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School Rumours

potatololpotatolol Posts: 6 Confirmed not a robot
Hi everyone,

I haven't been here in a while, I was struggling with my mental health two years ago, used to self harm etc. But I am now back due to something that has come up at school.

So I had sex with this guy a few times when we were 13/14(?) i cant remember it was years ago, I'm now 17. We haven't really talked in years, but he texted me today saying he needs to call me.

I used to be really best friends with this girl until we stopped being friends because she became a really toxic person, I told her everything including that I hooked up with guy years ago. Ever since we stopped being friends she's spread fake rumours about such as me hating women, being a nazi etc. So when i joined sixth form I found a new friend group who are lovely and we are a group of people that are kind of overlooked and we keep to ourselfs (which is good) so I don't really talk to anyone else in the year group.

So I answered the phone and apprently he said there's been rumours in our year group that he sent me nudes and that I took pictures of him and printed them out and have them hung up in my bedroom. Obviously this is completely untrue and my ex friend has spread these rumours to ruin my life. Apprantely this rumour has been going around since Septmber I haven't heard about it. But clearly it's gotten worse this week hence why he called me. I talked to him and obv said none of it is true and he knows that too but he said if people say it again he's gonna beat someone up.

I honestly just don't know what to do if someone brings it up, like I don't want any of this, we hooked up years ago and i just keep to myself and my little friend group and focus on my a-levels and now i have this horrible stuff being said about me. I said to him he should just let it blow over but someting tells me he will engage if someone brings it up again.

I'm genuinely shaking and crying right now, like what have i done to deserve this i get good grades i do volunteering i hate that this is being done to me. Does anyone have any advice or similar experiences?

I'm worried that if this becomes a huge thing i will spiral again and my mental healt with get worse. I'm finally in a place where i am happy in my life, the happiest ive been and im worried that everything is going to go wrong and i fall into my old habits...
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Comments

  • SpaceOtterSpaceOtter Community Champion Posts: 885 Part of The Mix Family
    edited March 2023
    Hello potatolol! Im really sorry this happened it sounds horrible. Sending lots of hugs.

    Im really sorry i dont really have any advice. I just wanted to say its not your fault and youve absolutely done nothing to deserve this.

    Rumors are horrible and so difficult to stop. I remember one going around school about me, it came with a horrible nickname. Everyone kept telling me it would die out and it did. But it was really sad and difficult waiting for that.

    We are always here to listen if venting helps. You dont have to go through this alone. <3


    The only thing i could think of is talking to the girl who started the rumour, but it doesnt sound like theyd be open to listening.

    Focusing on your studies sounds like a good idea but i know its easier said than done. Is there anything that helps you calm down when you feel like this? Like a favourite film.

    Sending lots of hugs. Always happy to listen


    You're awesome!
  • potatololpotatolol Posts: 6 Confirmed not a robot
    SpaceOtter wrote: »
    Hello potatolol!

    Hey, it's nice to know im not alone i just find it so horrible how someone can do something like this. I honestly dont want to talk to her at all i feel like it would be adding fuel to the fire. I mean i havent heard anything about the rumour but then again would i if there is a rumour going on around me. But clearly they've spoken to the guy (who is straight) abt it since he texted me after all these years.

  • AzzimanAzziman Moderator, Community Champion Posts: 1,998 Extreme Poster
    Hey! Just came to say I agree with SpaceOtter - it absolutely is not your fault and you've done nothing to deserve this, please don't beat yourself up about it. Rumours are an unpleasant part of school life, so totally understand that it's not a nice feeling on top of all the stresses of school life! Eventually it will calm down as people lose interest and find a new rumour to bother about, so it will get easier in time. I think you're right to keep focus on your studies, volunteering and friend group through this, that foundation is important during tougher times like this. But yes, please do keep using the forum or the chat as an outlet, it can be helpful during these times!
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