Going on a date this weekend - I feel like he's out of my league

Former Member

I'm 27 years old and I'm meeting someone that is 23 years old, a fair bit younger than me. I usually only date same age or older than me, so this really feels off already.
We have hit on quite well and we've been chatting everyday for the past 4 days, he's always the one messaging first and engaging the conversation. Maybe I shouldn't be doing that but this way I know that he's interested? But I can only sense that he would be thinking the same "it's always me texting first"

He's really good looking and he loves social media, meanwhile I'm told I'm good looking but I don't feel that way and the fact of being older makes me also feel worse. He's really fit and skinny, meanwhile I'm more bulky as I play a lot of sports but I'm not mad muscular.

I don't really know what he sees in me that wants to go on a date with, when I look at myself I feel very average and when I look at him he looks just way too good...

He's completely opposite of me I'm dark haired, foreign, darker skinned, he is blond, brittish skinny and tall.

We have so much in common, we like a lot of the same things, despite having different personalities. I just don't want to be naive, should I even go?

Problems are - Low confidence, Age gap and Social Media

The fact that he's also very into social media whilst I'm not...he has lots of pictures and friends and big social media followers, meanwhile I barely have any of that because it doesnt interest me...

MatchaMia

It's very normal to be nervous when trying out new things and being in a new relationship! I think the best thing to say is to trust your gut and how you feel towards him rather than the voices in your head that are putting you down - you deserve more credit and love than you're giving yourself. In terms of age- I think as long as you're comfortable and have discussed what you're both looking for, there is nothing wrong with dating someone younger. I'm sure he has also thought about the gap himself but he seems very engaged and interested, so I don't believe it's something that's putting him off- if the age gap becomes discomforting, perhaps talk about it with him? It may help to get some reassurance With social media, there's nothing wrong at all if you don't like to use it but he does- It shouldn't affect your relationship or reflect your value as a person or partner. At the end of the day, you shouldn't let differences and age get in the way of something that could be beautiful! I hope it goes okay, just remember that if he doesn't see your value for you, he's most definitely not worth being someone you're not!

Azziman

Hey @henry16 - I can hear that you're feeling apprehensive about this date, and like @MatchaMia says, that's natural to some level when you're meeting someone new. It sounds like the conversation has been going well so far, and that you've got lots in common - both great indicators!

We could speculate about how we look, how someone sees us, why someone likes us etc, but it's not really helpful, because what matters more here is that he wants to see you - he messages you, he wants to meet you so presumably does find you attractive and isn't bothered by the age gap. It sounds obvious, but he's dating you, so if he is attracted to you, then I'd accept it And likewise, you're dating him, so you'll go out with him if you're attracted to him!

If he's very into social media and posts a lot because it interests him, and you don't because you aren't interested in it, that's completely fine! You're allowed to like different things, and your self-worth isn't measured by your social media clout. It's not something I'd be worried about.

I hope the date goes well, and that you both have a great time together - enjoy the moment!

Former Member

@henry16 It's natural to have these kinds of thoughts and concerns when considering dating someone who is a bit younger and appears different from you. However, it's important not to let these factors hold you back from potentially forming a meaningful connection. Ultimately, whether or not to go on a date with him depends on how you feel about him and the potential for a connection. If you're enjoying your conversations and there's mutual interest, it could be worth giving it a chance.