'Adulting'

Gemma · April 2023

Hey everyone,

How are your bank holiday weekends going? It was lovely and sunny in London yesterday and I went to an Ed Sheeran pop-up to listen to his new album in the sun

Has anyone got up to anything nice?

Just starting a new thread on here as I had a few questions for you all...

- What is something that you wish you'd have known about being an adult/young adult?
- Is there something you wish you had learnt more about when you were younger to help you 'be good at adulting'?
- As a child, what did you think would be awesome about growing up but isn't as awesome as you thought it would be?

For me, I have found the money management that comes with being an adult quite tough at times and I wish I'd learnt more about how to budget, save, and invest.

I'm also not a great cook and would probably be a better one if I had learnt more about how to make quick but healthy meals.

We're going to be starting an 'adulting series' on our social media channels covering various different topics from money (adult admin; budgeting; food shopping), to health (navigating services; advocating for yourself), actions (DIY; cooking; how to vote), work/home (careers thinking; renting; moving house), looking after youself (coping with change; time management; wellbeing strategies), and more.

So we'd like to hear your thoughts too on what 'good adulting' means to you and things you wish you'd have known when you were younger...

Let us know below!

Amy22 · April 2023

Gemma wrote: »

Hey everyone,

How are your bank holiday weekends going? It was lovely and sunny in London yesterday and I went to an Ed Sheeran pop-up to listen to his new album in the sun Has anyone got up to anything nice?

Just starting a new thread on here as I had a few questions for you all...

- What is something that you wish you'd have known about being an adult/young adult?
- Is there something you wish you had learnt more about when you were younger to help you 'be good at adulting'?
- As a child, what did you think would be awesome about growing up but isn't as awesome as you thought it would be?

For me, I have found the money management that comes with being an adult quite tough at times and I wish I'd learnt more about how to budget, save, and invest.

I'm also not a great cook and would probably be a better one if I had learnt more about how to make quick but healthy meals.

We're going to be starting an 'adulting series' on our social media channels covering various different topics from money (adult admin; budgeting; food shopping), to health (navigating services; advocating for yourself), actions (DIY; cooking; how to vote), work/home (careers thinking; renting; moving house), looking after youself (coping with change; time management; wellbeing strategies), and more.

So we'd like to hear your thoughts too on what 'good adulting' means to you and things you wish you'd have known when you were younger...

Let us know below!

This is a great thread and in glad that it's being addressed too. Honestly, I was the same with money and budgeting as I never really learnt much about it. When I was younger I always remember thinking how cool it would be to be an adult which it is in some ways but I'd like to address that adulthood isn't always as glamorous as the media advertise. Yeah it can be glam but I realised how much responsibility that you have as an adult especially with managing bills and tax.

I think looking back now I wish my secondary school focused more on teaching us bills and how to budget. I too wished I learnt how to cook as well. I had a few lessons in school but I never learnt much. I felt that I was taught the type of mathematics that wasn't relevant to real life as most of the time the things I learnt I haven't used again in my adult hood. I personally think that there should be more focus in schools for life skills that would benefit many when it comes to being an adult so they are prepared.

However I will say there are benefits to being an adult such as having more freedom, travelling, going out with friends and doing things you love.

Going to an Ed Sheeran concert sounds amazing, I bet it was a really nice event to go to!.
My town had their annual food fair yesterday which was nice so I went and did a bit of retail therapy 😂 (maybe a bit too much hehe).

JJLemon18 · May 2023

I love this thread! But I think there are things we can only learn through experience unfortunately. I think for me the thing I wish I knew the most about 'adulthood' is the fact that once it comes it will stay forever, you can never retreat back to childhood when things get too hard. Its a realisation that I got recently.
I know there are so many young people who want to rush into adulthood because they think its much better. But adulthood will always come one day, many people are just not prepared for it.
So I guess if I could go back in time and tell my younger self something then I would tell myself to make the most of the time I have the present moment.

Azziman · May 2023

Hey @Gemma, this is a great idea of a thread! For me, I think the main thing I'd like to see more people learn at secondary school is civic participation - things like voting (how the UK voting systems work, General vs Council elections etc), volunteering (both learning about it, and perhaps doing volunteering at the school or nearby charities), and community engagement (learning about the local area and developing closer ties with the community).

I initially wrote out a much longer response for this but decided to rewrite and keep it short! But in summary, these elements of civic participation are things I've been lucky to have been interested in from a younger age, but I was the odd one out at that age (apart from programs such as the Duke of Edinburgh award). It still surprises me that tens of millions of people don't engage with any of the three, and I'd love to see a country where everyone could participate to make the country a better place

Gemma · May 2023

Hey @Amy22, @JJLemon18 and @Azziman, thanks so much for your replies and glad to hear you love this thread idea

It's so nice to hear your thoughts on the topic. I find myself often reflecting back on what I thought of adulthood when I was younger.

Totally feel you @JJLemon18 on making the most of your childhood. You're right that often we're keen to grow up fast but I've found there is actually little structure in the adult world and that things change fast. I totally relate to wishing I could go back and tell my younger self to chill a little and enjoy it. Have you come across any things that take you back to a nice place in your childhood? I sometimes come across these videos on TikTok of old toys that I used to play with and had completely forgotten about. It brings back lots of memories haha

@Azziman, these are such great ideas to help encourage young people to make a difference. I honestly don't think I remember even talking about civic participation once at school! Actually, the only time it was mentioned was during the Scottish referendum (I'm Scottish) but I honestly think they could have done better there as we would often just have conversations amongst ourselves. Learning more about volunteering and community engagement is such a good point - do you think this would have made you feel more connected with your local community?

@Amy22, my school was the same in teaching us very little life lessons. I think they could definitely have done better in that respect - even in terms of talking more about mental health, wellbeing and coping strategies. But you're right that adulthood does have so many benefits in terms of being able to hold that independence to explore your own interests. (Like going to an annual food fair! Sounds delish... did you try anything?)

Are there any things you think schools did/do well at, in preparing you for different elements of adulthood?

Dancer · May 2023

I'm not actually an adult yet but one thing that my school has been doing well with to support students with the transition to adulthood is talking about CV's.

Gemma · May 2023

@Dancer, oh that's great that your school is doing that! That will be so helpful to know how to write a good CV.

I think careers and employability can often get a bit lost at school! Have you had any wider conversations at school around exploring different careers?

SpaceOtter · May 2023

This is an awesome thread and made me think. I could go on about a million things i wish someone explained from how repeat perscriptions work to how do taxes work.

I havent been an adult for long but somethimg i wish i knew was people dont expect you to magicaly know the answers to everything the day you turn 18.
Its ok to ask questions. I always felt embarassed and rude asking questions. And i still have to remind myself its ok.

But some people actualy like answering things. Its ok to ask any questions you need answers too. Its ok to ask your supervisor to clarify if you dont fully understand the instructions. Or ask the train conductor if its the right train. Its better to ask than go in completely blind.
Youre always allowed to ask for help, no matter your age.

JJLemon18 · May 2023

SpaceOtter wrote: »

I havent been an adult for long but somethimg i wish i knew was people dont expect you to magicaly know the answers to everything the day you turn 18.
Its ok to ask questions. I always felt embarassed and rude asking questions. And i still have to remind myself its ok.

But some people actualy like answering things. Its ok to ask any questions you need answers too. Its ok to ask your supervisor to clarify if you dont fully understand the instructions. Or ask the train conductor if its the right train. Its better to ask than go in completely blind.
Youre always allowed to ask for help, no matter your age.

@SpaceOtter This is actually really true! I wish I knew this a lot sooner, but honestly I think I still often struggle to ask questions. I'm always too scared of people judging "you're so old now, how do you not know this yet?". Thank you!

Amy22 · May 2023

Gemma wrote: »

Hey @Amy22, @JJLemon18 and @Azziman, thanks so much for your replies and glad to hear you love this thread idea It's so nice to hear your thoughts on the topic. I find myself often reflecting back on what I thought of adulthood when I was younger.

Totally feel you @JJLemon18 on making the most of your childhood. You're right that often we're keen to grow up fast but I've found there is actually little structure in the adult world and that things change fast. I totally relate to wishing I could go back and tell my younger self to chill a little and enjoy it. Have you come across any things that take you back to a nice place in your childhood? I sometimes come across these videos on TikTok of old toys that I used to play with and had completely forgotten about. It brings back lots of memories haha

@Azziman, these are such great ideas to help encourage young people to make a difference. I honestly don't think I remember even talking about civic participation once at school! Actually, the only time it was mentioned was during the Scottish referendum (I'm Scottish) but I honestly think they could have done better there as we would often just have conversations amongst ourselves. Learning more about volunteering and community engagement is such a good point - do you think this would have made you feel more connected with your local community?

@Amy22, my school was the same in teaching us very little life lessons. I think they could definitely have done better in that respect - even in terms of talking more about mental health, wellbeing and coping strategies. But you're right that adulthood does have so many benefits in terms of being able to hold that independence to explore your own interests. (Like going to an annual food fair! Sounds delish... did you try anything?)

Are there any things you think schools did/do well at, in preparing you for different elements of adulthood?

Aw the food fair was brilliant but the food was so pricey!!!!

There was a craft fair there too so I got some jewellery from some really nice craft stalls. I think if schools focused more on well being before lockdown I think more students would have benefited a lot especially during Covid lockdowns too as I found my school did focus on some well being but not all of it. Also, one thing that I wished my school taught about was neurodiversity and the LGBTQIA+ community as I feel a lot more students would have had more awareness about the community itself as well as neurodiversity. I feel it would had benefited me a lot too as I never had lessons even though I had to do a thing called Welsh Bacc in my school which everyone in Wales has to do. I remember deciding to do my project on the LGBTQIA+ community as we never had actual lessons so by doing it I taught myself more about the community.

'Adulting'

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