Paranoia is hell.

lovemimoon

Hello, everyone.

I'm recovering from what seems like one long period of paranoia. When I first came here, I was going through one of the worst psychotic episodes I've had due to friendship group breaking down, and it seems like the aftermath is still lingering.

I struggle to talk to people online without feeling paranoid that someone is tracking me. I struggle to go out without feeling anxious about someone stalking me. Every interaction I have with a stranger has somewhat led me to shut down. I can't do my job right without shutting down.

Sleep is a joke, I struggle to talk to my friends and I feel like I can't function anymore. I don't know what's real anymore.

Former Member

I'm sorry to hear that you're struggling at the moment @lovemimoon having to deal with so much paranoia like you've described certainly sounds very upsetting. It's very brave of you to push through all that and talk through your issues here on the boards, hopefully the anonymity helps you a little. If you ever need other anonymous avenues to talk through your issues there's some great resources online that I can link you to just say the word.

Honestly I wish I could give more concrete advice for how to get through these struggles but since I'm not a medical professional there's only so much I can do. If you haven't already I think speaking with your GP about what you're going through would be a good start, though I can understand if that's difficult to do considering how you mentioned that you struggle to talk to even your friends. Is there anyone in your life feel like you absolutely can trust? Having that kind of anchor even if it's just one person can be a big help no matter what you're going through.

I hope this has helped a little and that things start getting better for you as soon as possible. please keep us up to date with how you're coping with all this I'm certainly rooting for you!

Past User

Good to see you around again, and sorry to hear you've not been feeling great. Has much happened or changed for you lately?

How are things in terms of medication, counselling and psychiatrist stuff? Still keeping your mood journal?

AislingDM

I was so grateful to see your handle appear on the discussion boards when I logged on today, you truly bring so much light to The Mix. After reading how much pain and anguish you have been in over the past while, I cannot even begin to imagine how burdened your mind has felt. It's no wonder even 'basic' functions like sleep have become impossible when it's like nothing makes sense anymore. Feeling such dreadful anxiety and stress that you cannot figure out what is real must be so emotionally taxing for you @lovemimoon because you're constantly having to re-evaluate every experience that you have

I wonder if you've ever noticed particular times where you feel more paranoid, or on the flipside, more relaxed and at peace? Working out any kind of pattern could be a key to the beginnings of coping. It could be something as random as feeling more paranoid right after dinner or something, but trying to ground your mind is something that's always worth trying in this way. I know I cannot begin to imagine the level of pressure that your mind is putting on you right now, but please know I will always be here to listen no matter what I know there are other avenues to try to cope with paranoia especially in the wake of psychosis, so if you wanted to talk anymore please feel free xxx Huge hugs