I keep being in low moods when I want to be more happy

Creativeboy23

Hello all.

I shared that I felt moaned at about my job offer situation with my employment advisor and she did not acknowledge what I said and continued with our appointment. It came across like she distanced herself from my feelings. I felt disappointed. I had thoughts like it was because she is an employment advisor, my dad saying that she probably did not care, he shouted for not asking questions when I was on the phone, my family saying I am so sensitive, people saying I should have prepared questions in advance and that I cannot keep being upset like this. I had a memory of when my uncle and particularly my dad would lecture me about my sensitivity, which made me feel how I felt was not welcomed. I have been offered reassurance about my sensitivity on here but I am still finding it hard to believe the reassurance. I have been feeling others and particularly university staff have expected too much from me when my autism spectrum makes me learn and do things differently.

Maisy

Unfortunately, some employment advisors may stick to focusing on employment issues only, rather than looking at the bigger picture or the individual themselves. Ideally, employment advisors would take your feelings into consideration and it's possible the issue is just with your advisor as there may be others who might understand your feelings better.

Sorry to hear that your dad shouted for not asking questions. It is good to prepare questions in advance but if you haven't spoken to an advisor before then it's difficult to know how the conversation might go and what kind of questions to ask, so it's not necessarily your fault as you didn't know beforehand. The good thing is, at least now you know what to expect and can follow up with any questions you might have.

As for your sensitivity, there really is nothing wrong with 'being sensitive'. I think some neurodivergent people may be more likely to have strong emotions or feel emotions more easily. It doesn't mean that it's wrong though. Even though some of your family members don't understand this about you, there will be others out there who will understand you.

University staff often have great knowledge on their subjects (if we are talking about lecturers) but they might not have such great knowledge on accommodating students needs e.g. autism. This will then come across as they expect too much from you without taking into consideration that you learn and do things differently. I can't remember if I have asked, but does your university have student support? You might be able to get accommodations through them or talk to your lecturers with the support of student services to get your lecturers to understand why you might learn and do things differently.

Creativeboy23

Hello @Maisy.

Thanks. I appreciate your help. I have now realised why she may not have acknowledged my feelings. I am currently in therapy now and have been learning about looking at the bigger picture.

The situation with my dad was just a thought based on him shouting at me in the past about things.

That is a good point you have made about why university staff may have expected too much from me. I am not at university now. I was sharing that the situation has still been affecting me.