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I have been struggling recently

TheNightmareTheNightmare Posts: 2,587 Boards Guru
in Home, Law & Money
I have been feeling like Im just like a failure and I have no purpose. I think the options are to work 9 to 5 for the rest of my life in a job I dont like or the other option is to be on the dole which is worse. Im worried about being broke either way. This is for the future and now like I'm not in the best situation now but I just dont want to get a job and not like it. I feel like I might be unemployed on the dole for a long time or maybe all my life which is worse considering I'm fully capable of working physically and mentally. I think it's just motivation and worries. I do want to earn my own money, I don't want to sit at home all my life with benefits, I think would work in a job thats not ideal if I desperately needed an income, I'm worried it might come to that though where I'm just stuck in jobs I dont like just to make a living and just be stuck broke all my life. Short term I think id be ok if I knew I would be happy and comfortable with money at some point with a career or income I'm happy with.

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Community Champion Posts: 1,294 Wise Owl
    Hello, I hope you're doing ok today :) Most of what I'm gonna ramble abtout is stuff I've already said to you lol but I'll try my best not to repeat myself.

    I saw this thing a few weeks ago which was talking about how the purpose of life is to learn. And while that does kinda seem like a boring purpose if you think about it from like a much more zoomed out perspective you'll kinda see where I'm coming from. I'm shit at explaining it so here's a website I found which I think explains it really well :)
    www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/tech-happy-life/202010/what-is-the-purpose-life

    I really don't have much advice related to jobs or anything so i'm sorry about that but what I can say if that u should try your best to remind urself of the good things you've done and all the accomplishments you've made! Because feeling like a failure sucks and sure you've messed some things up but that doesn't mean you've failed. Try to focus on the good just as much as if not more than the bad. I know it's a lot easier said than done but when you do start to see the positives more clearly it'll make a difference!

    Also worrying about the future is something I do a lot too even though I'm a lot younger than u and prob shouldn't be worrying about it at all lol but try your best to focus on the present! I know u can't exactly just pretend the future doesn't exist but just remember that life never goes as planned so even if u had everything planned and put together it might not go that way. There was this metaphor @JJLemon18 used (sorry I keep bringing ur metaphor up lol) and I really liked it. Basically think of ur life as a cookie. Right now you're worrying about how the cookie is gonna go all mouldy (i.e. your life is gonna go all bad, you'll be broke, etc) instead of just enjoying the cookie in the present.

    Idk if any of my ramble has been helpful lol but I hope you're doing ok, please don't be too hard on urself! Everyone makes mistakes, it doesn't make u a failure <3
  • TheNightmareTheNightmare Posts: 2,587 Boards Guru
    Xee wrote: »
    Hello, I hope you're doing ok today :) Most of what I'm gonna ramble abtout is stuff I've already said to you lol but I'll try my best not to repeat myself.

    I saw this thing a few weeks ago which was talking about how the purpose of life is to learn. And while that does kinda seem like a boring purpose if you think about it from like a much more zoomed out perspective you'll kinda see where I'm coming from. I'm shit at explaining it so here's a website I found which I think explains it really well :)
    www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/tech-happy-life/202010/what-is-the-purpose-life

    I really don't have much advice related to jobs or anything so i'm sorry about that but what I can say if that u should try your best to remind urself of the good things you've done and all the accomplishments you've made! Because feeling like a failure sucks and sure you've messed some things up but that doesn't mean you've failed. Try to focus on the good just as much as if not more than the bad. I know it's a lot easier said than done but when you do start to see the positives more clearly it'll make a difference!

    Also worrying about the future is something I do a lot too even though I'm a lot younger than u and prob shouldn't be worrying about it at all lol but try your best to focus on the present! I know u can't exactly just pretend the future doesn't exist but just remember that life never goes as planned so even if u had everything planned and put together it might not go that way. There was this metaphor @JJLemon18 used (sorry I keep bringing ur metaphor up lol) and I really liked it. Basically think of ur life as a cookie. Right now you're worrying about how the cookie is gonna go all mouldy (i.e. your life is gonna go all bad, you'll be broke, etc) instead of just enjoying the cookie in the present.

    Idk if any of my ramble has been helpful lol but I hope you're doing ok, please don't be too hard on urself! Everyone makes mistakes, it doesn't make u a failure <3

    @Xee Hi, I appreciate your advice
  • ebyrne556ebyrne556 Moderator Posts: 1,199 Wise Owl
    Hey @FordRanger Just checking in on you this morning to see how ur doing and feeling about things at the minute? @Xee has already covered a lot of what id say its always lovely 2 c how supportive u all r of eachother so thank u <3 I can understand about the worry’s about the future, and i know it can be hard to think about the present but try and mabye even just take it one day at a time and u could just check in with yourself at the end of each day and c how ur feeling about things now. Im also hearing that you’re worried about being stuck in the same 9-5 job and hating Have you spoken to anyone about your worries.Mabye theirs the opportunity to try something new eg a trail shift or some sort of work experience somewhere different. The most important thing is that ur trying and thats a great accomplishment in itself. Hope this sort of makes sense.Take care we r all rooting for u.
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  • Laura_tigger82Laura_tigger82 Moderator Posts: 5,307 Part of The Furniture
    We are all here for you @FordRanger :)
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  • TheNightmareTheNightmare Posts: 2,587 Boards Guru
    ebyrne556 wrote: »
    Hey @FordRanger Just checking in on you this morning to see how ur doing and feeling about things at the minute? @Xee has already covered a lot of what id say its always lovely 2 c how supportive u all r of eachother so thank u <3 I can understand about the worry’s about the future, and i know it can be hard to think about the present but try and mabye even just take it one day at a time and u could just check in with yourself at the end of each day and c how ur feeling about things now. Im also hearing that you’re worried about being stuck in the same 9-5 job and hating Have you spoken to anyone about your worries.Mabye theirs the opportunity to try something new eg a trail shift or some sort of work experience somewhere different. The most important thing is that ur trying and thats a great accomplishment in itself. Hope this sort of makes sense.Take care we r all rooting for u.

    @ebyrne556
    Hi I'm still worried but think I am a bit better. I'm just worried each time I try I'll just feel worse coz if a job doesn't work out etc
  • Laura_tigger82Laura_tigger82 Moderator Posts: 5,307 Part of The Furniture
    That sounds really difficult @FordRanger :/ What about if you find a role that does work out though - what does working out/not working out look like for you? :)
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  • TheNightmareTheNightmare Posts: 2,587 Boards Guru
    Laura_tigger82 wrote: »
    That sounds really difficult @FordRanger :/ What about if you find a role that does work out though - what does working out/not working out look like for you? :)

    @Laura_tigger82 yh thats good then but I feel like it's going to be hard
  • Laura_tigger82Laura_tigger82 Moderator Posts: 5,307 Part of The Furniture
    I hear you @FordRanger. Nothing takes away from the fact that it could be a really difficult journey for you. However, we are here for you and we believe in you that you can do and get through the difficult things. How have things been for you more recently? :)
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  • TheNightmareTheNightmare Posts: 2,587 Boards Guru
    edited July 2023
    Laura_tigger82 wrote: »
    I hear you @FordRanger. Nothing takes away from the fact that it could be a really difficult journey for you. However, we are here for you and we believe in you that you can do and get through the difficult things. How have things been for you more recently? :)

    @Laura_tigger82 yh, things don't seem to be getting any better. I'm still struggling like I think it's most if not all days now. I was just going to come on to post on the "I need a hug" thread about it. I just don’t know what to do anymore
    Post edited by TheNightmare on
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