(TW: discussion of racism) I’m ashamed to be a part of my family

BillieTheBot

[deleted]

Faolan

All of this is 10000% valid. I’m sorry you’re having to put up with this but well done for recognising it and rejecting their racism, that’s not easy and especially when it’s coming from family .

Some of my family are racist too. It drives me mad. It’s so annoying because as a community of travellers we receive a lot of abuse and my family are very quick to call it out when people use slurs or stereotypes against us. Like when we’re called “pikeys” .. but then they go on and do the exact same thing to other people clearly not realising it’s the same cycle of ignorance and hurt 🤦🏼‍♂️

It’s so sad that this is normalised in so many families but the fact that we are aware of it and talking about it/calling it out is breaking the cycle. And everytime we recognise that what they’re saying is wrong , we are distancing ourselves from their views and building our own values.

Someday we will have our freedom to choose our own circle but for now I guess we can just be proud not being like them.

You’re not going to end up like them, you’ve already recognised that it’s wrong💚

sinead276

Just wanted to say similar to the reply above. it can be hard when the people we are essentially closest to and spend significant time around make comments like this.

but ultimately the fact you recognise the offence such statements can have and are willing to call it out shows that you aren't like those members of your family at all. Even from just that post you made, it's fairly clear to me that your personal values and beliefs don't align with the ones of your family members who are making such comments - and for that keep going!!!!!!

As hard as it can be, as much as we educate people on why such remarks are hurtful, some people refuse to accept it as such. But keep doing what you're doing and i'm sure you won't be like them - even in 10, 20, 50 years time

Hope you're doing okay today and sending hugs
Sinead

leyla26

Hi there,

I think sometimes being so self-aware comes with a whole host of responsibilities that a lot of people don't necessarily have, and it's a hard burden to bear. I have lots of friends who have complained about their family doing some or all of these but they woukdn;t consider cutting them off, whereas I have similar thoughts to you. There's absolutely no correct answer and everyone will have different opinions on what the best action would be, whatever you decide on should be best for you but still be in line with your values and I know you'll find a way to find that balance. It might be something that changes over time too, you might not have the courage right now and it might come in time along with practicalities like money etc. Well done for sticking to your values regardless