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Coping with being the only single friend

AifeAife Community Manager Posts: 3,061 Boards Guru
Hi everyone,

Izzi (25), a Gen Now Ambassador has written an article on The Mix's website about the challenges you can face with self-esteem and loneliness when all your friends are in relationships. ⁣

Is this something you've experienced and what advice would you give to someone who is struggling with being the only single friend in their friendship group?
Maybe somethings don't get better, but we do. We get stronger. We learn to live with our situations as messy and ugly as they are. We fix what we can and we adapt to what we can't. Maybe some of us will never fully be okay, but at least we're here. We're still trying. We're doing the best we can. That's worth celebrating too ❤

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    Laura_tigger82Laura_tigger82 Moderator Posts: 5,153 Part of The Furniture
    edited January 2022
    Hi @Aife

    Thanks for sharing Izzi's article with us. Well done and thank you Izzi! What a wonderful read. I hope this reaches as many people as possible.

    Yes, I have. I would say it is okay to feel this way but try to focus on you and your own goals, people do care about you and you do still have a fabulous support network! You are no less valued :3
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    coc0maccoc0mac Posts: 1,054 Wise Owl
    Hi @Aife

    Thank you for sharing this here. A really great article! :heart:

    Absolutely. I'm at the age now where my friends are buying their first houses with their partners, getting engaged etc...and I'm single. But as the article says - that's totally okay!

    My advice: you can still do "coupley" things..but with your friends :blush: . So never feel afraid to reach out and ask. If you're seeing everyone going on winter wonderland dates and wishing that was you...plan to go with your bestie. If you want to celebrate valentines day - instead you could celebrate palentines, galentines, or have a date night with yourself doing all your favourite things. And hey...for us singles...after valentines day all the valentines chocolates will go on sale haha. A true win right there! :wink:
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    laviniavdlaviniavd Posts: 12 Settling in
    Hi @Aife!
    Thank you for sharing the article, its great and I completely agree on the importance of not entering a relationship because you feel lonely etc.
    My advice follows the article's points.
    I think its important to take the time when you're single to learn about yourself and discover the person you are, this can aid with things such as emotional regulation which is useful in any aspect of life such as friendships or romantic relationships. Learning about yourself and understanding your worth as someone who is single is truly beneficial. Not taking your friend's lack of availability to meet personally can be difficult but is also very important, by meeting with your friends and maybe meeting new friends or spending quality time with yourself can aid in reducing the feeling of loneliness and can help the formulation of self love, something that I find very comforting.
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    Laura_tigger82Laura_tigger82 Moderator Posts: 5,153 Part of The Furniture
    Hi @laviniavd,

    Thanks so much for your response and for providing your tips. Your tips are really insightful and important. Your tips will reach many more people than you probably realise. I am really glad you have found some comfort in them too :3
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    AislingDMAislingDM Moderator Posts: 1,666 Extreme Poster
    Love this seriously, so important!!

    I'd say it's also cool to enforce boundaries with friends. I know it can be a tendency for people to prioritise their romantic partners' time over their friends' which can leave friends feeling 1) less important to said friend 2) like romantic relationship time is just generally considered more important even though this should not be the case.

    Being able to say 'hey, I know you want to invite your boyfriend, but I was kind of hoping it would just be us two today!' is a good thing, as you are allowed to want time with your friends on your own terms <3 x
    FAQ | How to report a post | How to report spam
    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.
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