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Abusive Sex
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
How come whenever I have sex its always really rough and painful? I've had four sexual partners. Though two were one night stands and the other two brief flings. Surelly, sex shouldn't still be hurting me just because I don't have it frequently? What do you think? Anyone have a similiar problem? Sex just feels like torture most of the time. 
Its not fair.
Its not fair. 0
Comments
do you mean it is always rough ? because that can certainly make it painful
But as Blah_x2 said, you're a bit unclear.
Do you mean you're afterwards (and still) physically hurting because of the sex? Then maybe you should get it checked with a doctor.
Or are you talking about men being rough with you? Then maybe you should leave off the casual sex for a while and find someone who is caring about you (easier said that done, fine) but see if even gentle, it still hurts you.
Meh..dunno if that's what you were talking bout, hope it helped!
If sex was painful for you then you perhaps were not aroused enough, possibly becaus ethey were just flings. Similarly, "flings" are not going to care too much what you like, really.
If its hurting you, youre allowed to stop. Youre always allowed to say no, at any stage, whatever. If youve said no, and they dont stop, then its abusive.
Do they know it hurts you? Have you tried using a lubricant?
I communicate with guys and I tell them to move slower or to not do certain things because it hurts but they kinda stop for a while and do it again!
Also, about the fact they've all being short term... half of them told me they were looking for something serious and that they wanted a girlfriend; blantently they lied but I didn't wanna see that because I like to think people tell the truth... I'm stupid. lol
Sorry to hear youve been through that, im not sure what to suggest, but I expect youll find lots of support and advice on here.
That's not simply 'rough sex'! That's completely unacceptable!!
he should be fucking strung up :mad:
That's rape.
If you keep ending up in bed with men like that then the only thing I would say is be more careful.
I'd just like to remind you that having sex with men does not make you attractive, and men wanting to sleep with you is not the only barometer of attractiveness. If you say no to people they will still like you, hon, and any that doesn't isn't worth bothering about.
*hug*
That was un called for. I dont see her as an attention seeker. She's not posting in everyother thread saying "omg this this and this happened to me, oh woe is me i'm going to take my own life!!"
She came here with a question, told us some imformation and that info turned out to be more serious than she first thought it was.
The ironic thing is, of course, who's saying it.
Go and play with the traffic, nobhead.
EyeCee- I hope these links help you and you should remember that when you have sex with someone at the absolute minimum you deserve respect from them. I've also included a link to a support line which you may find helpful.
painful sex sexual offences supportline
Don't feel like an attention seeker. It's important for you to feel like you can talk openly here. And you can, the odd wanker makes us all seem bad.
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You have absolutely nothing to be sorry about. Is good you're willing to get councelling though, as it may help you get things off your chest. As it's no good to keep stuff like that to yourself. Though do you not have a friend you could talk to?
It's something that is very difficult to bring up with a friend, even a close one. It takes an awful lot of courage to confide in a friend.
EyeCee, if you want to talk with someone about it then you can always email Jo at the Samaritans, and they will help you with care and sympathy.
That can be true. So I understand that. But I was just asking, as it may help to get some moral support from someone she knows and can comfort her when she needs it.
Oh, it almost certainly will help. But it's not as easy as that, and for some people it is too horrible an experience to recount to any person that they know.
can i join
you do not seem like an attention seeker at all, it was just the noob being incredibly stupid. do not listen.
counselling may well be a good help. i know some people who have benefited immensely from it, growing more confident and trusting the right people. however it doesn't work for 100% of people, so keep trying until you find something.
you do not need to use your body to get men. and anybody who abuses anybody else needs to be sorted out!
Hey Binx, you little fuck wit. what kick are you getting out of this ? You are the kind of insensitive fuck she is talking about.
why don't you find some sort of gob shites chat forum where they discuss who can be the biggest prick.
You are fucking lucky that this has not happened to any one you care about.
Now get the fuck off this thread........