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Self-deception
Former Member
Believer in PlutoPosts: 131 The Mix Convert
I think that as humans we are the best liars. And we're really good at lying to ourselves. I am a liar unto myself.
I project that I'm doing so great and so well until I sit alone with my thoughts. With my thoughts, I am honest and vulnerable in such an uncomfortable way that it hurts. I hate being alone and so I fill myself with everything I can, I try to slow down but then it feels too slow. I've come a long way.
Breath in and out
I'm gonna be okay.
(I'm sorry for posting so much)
I project that I'm doing so great and so well until I sit alone with my thoughts. With my thoughts, I am honest and vulnerable in such an uncomfortable way that it hurts. I hate being alone and so I fill myself with everything I can, I try to slow down but then it feels too slow. I've come a long way.
Breath in and out
I'm gonna be okay.
(I'm sorry for posting so much)
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Comments
I'm always here if you need someone to talk to, and so is the community! Take care!
There is a place for sitting alone with thoughts (mindfulness being a good example), but as @libbystrawberry said, there is the risk of overthinking. This is where self-compassion is really important. Acknowledging that vulnerability and pain, allowing yourself to feel those emotions (after all, we're all human, and we're allowed to feel!), and learning to be kind to yourself - all really important practices that help you to sit alone with your thoughts easier. And remembering that you all have value - inherently; to family, friends and loved ones; and as part of our community.
Sometimes getting through that discomfort of acknowledging the truth of your feelings may help you to process your emotions in a healthier way where it's not all bottled up and destructive. I've gotten a lot better these couples years at spending time with myself but I've realised too much alone time can make me feel lonely and zone into my own thoughts that I don't realise I'm removing myself from everyone. I think it's been helpful (at least for me) to go somewhere quiet and listen to music or journal to process my own feelings, but somedays I put on a podcast where people talk about similar anxieties I may be overthinking about, just so my own voice in my head has grounding company, that way I'm not stuck in my thoughts and instead, considering different perspectives- this may also help you, I hope, if you're not yet ready to be vulnerable with friends and family or a person.
The discomfort of facing ourselves can be scary and that's why we want to speed up the 'healing' process but it's something you just can't rush. Please be patient with yourself, your feelings deserve to be felt and heard. It's certainly not something to apologise for! You're strong in your vulnerability despite its discomforts and you'll be okay.
Sometimes I can find it helpful but not always for me I guess, I know Headspace is a brilliant app to use especially if you struggle with sleep and sleep patterns too.
I used to have a meditation app too, I think It's a hit and miss for me sometimes I'm not really sure why- I think maybe it just depends on how willing you are to push yourself to do it properly on a day. I wish the apps that help your mental health like meditation were free though- a lot of their benefits are often a premium privilege.
They are most of the time and that's what I hate as well. It's like something that should be accessible to those who need is behind a paywall and it's sad really. Or you have a free trial and then it ends and costs you lots of money to keep the app. I only Headspace on Youtube as it's free, there are limited videos but the videos help me though in a way. I find it hard to focus tho doing it lol
Yeah I agree. There are other methods to help anxiety, overthinking, sleeping and etc, but it really depends on person to person and because some of them take the form of apps or are very instructive, they appear superficial which is incompatible to our natural nature as humans.