Parents and guardians: how to talk about drugs and alcohol?

AislingDM

I know there have been a few threads about how we should talk to friends and peers about drug and alcohol use, which is awesome and very important, especially because it is often with friends that we do drugs and drink alcohol.

However, I was thinking, do any young people have advice for adults about how they wish their parents/guardians would talk to them about drugs and alcohol?

Would you have wanted your parents to sit you down to talk about it all at a certain age? What kind of response is best if you have drank alcohol/done drugs at an 'early' age? Any thoughts are totally welcome here

Former Member

This is a really insightful thread, thank you so much @AislingDM

I think it's something that parents and guardians get really panicky and anxious about, and that can often present negatively. Some parents are more laid back of course, but I feel like parents should maybe be mindful of their reactions when discussing these topics, as I find they're sometimes quick to judge and start an argument rather than making the space safe and understanding. Particularly considering I'm sure they themselves have had experience with alcohol and/or drugs in their youth. So If they've had bad experiences with it in their youth they can often project it and become too overly involved or strict which can sometimes lead to unhealthy use to rebel (of course not everyone does). So I think if they are to sit down with young people, they should make sure it feels safe and supportive and not worrying and frustrating that they're not being heard or listened to.

Former Member

Fabulous thread idea! Super helpful

Something I wish I'd known more about was how different amounts of alcohol impact you. I remember when I was younger, I was anxious to have a drink because I didn't know how much would make me tipsy, how much would make me drunk, how much would be dangerous etc. It can be super confusing to research things like that, so if I was just casually spoken to before my first party or something like that, just to casually explain and answer any questions, that would've been super helpful

My school was fantastic for teaching us about drugs. But perhaps just open questions to check whether their child is learning at school, their thoughts, encouraging a safe space to talk about any peer pressure etc, that would be good

AislingDM

Such a fab point @Brookee !! Especially about the inadvertent projection of past emotions. I suppose parents largely want to keep their kids safe from anything with the potential to harm them and so sometimes that fear can come out in a way that just simply is not helpful for the young person. Plus, you're so right that if parents themselves have explored drug and alcohol use throughout their lives, it can feel a bit ironic when they frame their child's entire experience around having done something 'morally wrong'. Safe space certainly sounds like a key

I like that idea too, thinking about how kids can learn about drugs and alcohol in a social environment too, prioritising safety should definitely always be at the top of our lists right @coc0mac !! There's certainly something to be said for having a better understanding about literal quantities of drugs, or what the different alcohol percentages mean