gf, I end up only going in half way, so what's the point of the rest of it when it doesn't even go in!? It would make no difference to her if it was 4 inches shorter. I really wouldn't worry about size at all, it's not that important in a good relationship.
Oh, I know what you meant, I was just saying that you need to be careful not to obsess too much about the sex and completely forget about the person.
You'll be fine if you find a bit of confidence. When you're 18 and still a virgin it can feel like the end of the world, but it really doesn't matter. More people are virgins at that age than anyone lets on, because thsoe who are getting laid want to brag about it and the media make their money from making everyone feel shite about not having sex.
I have issues with being shy sometimes... When I see a girl or guy I like (ESPECIALLY a pretty girl... whooo boy!) I freeze up and go bright red and everything I say seems to come out in a jumble. I used to think people found me unattractive, but now I think that perhaps it's more of a confidence thing... Confidence pretty much equals attractiveness and most people aren't smart enough to know when you're faking it.
As i say, i'm not dissimiliar to alot of the people who have posted on here, because i don't exactly exuberate self confidence, nor do i find a particular desire to go over and talk to people for the sake of being confident, but there will come a point when you have to realise enough is enough, release your inhibitions and go for it, what is the worst that can happen? People won't find you interesting? Well so what? They're probably not interesting to you either.
I'm in your position in that i'm almost 19 and still a virgin, funny thing is though, i couldn't care less. I've had the opportunities and simply not felt ready / right. Sex is not that important, and you shouldn't make a big issue of it and try and make it become one. If you go out, make the effort to speak to people, meet friends of friends etc, then you shouldn't have a problem talking to girls, you'll make friends, and maybe something will come of that, and if it doesn't you've still got female friends, who you can have a good time with just being friends.
I guess the moral of the above ramble of words is only you can change youself, so however hard it may seem go out and do it, because it's not as difficult after the first time.
Iv never been close to any family and Iv lost contact with all my school mates(they went off doing drugs/college)so its hard to go out to clubs as Id look well stupid going alone
Iv never felt I could trust anyone 100% either as sooner or later they`ll slag me off behind my back and fuck me over.
I know I sound like Im whining but when you feel totally alone wherever you are and whoever your with and seeing everyone with someone else and me alone it does get quite hard.
Its hard to explain it as well as you can probably tell by reading this.....
and when i see how happy they are it makes me realise what a lonely shit i really am, but i try not to think about it too much.
Iv never been close to ANYONE and have never trusted someone totally and probably never will as Iv been fucked over by people being false to my face then slagging me off behind my back. :mad: Iv just resigned myself to the fact Im probably MEANT to be alone and have got so used to girls hating me I could never go out with a girl and believe she wanted to be there with me......the ideas bloody ludicrous!!
This sounds extreme but I survived 5years of this by just cutting away from the problems when I thought of them to think of something else.
The problems here are, that you have decided that you are all these negative things, and if you think you are that, you will give that impression to others. I can't help other people change themselves, you have to realise for yourself, that you do have something to offer to other people, if you think you don't, then why would other people think you do?
I can only speak from my own experience, and that is i used to be quite shy - to some extent i still am, and i do still value my own company and spend some time alone, I felt alot like alot of the people who have posted. The very fact that you say these things mean you recognise and probably want to change. So change! Look at yourself and look at your qualities, then share them! I know it's so easy to say and so difficult to do, but if you want it enough you can! Don't resign yourself to being lonely, resign yourself to making friends and meeting people, it's alot harder, but it's alot more fun.
These stories really really sadden me sometimes. I'd like to think that if i grew up knowing someone who felt like this, I could have helped them.
Your right about me deciding all these negative things.....but how can I not when thats all Iv ever been recognised as?Iv never been good at anything so I havent had anything to offer anyone so I was just ignored.
Sorry to keep whining but I really cant think of any good point to focus on and build up.Sad but true.
Thanks anyway though.