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Theres also the risk that it could make you very very ill as it often does to new users.
It really is one of the drugs you should avoid, especially since you dont like the out of it feeling of the downers youre on. Heroin isnt likely to help you feel more alert.
Well the truth is I don't really believe in therapy. Yeah what my therapist says makes sense and the book we work out of makes sense, it's just the world doesn't make sense.
When I was little I used to get that 'out-of-body' feeling you get when you smoke Cannibus or take PCP or Ketamine(going off of what thesite says about those last two there). That feeling like you have no control over your body, the situation, or your surroundings. The thing is I wasn't on anything. I was apparently just having a panic attack. Well they continued. I had to quit every sport I was involved in and become a hermit in my room. Sure I have plenty of friends, but I never do anything. I've never had a girlfriend, although I think the reasons for that is different. None the less my social life has suffered.
I also hate being sober. I used to drink alot. Every day before school and I'd take some with me so I'm kept drunk throughout the day. I did this until about last week and the only reason is I ran out of alcohol and money. It's pathetic and I'm not proud of it, but I'm not a generally upbeat, happy, confident person. I like being out of it but I don't like these downers cause they're prescribed for one thing and they don't take me out of it that much at all. They just make me bored and irritated at people, school, anything.
But thanks for the replies. This is a good thread, I've learned more than I could from everyone here than anyone else I know.
Now lets take it to the next step. I get the feeling Junker wants to use drugs to black the problems out, its an escape from reality. The thing is one you have had whatever drug you still have to face reality, its the same with the alcohol, whilst drinking you can become someone else, not this quiet, unconfident person you normally are.
I really think if you get to the root of the problem and the only way to do that is to talk about it. Get all this bottled up stuff off your chest with a trained counsellor. You may feel that counselling is not working for you at the beginning but after several sessions it does get better.
Its no good relying on something to give you this boost every time, you can manage without alcohol because you did when you ran out of money, so you can do it by yourself.
Not sure how old you are, but obviously quite young so dont worry about the girlfriend thing I was pretty much the same at school, didnt have boyfriends, was very unconfident but once i left school and kinda grew up it did become easier to meet people and have relationships.
Good luck
:yes: :yes: :yes:
That couldnt be put any better..
how about you print off this thread and take it to your councilor or gp. you could ask your gp if there is something else he can prescibe instead of or as well as. try it. you might just get what you need.
sorry your struggling at the moment but you have to believe things can and do get better ...trouble is it's down to you to make it happen ...was it chairman mao ...'every great march starts with the first step'.
As others have said, you can not escape problems with drugs, it WILL make them worse, thats certain.
But taking drugs to escape problems isn't the way to take them, going out at the weekend and getting stoned drunk messed up anything you want to call it, tripping but you do it for fun at the weekend...not to escape problems and heroin i don't think it would be a 'weekend' kind of thing, you wouldn't be using heroin on a weekly basis..it would be a daily basis eventually, heroin just seems a dirty drug to me and i would never touch it.
You should always decide whether to do something on the balance of up's and down's, heroin has FAR more down's than up's.
I dont really see how a drug can or can not be 'dirty' it is a drug, simple.
It can be pure or impure, but it is just a chemical, it cant be good, bad, evil... there are not objective terms you can use.
anything your frightened of ...unhappy with ...suffering from ...heroin WILL relieve you of those problems instantly.
the trouble arises when you are not in the least bit equipped to handle the new set of problems illegal heroin suddenly unleashes on you. it's like some kind of black magic or voodoo ...all is well now ...and somehow your mind manages to deny the new set of problems you are now having to deal with. they start of small and insignificant and grow alarmingly into a monster that has total control of you ...and then you realy do go into what is now medicaly accepted as a situation called denial. it's not the drug thats the problem ...the drug actualy helps ...the problems are financial ...legal ...family ...i'm misunderstood and so on. in the stages of denial your life falls to bits as the addiction gets an ever greater grip on your body and soul.
yes it did solve all your problems regarding feelings ...but that was a while ago ...it isn't doing that anymore but your thought processes have been chemicaly altered to make you believe that the heroin is doing what it originaly did ...and somehow ...somehow ...you manage to deny that the drug is now the cause of more problems than any individual should ever have to cope with.
if you come off the stuff sucsessfully you then find your back with the original problems that heroin seemed to fix ...realy it only buried them ...so what to do now ...oh sod it just give me another hit ...heroin is wonderful and deceptive ...it inhances your reality ...it rids you of your problems ...thats why people get sucked in to the point of self destruction.
it's a great feeling to be free from the stuff. it's great being able to smoke weed and drink alcohol in sensible amounts. it's great to be trusted again. it's great having responsibilities. it's fantastic being able to love and laugh. loving and laughing are near impossible when heroin is your best friend ...your only true love ...your obsession.
Although some of you have taken heroin before and I haven't, I think it's unfair and subjective to promote this fiercely one-sided view that everyone that tries it WILL, inevitably, end up the same way.
Like I say, I cannot talk from experience, and I'm fully aware that those that have been there personally know more about the drug than I do, however it is still a fact that some people try it and don't get addicted, even if they are in the minority.
Also, there do exist several people who are content to use smack only occasionally.
These possibilities haven't been mentioned, and I don't think we're painting a full, honest picture of heroin.
I'm not saying that heroin is a safe drug, I have read your testimonials with faith and dread, and I respect that it does, very often, too often, ruin people's lives irrevocably.
But I find it offensive when people say, "You WILL die from it, you WILL end up a no-hope junkie, there's nothing you can do about it."
You can't presume that everyone will end up the same, everyone is different.
What do you reckon, do I have a point or do I not have a clue ?
Let me know,
DX