wen ur sad

ellie2000

why does it make u do wierd stuff

Former Member

Hi Ellie. Sadness, or any kind of difficult emotion, can certainly make us feel or act out of character. It's good to recognise when this happens, because then we can better control it, so it's great that you are asking about this. Would you like to talk a little more about what you mean by "weird stuff"?

ellie2000

sing blackbriar which i dont do anymore coz banging frm upstairs, shout at ppl u luv, stick stuff up urself ...etc

AislingDM

Couldn't agree more with what @coc0mac has said, when we struggle to process the emotional state we are in, there is often no predicting how we will act during/after this. There's that common saying about grief like 'no way of grieving is wrong' and I think this applies to a lot of negative emotions too. Like when we are sad, some will cry, some will close themselves off, others will throw themselves into their work and some people do a combination of all these things and there is nothing wrong with it. The only thing is, we need to think about which way of coping is the healthiest for us and others, for example I know you've mentioned sticking stuff up yourself, which is again very understandable, however unlike singing loudly this could have risks to your physical health (as putting 'foreign objects' in your body can cause damage/give you infections). This does not mean that you have done something 'weird' it just means we need to try to see if we can find healthier ways of coping, which is of course not as easy as I've made it sound. I'm wondering if you've ever noticed any particular pattern of when you do certain things, e.g., do you stick things up yourself when you are sad about certain experiences, or is it totally random? here, if you want to talk more about all this, and thank you for being so honest with us xx

ellie2000

i used to do it wen i was sad about feelings repeating as if i still dont feel free, or if i had a bad day. wat is a 'coping technique', they take a fat W n i take the fat L

AislingDM

Ah I see what you mean, like when you felt really trapped and like the day was awful that would be what you would turn to, I totally understand what you're saying, and as I said, it really is okay to respond to painful emotions in different ways. I think it's made especially hard when you can see other people winning when life feels like it's ending around you.

I guess a coping technique is any behaviour / task that makes pain and sadness or stress easier to deal with and process. It can be so many things for different people. My go-to one when I'm intensely sad is to watch my comfort shows, but this does not always work. What would you say bring you comfort in times of sadness/hurt, Ellie? xx

ellie2000

weekends cats , horror games

AislingDM

I love to hear you have a few things that bring you a sense of peace and/or enjoyment, as that's certainly not easy in this life. Do you find those things effective in helping with your sadness in different ways? xx

ellie2000

somedays its easy somedays it dont work

Former Member

Hi @ellie2000, That's okay, unfortunately some days will always be harder than others, the positive to take from this is the fact that you try. That's really incredible, I know it can be difficult to try and sit with these negative thoughts, so the fact you try and do whatever you can to help make this time a little easier is commendable!

ellie2000

i bought a lighter yesterday, i keep looking at it n thinking

Former Member

@ellie2000 Do you feel able to express more about how the lighter is making you feel, Ellie?

ellie2000

after last week i feel very very sad

ellie2000

i bought it bc i was sad but nvr used it

Former Member

@ellie2000 I'm so sorry that you've been feeling low emotionally. I think it's really incredible that you've fought through any urges to use the lighter. That's an amazing step, and I'm very proud of you, I know how difficult it can get to not act on negative thoughts, so this is amazing to hear!

AislingDM

That must have been such a stressful position to be in, to feel like your sadness was so overwhelming that you turned to buying a lighter. How do you feel about not using it, Ellie? xx

ellie2000

i just go to bed wen its gets too much, or play games b4 i get feel of oo-er.

AislingDM

I think it's really cool that you have these ways to try to cope with feeling so overwhelmed and upset, but it must be horrid to be waiting for pain to be 'over' all the time. Which games bring you the most happiness?

ellie2000

outlast 1+2, fran bow, little misfortune, bad dream: stories, crash bandicoot, jump king, and many more

ellie2000

little nightmares 1+2, blair witch and among the sleep

AislingDM

Ooh I love Crash Bandicoot, it's such a fun idea I reckon!! I'm glad you have lots of games to bring you happiness, what do you think it is about games that make you feel more relaxed? xx

ellie2000

different emotions come up, wen u die or get scared in a game, ur fine. wen theres a game tht hav hav a thought provoking ending, i think 'sh*t and then i fone someone and descibe my thoughts and feelings on the ending.
do u think we hav xp like in diablo?

Laura_tigger82

Hi @ellie2000

Thanks for your response. From your response, I hear two things about games that help you in particular.

These are allowing yourself to feel the emotions that come up and talking to someone about how you feel.

Are these things you feel comfortable doing outside of games?

ellie2000

Games block out all my feelings, I do keyboard, the first I do to calm me down is the 'coffin dance'

Laura_tigger82

I am glad to hear you have strategies which help to calm you down @ellie2000

AislingDM

I love that for you Ellie, such an insightful perspective on how we navigate our lives, not just seeing games as something for fun, but things that also have deeper meanings for us and change how we see others. That question about diablo is interesting, when you say XP do you mean like experience points in real life?

ellie2000

experience points each person need levels n to no where they are. n how to cope

Laura_tigger82

I think things certainly get easier with experience @ellie2000