Feeling like I got imposter syndrome

Amy22

I dont know but sometimes I feel like I got imposter syndrome. I have done research into it before and I feel like I resonate with some of the traits a lot, especially feeling like a fraud. Sometimes its hard to drown out these odd thoughts now and then. I dont know, I feel like a fake sometimes. The thing is I tend to be a very creative person and most of my struggles are to do with my creativity and the barrier I guess I create for myself. I keep putting up obstacles eventhough I don't need to. I love being creative but I feel like I bare the curse of feeling fake and unauthentic. I struggle with originality eventhough nothing is truely original or will ever be. However, I feel like sometimes I am too ambitious, I'm too hard on myself. How do I become less hard on myself. I know its easier said than done but I want to get over this stupid fear. Sorry for the rant.

HarryT

Hello @Amy22,

You've been really brave to reach out and share this with us. We really do appreciate your openness. How does it feel to have voiced this here? Have you ever spoken about this with anyone before?

You mentioned that you sometimes feel as though you're a fraud, Amy. Are there any particular situations that make you feel that way, or is there anything that helps you to validate your value and worth?

These feelings are completely valid, Amy, and it's great to see you bring reflective enough to be exploring them here. Know they we see your worth and value you here

Take care,
Harry

Amy22

HarryT wrote: »

Hello @Amy22,

You've been really brave to reach out and share this with us. We really do appreciate your openness. How does it feel to have voiced this here? Have you ever spoken about this with anyone before?

You mentioned that you sometimes feel as though you're a fraud, Amy. Are there any particular situations that make you feel that way, or is there anything that helps you to validate your value and worth?

These feelings are completely valid, Amy, and it's great to see you bring reflective enough to be exploring them here. Know they we see your worth and value you here

Take care,
Harry

Thank you @HarryT I guess my parent know about it but I tend to deal with it myself. Like right now I deleted some old story posts from my Instagram archieve because I made a bag but I saw that someone else made it with the same colours. I haven't felt like this in a while. I'm worried that I'm relapsing back into my old habits where I would double check. I don't know. I know that I try to tell myself to enjoy what I do but I feel like I can't at the moment. I've always felt like I had imposter syndrome and that I have to be authentic enough. I'm worried about going back into that dark place. Maybe I am relapsing, maybe I was meant to really. I tend to be a very ambitious person and I push myself too hard. How do I start being easy and less hard on myself?. I would really appreciate some advice on this.

AislingDM

Thank you so much for being so open and detailed about how much stress this is causing you @Amy22 , you make so many good points about how overwhelming and draining it can be to feel like a fraud, especially in your field of passion. Additionally, given that you're such a creative person, you're always stuck feeling like you've got to create the 'next cool thing' or something 'totally' original, even though, as you say, we all derive inspiration from everyone around us and from all that we see in our day-to-day lives. I can't imagine how frustrating it must be for your mind to start spiralling in this type of doubt to the point where you're actually getting rid of evidence of your awesome creations

In terms of advice, I know there are articles and things out there, so I'll link a couple of those, if that's okay?

https://blog.hubspot.com/marketing/impostor-syndrome-tips

But in terms of personal advice, it may sound so silly, but honestly, the main thing that helped me is:

1) talking to yourself how you'd talk to your friend when they've done something cool or successful, and this doesn't have to be out loud, but just quietly to yourself saying "those colours on the bag were cool and that's probably why the other person used them too, it's nice that we both had that mindset"

2) gently begin complimenting yourself and your work to others, there's no need to start with big scary statements like "I'm the no.1 creative person in the world", instead you can just say "I liked this one part of my design plan, it makes me happy".

I hope those can be of some use, and I am happy to think up some more advice with you, if you'd like Huge hugs xx

Amy22

AislingDM wrote: »

Thank you so much for being so open and detailed about how much stress this is causing you @Amy22 , you make so many good points about how overwhelming and draining it can be to feel like a fraud, especially in your field of passion. Additionally, given that you're such a creative person, you're always stuck feeling like you've got to create the 'next cool thing' or something 'totally' original, even though, as you say, we all derive inspiration from everyone around us and from all that we see in our day-to-day lives. I can't imagine how frustrating it must be for your mind to start spiralling in this type of doubt to the point where you're actually getting rid of evidence of your awesome creations

In terms of advice, I know there are articles and things out there, so I'll link a couple of those, if that's okay?

https://blog.hubspot.com/marketing/impostor-syndrome-tips

But in terms of personal advice, it may sound so silly, but honestly, the main thing that helped me is:

1) talking to yourself how you'd talk to your friend when they've done something cool or successful, and this doesn't have to be out loud, but just quietly to yourself saying "those colours on the bag were cool and that's probably why the other person used them too, it's nice that we both had that mindset"

2) gently begin complimenting yourself and your work to others, there's no need to start with big scary statements like "I'm the no.1 creative person in the world", instead you can just say "I liked this one part of my design plan, it makes me happy".

I hope those can be of some use, and I am happy to think up some more advice with you, if you'd like Huge hugs xx

Thank you so much @AislingDM for your advice. I often find myself being very hard on myself and I do feel like this is due to imposter syndrome. Today I was doing a creative project and I thought that the colours had already been done, I don't know why I am thinking this way. I think this is one of the things I may not be able to get over really.

AislingDM

Honestly, this makes so much sense. Like don't get me wrong I think a lot of people are prone to self-doubt @Amy22 but for some people it can be especially hard to overcome even for a moment and studies show that for women and people who experience misogyny, this sense of imposter syndrome is even harder to cope with, because you've got the world reinforcing to you that we shouldn't be confident or proud of ourselves.

I mean, even now, I feel embarrassed accepting any compliment and I can't quite put my finger on why.

Maybe it would be useful to talk about the kinds of feelings that arise when you are complimented on your work/when you start to feel good about something you've done?

Amy22

AislingDM wrote: »

Honestly, this makes so much sense. Like don't get me wrong I think a lot of people are prone to self-doubt @Amy22 but for some people it can be especially hard to overcome even for a moment and studies show that for women and people who experience misogyny, this sense of imposter syndrome is even harder to cope with, because you've got the world reinforcing to you that we shouldn't be confident or proud of ourselves.

I mean, even now, I feel embarrassed accepting any compliment and I can't quite put my finger on why.

Maybe it would be useful to talk about the kinds of feelings that arise when you are complimented on your work/when you start to feel good about something you've done?

I feel on the similar plane where it comes to taking compliments as sometimes I feel oddly awkward about being complimented. I can be my own critic sometimes which is a blessing and a curse. However, I always tend to thank the person even though inside I don't how to register the feeling which is weird. Quite lately, I have been trying to be less hard on myself and that this is the same for my college work too as I am trying to be less critic and more enjoying what I do. I think it's because I try to impress others a lot and I tend to put in too much extra work than what is needed. I think its to do with my curious persona. Thank you though for getting in touch with me, I really appreciate it