fucked up

libbystrawberry

guys ive fucked up totally

JJLemon18

Hey @libbystrawberry do you want to tell us more about what happened? We're here to listen. Sending hugs!

JustV

@libbystrawberry just a heads up I moved this over to Health & Wellbeing after seeing the tags you added to the post. As @JJLemon18 said, what happened?

yana

@libbystrawberry we're all here if u wanna talk abt what happened

libbystrawberry

@xee ik thxxx

libbystrawberry

@xee i told someone some personal things abt me and u know cant take it back, i regret it this is why i try to not tell ppl to much stuff bcz they'll either use it against me or ill just feel sooo exposed esp when its in person. like i dont mind talking abt it onlin ebut phsically was a no no idkkkkkk whyyyy i did it

yana

@libbystrawberry ohhh i totallyyy get that, the amount of times i've done that is insane. i used to feel that strong regret after every time i would open up to anyone and it's so shitty. and i get what u mean about feeling exposed, it's hard to be vulnerable sometimes. just try to take small steps and not be too hard on urself are there any particular people u know u can talk to who won't use it against u? like a close friend? maybe start with them and just try to slowly ease urself into it?

libbystrawberry

Xee wrote: »

@libbystrawberry ohhh i totallyyy get that, the amount of times i've done that is insane. i used to feel that strong regret after every time i would open up to anyone and it's so shitty. and i get what u mean about feeling exposed, it's hard to be vulnerable sometimes. just try to take small steps and not be too hard on urself are there any particular people u know u can talk to who won't use it against u? like a close friend? maybe start with them and just try to slowly ease urself into it?

i wouldnt really know where to start with them as i dont rlly talk to them abt my mental health or suicidal feeling or stuff like that. generall theyd think im a pretty 'happy' person i think. i spoke to my hoy and boy the feeling s im feeling now:crazy regret, stupidity, anger,exposed

yana

@libbystrawberry did ur hoy help and offer some support? why do u feel angry?

libbystrawberry

put me on ptp ( positive thought process) turn negative thoughts to positive ones, had a meeting w/ my mum made me feel extra exposed and embarrassed. angry for being so fricking stupid

yana

@libbystrawberry was the meeting useful at all? idk what ur mum is like but for me the moment i first opened up to a teacher and they called my mum was extremely difficult but it was the start of a lot of support for me but pls remember u aren't stupid, u did nothing stupid by opening up, u just wanted support and that's ok and u should be proud of urself for going and seeking that even if things didn't end up the way u wanted

libbystrawberry

i mean after she found out stuff abt me and so did the teachers. again i felt exposed

libbystrawberry

@xee ive never shared that much abt me to a person irl like that b4. but ig my mum is being a bit nicer one thing tho she thinks my suicidal feelings come from me reading books but i dont get how thats possible. the teachers in the meeting thought i was being harsh on my mum( maybe i was who knows), but i just didnt knw how to make them undersstand how im feeling when tbh it doesnt properly make sense to me . is it just me but i find it kinda intimidatng when everyone in the room is looking at me expecting answers idk how the hell to give

yana

@libbystrawberry i'm glad to hear ur mum is being nicer despite the fact she thinks this is related to books (i don't get how that makes sense either tbh). maybe they interpreted what u were saying in a different way but you should still be proud of urself for trying to make them understabd, it's not easy especially as u said when you're in this room and everyone else is looking at you expecting answers you don't have. ur doing really well

ebyrne556

Hey @libbystrawberry just checking on how ur feeling and how things have been the last couple days.We are really proud of u and sending hugs

ellie2000

@libbystrawberry wen u say u 'f'd up' to people, it's really not tht bad.
Just b u 😊

Azziman

Hey @libbystrawberry, just wanted to pick up from earlier. How have you been doing the last few days? I hear that you're finding it a difficult situation. It's hard to open up to people, because we feel vulnerable and frightened. But it's a good thing to do, because you don't have to carry this burden on your shoulders alone. Whether its people in your real life, or you want to share it with us here, you have people to listen to you and support you.

I can understand that it can feel confusing when you're trying to figure all this out, and I'd imagine that your mum might feel the same way. You might not get an answer today or tomorrow, but take your time to learn about how you feel and make sense of things. The right answer isn't always the quickest solution, but often a far better outcome. Doing your best is the best that any of us can do, and anyone can expect from you, so keep doing that and you'll be on the right track