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Family and shi**ery (change title if not allowed)

ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 3,883 Community Veteran
I was sitting down. Having local stuff, I started to think of wen ppl. N I started to think about mum n I was thinking do ppl give her 'sh*t intentionally? She vents n I don't no wat do with the information. She tries to help ppl n she get an earful. worry sets in.
I hav to reassure her, stroke her arm. Wen she really worry I feel I hav to find a solution.
Do ppl hav stuff goin on in the background wen the worry bout stuff too?
I can't focus on myself, how do u do tht? Ppl upset her n I just wanna r.i.p them haha
Crazy mad insane
JJLemon18AnonymousToelunarcat522

Comments

  • JJLemon18JJLemon18 Community Champion Posts: 1,876 Extreme Poster
    I'm so very sorry about this <3 I know the feeling, trust me. Literally the whole day today was ruined because my mum had a very bad breakdown because of the way she is treated, though I won't go into detail. I feel so incredibly shitty because of it.

    Its such a painful feeling when your mum is hurting and you would do anything to help her, yet the only thing you can do is listen :/ Just listening to someone's vents can go a long way though. I know your mum really appreciates you being there for her, just like I know my mum appreciates me.

    Anyways, sorry I'm not of much help. Also sorry if I misunderstood your post. Wishing you and your mum all the best! :)
    Believe in me - who believes is you
    AnonymousToe
  • MaisyMaisy Moderator Posts: 583 Incredible Poster
    Hey there,

    Sometimes people are deliberately not nice to others, but other times, it might be accidental, such as they are stressed out with other things going on in their life and are taking the stress out on others instead. Whatever the cause is, it's not nice to be on the receiving end of someone else's problems.

    It sounds like your mum just really wants to help others but perhaps other people aren't ready to help themselves so they take it out on your mum when she was only trying to help. Naturally, your mum will get upset and talk (or vent) to you about it. This is understandably difficult on you too. But I'm sure your mum appreciates you listening to her and trying to help her through things as well. Perhaps, going forward, you can suggest to your mum that if people don't want help, to not take it personally and instead just let them know that she is there to help if they want help. This way, if the other people decide they want your mum's help, they can ask her, and if they don't want her help, they won't ask, so at least they won't be so unkind to your mum.

    It's difficult to focus on yourself when you are trying to help others. Many people feel that they have other stuff going on in the background when they are worrying about something else. It's really hard to see others upset your mum, especially if you feel you can't do much. Maybe you can talk to your mum and suggest she tries to avoid people who haven't been nice to her? You might not be able to do much but if your mum can stay away from those you know haven't been nice to her then it might help to ease some of the stress. As difficult as this is for your mum, your own feelings matter too. We are all here to listen to you if that helps <3
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    ellie2000
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