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Just after some advice
Rhys
Posts: 292 The Mix Regular
Hey, so, its been a while since ive been here, and never on an advice asking side, last time i was here actively was as a boards moderator.. Not sure if anyone that was around back there is still here now but im rambling.
I've recently (13th of feb), been diagnosed with Bipolar Affective Disorder, to go ontop of my delusional paranoia, psychosis, generalised anxiety disorder ect ect.
The advice im after, is more to do with the Bipolar.. I'm just wondering, will it get easier to manage?
I'm on medication, anti-depressant, and an anti-psychotic, the latter to manage my mania's, but i just.. I just want normality. I hate switching between deep depressions and insanely high, eurphoric Mania's.
I dunno if im writing here for advice now, or just to get things off my chest. other then the family i live with (mum and older brother), i have no friends irl, i have no one i feel i can really confide in.
I feel alone. Yeah i have my CAT therapist. but i still feel alone.
But going back to my original statement. Will Bipolar get easier to deal with ?
I haven't heard from the mental health services since the 13th of feb, unsure why.
Ive just came out from a heavy depressive cycle, after spending 1.5 months in mania, and i know im going back into a manic cycle, which i really dont want to do. I just want... to feel normal. Will that be possible ?
(if i posted in wrong section please move to the correct place, if anyhing needs editing out ofc go ahead, and if i dont reply im probably sleeping)
I've recently (13th of feb), been diagnosed with Bipolar Affective Disorder, to go ontop of my delusional paranoia, psychosis, generalised anxiety disorder ect ect.
The advice im after, is more to do with the Bipolar.. I'm just wondering, will it get easier to manage?
I'm on medication, anti-depressant, and an anti-psychotic, the latter to manage my mania's, but i just.. I just want normality. I hate switching between deep depressions and insanely high, eurphoric Mania's.
I dunno if im writing here for advice now, or just to get things off my chest. other then the family i live with (mum and older brother), i have no friends irl, i have no one i feel i can really confide in.
I feel alone. Yeah i have my CAT therapist. but i still feel alone.
But going back to my original statement. Will Bipolar get easier to deal with ?
I haven't heard from the mental health services since the 13th of feb, unsure why.
Ive just came out from a heavy depressive cycle, after spending 1.5 months in mania, and i know im going back into a manic cycle, which i really dont want to do. I just want... to feel normal. Will that be possible ?
(if i posted in wrong section please move to the correct place, if anyhing needs editing out ofc go ahead, and if i dont reply im probably sleeping)
“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.”― Bernard M. Baruch
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Comments
I'm not the best at advice but I just wanna say you should be proud of yourself. People always tell me 'you should be so proud of yourself!!' and I'm like 'lol no' but honestly, you're doing really well and you should try and be as kind to yourself as you can
Sending hugs
It sounds extremely exhausting going from such highs to lows, I can't even begin to imagine the kind of toll that takes on both the body and the mind
Similarly to Xee, I have a very close friend who experiences the same kinds of highs and lows you're talking about due to their bipolar disorder. They certainly have expressed the same worries, fears and general discontent about their mental health, especially the idea of 'will this ever be easier?'. Fortunately, for them, after a fair period on medication they were able to find a more calm balance between the highs and lows. Nevertheless, the meds alone would not have sufficed (their words, not mine). A critical part of their recovery/ability to cope on the day-to-day was really centred around talking to other people who actually 'get it'.
Of course, we can give you as much support and advice as you like, but sometimes it really is just nice to talk to other people with bipolar who totally get nearly every part of your struggle. My friend used:
https://www.bipolaruk.org/pages/events/category/online-support-groups-parent-category
to find groups for people to talk with and said that this allowed them to come to terms with having bipolar and also figuring out some specific coping mechanisms that weren't so general like 'do self-care'.
I hope this can be of some use, if not, I am still more than happy to just hear you vent if you'd like
xxx
Managing bipolar disorder can be challenging, but it's important to remember that with proper treatment and support, many people are able to lead fulfilling lives. It's great that you're on medication and seeing a CAT therapist, as those are important components of managing bipolar disorder.
It's possible that over time, you may develop more effective coping mechanisms and strategies for managing your symptoms. It can also be helpful to educate yourself about the disorder and learn more about what triggers your mood episodes.
Remember that it's okay to reach out for support, whether it's from a therapist, support group, or loved ones. You don't have to go through this alone. Keep working with your treatment team, and keep working for the future!
As has already been mentioned, bipolar can be quite difficult to manage but not impossible. It will largely be about accessing the right treatment and support for you, being aware of your triggers and building a strong support network.
You deserve to be heard on the bad days and celebrated on the good days, just as much as anyone else. It just means some things might be trickier for you, on some days, than on other days. I can hear how feeling alone is a big part of this for you at the moment, but we are all here for you.
It might also be worth joining a community of like-minded people, who struggle with bipolar. Sometimes, people who experience similar things are the best at making us feel heard, understood and validated. You really deserve that.
The long waiting lists sound particularly difficult and I hope you are able to access the support you need and deserve soon. Remember, different things work best for different people and it is ok to not instantly find the thing that works best for you
Im reading the posts that have been added, so ill finish replying once im done;
@AislingDM - Ill check out the link you sent me, ive opened it in another tab now, so ill check it out, thank you!
To eveyrone elsee that replied, tthank you, ive read every reply and im glad theres people here to help still :>
After speaking to my therapist (who is now off sick for a few weeks :<) She's been my main lifeline in getting help, as the Primary Care Team disregarded me wanting my psychosis diagnosis looked at. However, since speaking to the Psychiatric Dr from the mental health services on the 13th of feb, and gettting put onto 300mg of Quetiapine, ive not heard from them since. My therapist has since sent emails on my behalf to the mental health services, but not heard anything sadly.
However, to my surprise the therapist has said on my medical record it now states i have Cyclothymia, which from my understanding is a milder form of Bipolar, but results in faster cycles.
so thats fun...
But I guess now is just a waiting game for my next appointment, yay
I'm sorry, it is frustrating to feel like you're being ignored by professionals who should be there to help. I'm glad you therapist will be back soon. I hope your next appointment goes well.
As @AislingDM has pointed out, it can get better in the future. I too had a friend who was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and she had your same worries, but she learnt to manage it day by day through therapy and by creating healthy coping mechanisms.
How has being diagnosed with Cyclothymia made you feel?
I wish you good luck with your next appointment, let us know how it goes.
Plus, all this waiting around is exhausting in and of itself because you're left wondering what is going on without any sense of clarity and when you're on meds at the same time, it's almost like what are the professionals thinking right now?
When you're talking about the surprise of Cyclothymia, is it because the diagnosis is a shock or the fact that no one has explicitly mentioned it is a shock? Either way, it can be a lot to take on board tbh and giving yourself time to process it makes a lot of sense.
How have you been feeling the past month or so? xx
@genderless_fungi
The diagnosis is kinda iffy, I dont exactly know how i feel about it, like my therapist was more leaning towards Skitzoaffective disorder, which to me sountt more.. me, due tto my psychosis and other stuff, but, just getting the help is.. something.
@AislingDM
Its more the fact that only my therapist, who has access to some off my patient record has mentioned it more then anything, ive been pushing for years (even since i left TheMix as a moderator so many yearrs ago) for my diagnosis to be looked at as i suspected a type of Mood Disordder, but no one wanted to help :<
Recently my moods have been... not great tbh, very low, lower then i wouldd particularly like to be, i know its only temporary but its still not great.
sorry, i tend to disappear from time to time, especially when the lower end of the cycles hit
(sorry for the month old bump)
See this is the thing that can make people so reluctant to reach out for help/for an understanding because when you want a type of diagnosis to be considered, you can be rebuffed or not taken seriously by the professionals involved, which is beyond unfair
Knowing that this period of low mood is temporary can be a great thing to hold on to, in order to get you through each day
I really appreciate you coming back to update us, no matter how long you aren't on here for, I think it's always lovely to hear from you xxx
@AislingDM
I spoke to my care manager today, he's been assigned to me for about a month or two now, but has yet to even talk about doing a care plan with me, i wanted to see how the phone appointment went with him today, its lead me to truely believe he doesnt care.
I tried explaining how i was finding it hard to cope, and i wasnt happy with how things have been left ect, but he just said okay and said he will phone in two weeks, the phone call lasted exactly 2 mins and 54 seconds.
When i was under their care before, they was amazing, my old care manager was great, same with the Dr's. but I got discharged in 2018 november, and was told if i nneededd help again just ask.
I then proceeded to try and get help all of 2020 - 2022 and kept getting declined, if it wasnt for my therapist pushing last year, i wouldn'tt of even got a semi diagnosis this yearr.