Explaining relationships/consent/LGBTQ+ stuff to younger kids (any book recs etc.?)

Former Member

Hey : )
So my younger brother is 11 and starting secondary school soon. I'm excited for him but also worried, because obviously teenagers can be pretty awful and it can be a shit time what with puberty, insecurity about your looks, peer pressure etc. I'd feel too awkward and weird asking him what sex-and-relationships stuff they covered at primary school, and given it's only a matter of time before he starts having a go at Instagram and Tiktok and whatever - plus in light of stuff I've heard about Andrew Tate and incels targeting insecure teen boys - I'm worried about the kinds of messages, depictions of women etc. he could end up coming across because it's trending or a friend posts it on a group chat or whatever. Also, I don't know how much sex ed has improved since I was at school, but my memories include zero LGBTQ+ inclusion and zero discussion of consent. (We did learn in Y10 about STIs and do the 'walk around in beer goggles then put a condom on a fake phallus' thing, though. Yay!)
Anyway, I'm insanely awkward in verbal conversations at the best of times, so I'm probably not the right person to explain stuff to him, but I don't want him to get hit hard by puberty and still know f-all. So I was wondering, does anyone know any books, websites (like The Mix I guess but for a slightly younger audience) and so on that I could point him towards, just in a 'if you're confused about anything, here's where you can find useful info' kind of way?
Cheers guys x

Dancer

There is a video that I remember watching when I was younger about consent. It made it easier to understand and I think that it was called Consent Is Like Tea.

Former Member

Hi @PenguinSky I'm hearing that you are worried about your brother starting secondary school and coming across new things to do with sex and relationships and puberty. Well done for reaching out and asking for advice, starting secondary school can be scary and it's great that you are helping your brother, with this change.

I think some secondary schools have copies of their curriculum online, so it might be possible to have a look at that and see if they cover sex and relationships.

A website that also has information on sex and relationships is childline. I'll attach some links below.
You and your body (including puberty) https://childline.org.uk/info-advice/you-your-body/
Friends and relationships (including peer pressure and sex and consent) https://childline.org.uk/info-advice/friends-relationships-sex/#explore
School and college (which has some useful information about starting new schools) https://childline.org.uk/info-advice/school-college-and-work/school-college/

Also echoing what @Dancer has said the consent is like tea video by the Thames Valley Police is a great video that explains consent in really simple terms.

I hope this helps, if there is anything else you need support with, remember we're all here for you.

AislingDM

I love the advice already given, I just wanted to hop on and say the fact that you are so concerned about your brother's development is amazing and so inspiring @PenguinSky Many siblings would feel a bit embarrassed to broach these topics, but you are so prepared to help him in whatever way he needs. This is truly commendable