Post of The Month

Laura_tigger82

Hello everyone!

Happy May. I hope the sun is shining for you as it is for me here. The first of May can only mean one thing and that's the new post-of-the-month nominations. I hope you are all well.

I would, firstly, like to say thank you to everyone who has posted this month or taken the time to respond to and interact with someone else's post.

We appreciate you all. You really are the people who make The Mix's community the supportive and friendly space it is

Now I would like you to, please, select your favourite nomination from this month.

The nominations are:

1. @Xee - On preparing myself for an appointment

@SpaceOtter I feel this, I used to relate to pretty much everything you've just said. But I haven't self harmed in almost a year now! It does get better, I promise you. I know everyone says 'it'll get better one day blah blah blah' and you're like 'ok well one day yeah but right now I'm really struggling' and I get that but honestly you just have to keep trying your best and looking forward to the future. Be kind to yourself as much as you can be. I'm really proud of you, honestly you're doing so much better than you realise! Just keep going, take life day by day. And don't apologise for ranting! We're all here for you

Sending hugs

2. @spoon - On retaking the year or sticking it out

Hi @SpaceOtter, how are you feeling now?

It sounds like you have two options, either continue the year or retake it. I think you're capable of doing well which ever option you choose, but if you end up retaking the year, there's no shame in it. If anything, it gives you a step ahead as you already know what to expect. It's a fresh start and you could spend your time doing self care before you start. I think there's so much pressure in education to move on and worrying if your taking too long, people forget that we shouldn't rush and it's never too late. I also understand if you want to continue the year to get it over and done with, I think I would do the same.

Assignments can be tricky to get started on, speaking as a major procrastinator, and like you said, people have different ways of focusing on it such as music or planning. However, it sounds like your way of focusing is having someone with you, and that is not silly at all! If it helps you get it done than that's all that matters, I'd argue it isn't much different from music or planning because they all have the same goal, focus. There is no shame.

Well done for managing two years! That takes a lot of strength. Self harm urges are the worst, so don't feel bad because you relapsed. Please do tell someone you have relapsed though, I know you say your safe, but self harm is never safe, not just physically but also mentally and there's always a risk of it escalating. It might not feel like it is you your hurting, but you know it is. They may be able to give advice, such as how to take care of yourself after doing it and ways to prevent it. I found that one thing that helped me was drawing and scribbling on my arm, I think it's the slight pressure from the pen on my skin. I know it's not the same thing, but maybe that could help you? I doubt the metal health professional will be mad, hopefully he'll be understanding because going without a relapse is hard and it was such a long time.

You are not lazy or pathetic, your brain just works a little differently and that's not your fault. I'm sure your tutor wants to help you. Anxiety is a bitch, so well done for having more control. Progress isn't black and white, sometimes some aspects get worse and some get better, but the better is something to be proud of and the worse is something you can improve on and you don't have to do that alone.

Lectures sound hard to sit through. Are your lectures filmed at all? Or are you allowed to film your lectures? That way you can go through it at your own pace and come back to certain parts of it in a more comfortable environment.

Please remember that you wellbeing comes first so do what feels best. You might not know straight away but I'm sure you will. Sometimes you just have to take a risk. Whatever decision you make, please remember that the grass always looks greener at the other side and there's always a way of going forward. I believe in you

3. @Millie2787 - Autism Acceptance Month

I’ve been having a big think and we’ll hear goes nothing . Yesterday marked the start of Autism awareness month and today autism awareness day ,something that is very close to my heart indeed.

I was diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder when I was 18 , I am now 21. It’s not uncommon for girls and women to be diagnosed in later life , there’s many statistics that support the fact that boys are 3 times more likely to get a diagnosis than girls. Why that is , who knows .

But one thing I did want to challenge and to show is that autism doesn’t hold be back in any way whatsoever, I have chaired a Conference and spoke Infront of hundreds of people about my caring experiences, I have been to London where I was chief navigator of the tubes and anyone who has been to London knows that not an easy task.

I have started my nursing degree which involved me moving out of my family home and beginning to live independently, which don’t get me wrong has is to challenge( I still text mum asking is certain things can be washed together or put in the tumble dryer 🤣) and I continue on a daily basis to challenge the misconceptions around autism .

My autism doesn’t hold me back it just means I view the world differently to everyone else and I hope that along with me and any other autistic individuals that you know … that you continue to accept us for who we are that I know every single one of you here already does 🫂

One last thing I wanted to share with you all is the Advert vanish recently aired on channel 4 , Showing the comfort of familiar clothing and focusing specifically on female ASD

4. @Past User - The mix show and tell 👀

I thought a mix show and tell would be a good idea, people can share what there most prized or most favourite thing is and we could all have fun seeing what other people's are

5. @Past User On all mod and user chat

@mike oki, i can imagine u all just huddling now lmao

6. @SpaceOtter - A friendly kind of sadness

Hi I hope youre ok.

I dont know how much of this makes sense, im not even sure if i want it to.

Sometimes i think posting here is like throwing a pebble in a river. The current corrects itself but just for a few seconds i changed it, i made a ripple. I made a change in the river for a few seconds. When i let out my thoughts for a few seconds i feel lighter. I have the ability to change things and one day my relief will last longer than a few seconds.

Sometimes i think of my thoughts and feelings as people, figures who appear when feelings are intense, good and bad feelings. I used to feel my really bad thoughts following me. They never left but i grew fond of their company. I didnt turn to them when i was sad but instead when i felt overwhelmingly broken inside. Id imagine looking over at them and theyd smile back softly. And in that moment it felt like we both knew what i had to do. How to make it stop.
I dont imagine seeing them anymore anymore.

I used to imagine happiness as a person too. Theyd hug me tight. Happiness still visits frequently and i see them and i smile but they dont hug me anymore. They stand beside me.

My happiness no longer feels like happines. Instead the sadness in me just aches in my chest. I smile but it feels sad. But in a way i like the weird achy sadness, its a friendly type of sadness. For now that friendly achy sadness is my happiness.

I always feel sad. Ive felt sad for a long time before but back then things felt grey. They dont feel grey this time. Its a warm kind of sadness. I know that probably doesnt make sense. Its like that sadness you feel when watching a sad moive, its intense and raw in the moment and you feel the tears run down your face, you hug yourself tight around the middle and you feel like youre going to fall apart.

In the past i havent felt real when things got bad. I was watching the world through a window.

Ive never felt so connected to life before. Im here. And the world around me is loud and bright. Its so real it hurts. And people care about me and i care about them. I just feel so sad.

I like to doodle,to go on long walks and listen to music. They still make me sad but i remind myself one day ill listen to this song or read this book and ill smile brightly and it wont be a sad smile.

Good days will come. I know that. Healing takes time. Its just tiring and lonely feeling so sad. But it will pass.

Everything feels sad right now. I dont think theres anything i could do other than to ride it out. Im doing good things and talking to good people.

Im sorry for rambling so much. I just wanted to throw a pebble in the river. I wanted to remember things can change. Because one day ill read this post back and ill smile and ill imagine giving my past self a hug and telling them things will change.

I doubt i made sense. And it was an overdramatic weird ramble. But for three seconds i felt ok.

I wish you all the best. Sending hugs. Look after yourself
Happy (insert day) !

Soo many great nominations this month - it brightened up my day to see how many nominations we have had this month and to have the honour to post these. Good luck choosing everyone

Millie2787

Awww thank you to whoever nominated mine 💚

JJLemon18

Oh that's a lot haha, I wish I could vote for more than one...

Amy22

Same here, they are all winners in my mind

Aoife

So lovely to see all the nominations! Thank you for all of you lovely support to each other

Laura_tigger82

All winners in my mind too!

Laura_tigger82

Well done to everyone - I truly really enjoyed posting the post of the month this month. All your nominations made it more than worth it. Seeing all the incredible community members we have received the recognition they deserve was one in a million too.

However, of course, there can only be one winner this month (though you are all secretly winners in my eyes!)... Drum roll, please!!

The winner of the post of the month this month was @Millie2787 with Autism Acceptance Month - as a fellow autistic myself, I am especially proud. Thank you Millie and congratulations

JJLemon18

Congratulations @Millie2787 for winning post of the month!!
And congrats to everyone else too!

Amy22

Congrats to everyone and to @Millie2787 I'm very proud of you all

kaii

Congrats to @Millie2787 winning post of the month! Well done to all the nominees too, you're all amazing!