venting

ellie2000

is the hmn trainer the right person to vent to?

AislingDM

I know you posted about venting to the HMN trainer before, and I just wanted to check what 'HMN' stands for before giving an answer about how helpful it might be to vent to them? Sometimes any listening ear can be a good one though, Ellie. Have you found the trainer helpful? x

ellie2000

HMN stand for mind, i put initials just coz, i have found tht one helpful coz she wants me to b happy:) whoever u tlk to is it the same sortof person? apart frm peer mentors who r rubbish n only witters on about recovery stars

Former Member

That’s great that she wants you to be happy. What does she say when you rant to her?

ellie2000

i dont recieve reply she just passes it on to l.touch and tlks to me bout stuff. i get worried wen ppl want to tlk to me about a matter

AislingDM

It's completely reasonable to feel that way, Ellie. It can be quite scary and frustrating when people come to us to talk about something really serious. What do you think makes you feel so worried about it?

ellie2000

The build up to, I think it's not a good conversation

AislingDM

1000% that's really understandable, Ellie. There can be a lot of stress before talking about difficult and complex conversation topics, so it's no wonder you'd feel reluctant and panicked about having serious discussions. Is there anything that helps to make you feel even a tiny bit less anxious before such convos?

ellie2000

i was fbooking forums talking about facebook funnily enough, how they store our data 4 a yr. then i emailed the person i demand to do zoom with n didnt. then i dont no wat i did after tht. is it normally to blackout wen ur having a bad day?

ellie2000

will ppl abondon me 4 being me

AislingDM

Those are both really important questions, Ellie. Wondering what sort of responses are 'normal' and whether people will still love you for being your true self is very valid and understandable. I think the 'blacking out' is something you might consider talking to a mental health professional about, because it could be, as you say, your brain trying to simply make it through an immensely difficult day, in which case it would be great for you to gain some support for this. In terms of the abandonment, this is a really reasonable question, because we can feel extremely panicked at the idea of being left alone without anyone to support us. the most honest answer I can give is that, if someone opts to leave you after you have expressed your full and true self, they were never a good friend to begin with. Plus, the more true you are to yourself, there is the potential for making friends with people who are even more like all the parts of you. I do hope this helps, Ellie . I'm wondering, what's got you anxious about the idea of people abandoning you? xx

ellie2000

i go down town looking 4 ppl i knew, and i thought ffs, life is like im in the car boot constantly