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In agony but still have to work (TW: suicidal feelings)

Kate_20Kate_20 Posts: 653 Incredible Poster
in Health & Wellbeing
I am lucky that I was granted the extensions. However, I don't want to worry my parents so I still have to work and finish this degree as soon as possible so that they would assume that my depression is not severe. I cannot wait until I am well enough to work because I probably wouldn't be well again. I feel heavy and I don't feel like moving at all. I now feel the pain all over my body and nobody can save me. I still cannot stop working because I need to work. I feel the strong desire to die.
Tengo el alma en cuarentena y roto el cuerpo
Qué dolor, qué pena y qué tormento
El Kanka - Lo mal que estoy y lo poco que me quejo
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    Laura_tigger82Laura_tigger82 Moderator Posts: 5,107 Part of The Furniture
    edited October 2021
    Hi @Kate_20,

    Please remember to prioritise your health and well-being. I think it is amazing that you still have the determination to finish your degree despite struggling. However, please at least remember to reach out for support to help you get to the finish line of your degree. Support may be external (e.g. Student Space, us, Samaritans and Papyrus) or internal (e.g. your university disability and pastoral team).

    We care about you and believe in you, we know you have what it takes to finish your degree, you have already shown so much determination. Would you like to talk to us about where you are in your degree currently? When I last heard, you were doing your transcribing! How has that been going for you? Also, please remember if you have been affected by anything discussed in this post, you can contact Samaritans and Papyrus.

    Samaritans (24/7):

    Call 116 123
    Email jo@samaritans.org

    Papyrus (2 pm-midnight):

    Call 0800 068 41 41
    Email pat@papyrus-uk.org
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    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.
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    Kate_20Kate_20 Posts: 653 Incredible Poster
    edited October 2021
    @Laura_tigger82 I am at the end of the course. I only have my dissertation left to do. I find it awkward to ask for more support from the student support again because I already asked for too much support. I don't want to appear ungrateful. It is really painful to transcribe things when sitting there is already so hard
    TW
    (I guess it is because I am underweight I could feel my bones).

    [TW added by moderator]
    Post edited by TheMix on
    Tengo el alma en cuarentena y roto el cuerpo
    Qué dolor, qué pena y qué tormento
    El Kanka - Lo mal que estoy y lo poco que me quejo
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    Laura_tigger82Laura_tigger82 Moderator Posts: 5,107 Part of The Furniture
    Hi @Kate_20

    I really understand you are having a prolonged difficult time. Sometimes there are only so many times we can reach out for support before feeling we should be dealing with it ourselves and not bother anyone else. However, (a) that thought is incorrect and (b) Student Space can be anonymous (so they won't even know!). Is there anything specifically the Student Space have done which you have found useful? - I am just wondering if we could do the same? If there is anything at all we can do to support you further, please do not hesitate to reach out and let us know :)

    FAQ | How to report a post | How to report spam
    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.
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    Kate_20Kate_20 Posts: 653 Incredible Poster
    @Laura_tigger82 I am talking about student support service at uni. I have never looked into Student Space though. Is the Webchat the same as TheMix?
    Tengo el alma en cuarentena y roto el cuerpo
    Qué dolor, qué pena y qué tormento
    El Kanka - Lo mal que estoy y lo poco que me quejo
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