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Felt upset during my shift

Creativeboy23Creativeboy23 Posts: 271 The Mix Regular
edited November 12 in Health & Wellbeing

Hello.

A management staff member told me she was not trying to be mean, but I needed to work faster when visual merchandising in the men’s aisle when I was the only employee assigned to that area, and it was a detail-oriented duty. Her comment felt very personal. I felt disappointment, hurt, and upset. I felt pressured to work fast, which made me question how to do it. I lost confidence in how I have been working in the area and working my other shifts. I thought I was not a good employee; my manager would say the same thing, and they would eventually look for another to replace me if I could not meet their demand.

I know the thoughts are not accurate, though. I am a good employee because I do the duties I am asked to do, and my manager was impressed with my visual merchandising skills. Needing to improve does not make me a bad employee; her feedback was about my performance, so it was not personal, even though it felt that way. My manager would be unlikely to say the same thing because I have already been told. Despite how it made me think and feel, I listened to and acted on the feedback.

However, it is entirely valid for me to feel my feelings. The staff member could have considered how difficult it is for me to manage my workload independently and that I am a new employee. It is also not realistic to expect me to work fast independently, although I made the effort to try to work fast. I did my best which is all I can do.

I want to speak to management about it, but I do not know how to do so because it is a work situation.

Post edited by Creativeboy23 on

Comments

  • AzzimanAzziman Moderator, Community Champion Posts: 2,087 Boards Champion
    Hey @Creativeboy23, thank you for sharing your experience with us. I can hear how you aren't happy with the feedback you received from a management staff member. It sounds like you've reflected on the advice received, and it's good to hear that you have self-confidence in your ability as an employee. You mention that you work well, and that your manager is impressed with your skills, which is a great compliment! However, you also mention that you feel like that you're doing your best, so this feedback might not feel fair.

    It's good to hear that you've considered what to do about this. Have you spoken to your manager about this? It's a good example of what to talk to a manager about - they can help you to figure out if the feedback is fair, reassure you that it's not a reflection of your ability, and perhaps provide some guidance on things they've done to improve in that respect. They also might be able to follow up the issue - if visual merchandising needs more support, perhaps someone else could help you if you're already working at top speed?

    How would you feel about speaking to your manager about this? Is there someone else at work that you think could provide some useful guidance on this feedback? We're here to support you <3
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  • Creativeboy23Creativeboy23 Posts: 271 The Mix Regular
    edited November 13


    Hello @Azziman.

    I am planning to speak to my manager. I feel okay about it. It was not the manager who given the feedback. It was another colleague from the management. They do not need to help me to figure out if the feedback is fair. It is unfair because I am the only male employee working in the male aisle which makes it hard to work at top speed which I do not feel was considered in your response. I just listened to and acted on the feedback so I am not dismissing what a colleague has to say. I feel that the situation has not been seen from my perspective enough in your response. It as if the situation is being seen as me being incorrect about the criticism being unjust and that I should be able to work fast. It is unlikely that your support was meant to come across in that way and you wanted to advise me on how to resolve my situation, but it is how it felt for me.

    It is possible they probably were considering that visual merchandising at a fast pace can increase sales so they wanted me to work fast, forgetting to consider the situation from my viewpoint. They need to consider, though, how it must feel for me having to manage the men's aisles independently especially when I am a new employee. It is going to take time to pick the skill.

    I felt the emphasis was on the positives, with inadequate acknowledgement of my feelings. It is likely, though, that you were saying that you can hear how I am unhappy with the feedback I received to validate my feelings, but I anticipated more of a response. Then, I viewed that as most of the emphasis being placed on the good things, making me think I received little validation.

    However, I felt disappointed and slightly unheard, but I know that you would not have intended to make me feel these feelings and wanted to be helpful.

  • AzzimanAzziman Moderator, Community Champion Posts: 2,087 Boards Champion
    Hey @Creativeboy23 - we do try our best here to support you and hear what you have to say, but thank you for being honest if the reply you received wasn't what you hoped. My response intended to acknowledge that your feelings are valid about this feedback, and that speaking to your manager is a good idea in this type of situation. It sounds like you're planning to do that, so I hope that they can be helpful when you get to discuss this with them.
    FAQ | How to report a post | How to report spam
    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.
  • Creativeboy23Creativeboy23 Posts: 271 The Mix Regular

    Hello @Azziman.

    I know it was intended to come across the way it did but it just felt that way for me.

    I did speak to the manager about it, and she said that the colleague did not put her feedback across in the best way. The chat did not make any difference. The colleague’s comment still affected me, putting me under pressure when working on the men’s aisle, particular last Sunday. I finished my shift feeling very low. I had to talk to a crisis service and we planned together to try talk to the manager.
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