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Work supervision- so scared- I'm worse off
Invisible_me
Posts: 476 Listening Ear
in Work & Study
Hi..
So my manager is calling me tomorrow to have a supervision with me- last "proper supervision" was in April before i even spoke to his manager and spoke about the struggles/adjustments made. We've had like 'informal chats/check ins etc. His been meaning to do it f2f these 2 weeks but been shirt staffed or his been the lead on duty so now its phone on non work day.
I feel so scared! I feel generally shifts from what they've seen have got worse, downhill!! - im walking out, had a "overwhelmed moment at work and manager saw", having to be on timeout, not doing solo individual session. But from my end I'm feeling less exhausted, drained after shift and 'enjoying the settled moments' which i wasn't before from all the masking!
Whereas before i spoke to his manager I was doing sessions individually, they didbt hsve to 'bother' like they'll just give me the 1st session, 2nd session now thryre giving it to the wider team and I'm doing nothing. I feel embarrased bad like the rest of the team are dealing with delivery/day whereas I'm on timeout or doing admin which isn't my job.
Scared how supervision will go because if this, I'll probably be so shut down as well so won't vocalised this. I'll also feel scared for vocalising anything because he will thrm record it and I domt want it recorded officially!!
Also order duties like being in reception, doing voicemail, making referalls, info sharing that if i had to do this I'd be lost as to what to do, less confident! But then I guess others are permanent, full time and I'm sessional 1 day a week so its goingbto be harder...
I feel like such a failure!! 😒
So my manager is calling me tomorrow to have a supervision with me- last "proper supervision" was in April before i even spoke to his manager and spoke about the struggles/adjustments made. We've had like 'informal chats/check ins etc. His been meaning to do it f2f these 2 weeks but been shirt staffed or his been the lead on duty so now its phone on non work day.
I feel so scared! I feel generally shifts from what they've seen have got worse, downhill!! - im walking out, had a "overwhelmed moment at work and manager saw", having to be on timeout, not doing solo individual session. But from my end I'm feeling less exhausted, drained after shift and 'enjoying the settled moments' which i wasn't before from all the masking!
Whereas before i spoke to his manager I was doing sessions individually, they didbt hsve to 'bother' like they'll just give me the 1st session, 2nd session now thryre giving it to the wider team and I'm doing nothing. I feel embarrased bad like the rest of the team are dealing with delivery/day whereas I'm on timeout or doing admin which isn't my job.
Scared how supervision will go because if this, I'll probably be so shut down as well so won't vocalised this. I'll also feel scared for vocalising anything because he will thrm record it and I domt want it recorded officially!!
Also order duties like being in reception, doing voicemail, making referalls, info sharing that if i had to do this I'd be lost as to what to do, less confident! But then I guess others are permanent, full time and I'm sessional 1 day a week so its goingbto be harder...
I feel like such a failure!! 😒
1
Comments
It started off okay, we had a discussion around music and he said they'll consider quieter, no word music but expressed i fekt bad as this means a whole change for everyone else- he did reassure though a bit.
After then, I was wrapped up completely in duvet he kept saying he couldn't hear me..
He notified me of a service change that's goibg to have a massive impact on me, I expressed its goingbto to impact me abd nervous on it he just said "okays cool"... yeah so. Leave me pondering and worrying me over This!
He said i need to action the checklist and I explained it need it broken down and explained how, who, what, when and he said "okay in will support then, I guess" but could tell he wasn't to impressed. I even said how I'd because then I'm like " what do i do, how, who do i ask, when, what do I say, what will they say etc..
At end i said how I feel like I'm not doing much work and am mich worth and be just "okay cool, I'm ending supervision now". What the hell?? So yeah, is he agreeing to that then or is it a genuine case if the signal playing up which could he.
But he never brought up or spoke to me about any of the other adjustments, recent difficukt shifts or that incident that happened with staff other than the email response he said.
I domt even know yet if I'm in this thurs, no one has confirmed for me. Ive swnt an email and asked a question on if there's a change in how day will run because on the rota they've got a workshop planned and dunno how this affects service and I don't like chabges.