Think I messed up

Rose113

On the verge of tears, been talking to this guy on TikTok who has been pretty much suicidal for a good few months. At first it was a one off and I checked in with him and then over time it started to be more frequent which I don’t mind supporting people. I kinda blame myself for this part but I used to say “I’m just doing something but I’ll reply asap” but then if he would say he was gonna hurt himself I would help him which I think he started to twig that was the only way her would get my attention even if I was busy.

Last night he was in such a bad place and I spent hours trying to keep him safe and stuff and then I spoke to my other friend who got in contact with him and told him to not talk to me because I’m young and for him to talk to her and now I’m so fucking scared that he’s gonna do something stupid 😭

I’m not gonna be able to get through next class without crying which then questions will be asked and I’ll have to tell a teacher and I’m too scared to

Lucy_21

I messaged you hon, I can help you sort this if you like just message me💖 xx

Azziman

Hey @Rose113, just wanted to check in on how you're doing? I'm sorry to hear about your situation, it sounds like it's been stressful for you. Thank you for looking out for other people, it's really kind of you to support someone who's feeling suicidal. That being said, it sounds like spending hours trying to keep someone safe would have been stressful for you.

It's good to hear that you've got friends looking out for your wellbeing. Supporting someone who feels suicidal is quite emotionally challenging, and your friend offering to take over helps to share that load. I know that that kind of interaction is naturally quite emotionally engaging, so I hear how you're scared of what might happen to them.

But remember, your friend is speaking to them so they're not left alone. And importantly, while it's kind to support someone going through a difficult time, that doesn't make you responsible for how they feel. You don't have to carry this burden by yourself.

To that end, it might be helpful to talk to your friend about how you feel, since they are already aware of the situation. Sharing your emotions with each other can help so that you're not feeling isolated with this experience, and can support each other.

Your support and kindness for this person is amazing - please don't let that go! You're an amazing person for doing all this. But also, remember to look after yourself too

I'll include some support links below in case they're helpful:
- The Mix - call 0808 808 4994; use the chat (https://www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-advisors); or use the Crisis Messenger (https://www.themix.org.uk/get-support/speak-to-our-team/crisis-messenger)
- Samaritans - call 116 123; or use the Live Chat (http://chat.samaritans.org/)