TW maybe

ellie2000

I [purged] this morning, which I haven't done in 3yrs. I was feeling abit iffy in the head. Is tht the same as SH?

JustV

Morning @ellie2000 just to let you know I edited your post to say 'purged' rather than the method you had there originally. In our guidelines we say:

Community Guidelines wrote:

Eating behaviours
When discussing eating behaviours, it’s okay to say you overeat or restrict, or to share a formal diagnosis. Please avoid discussing specific details, such as:

- Methods of purging

I don't know if this is an disordered eating thing for you or not - so apologies if I've made an undue assumption - but wanted to be on the safe side for other folks reading. (If you don't know what purging is, check out the first two paragraphs of this NHS article)

To answer your question though: self-harm can be quite a broad thing, and depending on your philosophical bend you could make a case for purging being in that category. It might depend more on the reasons you're doing it than the behaviour itself, because context matters.

What do you think the reasons are for why you purge?

ellie2000

@JustV I have a gd diet, I go to the gym, go swimming etc...
Sometimes I wake up thinking that something has happened and then I feel bad about myself, I expected moving would make me feel completely better?
Is this normal feelings everyday?
Good news now I hav ppl across the way, so I dont need to phone samaritans anymore.

Azziman

Hey @ellie2000 - it sounds like you look after your physical health well, which is good to hear And I'm glad to hear that you have support near your home! How do you feel about having them nearby?

Would you be able to explain a bit more about what you think of when you wake up? Why does this make you feel bad? What do you think about the experience?

ellie2000

@JustV @Azziman
apathy, I also feel like I cba b4 a big councilling appointment, why is this?
I hav a lot of issues tht r left over. Shall I just go in start quiet or shall I explode feelings like I used to do with ppl I used to meet n they never returned?

ameliaJayne

@ellie2000 it is totally normal to feel like you can't be bothered before counselling. Sometimes people feel this way because you know that you have to open up about things that have happened and this can be emotionally draining.

It is totally up to you how you approach your counselling sessions. There is no right or wrong way. Maybe just see how you feel on the day and if you feel like exploding your feelings then go for it but if not that is also okay. All you can do is try your best.