I have used up all my energy and I reached nowhere

Kate_20

Trigger warning: mental health crisis.
I have anxiety and depression and have been in MH crisis all this year: I went in and out of A&E to get physically cleared and the crisis team came and left. I did participate actively in all the classes and read all the required readings but my coursework suffered. Right now I have 4 deadlines in September. 3 of them are 5000 words and one of them is 10000 words. The reason that I have 4 deadlines in September is that I was granted deferral without tuition for two modules. I thought it would be okay but then I suffered a violent crime in the street when I was waiting for an ambulance. All the teachers who are in charge of extensions are on annual leave. I don't know if the university is going to give me more extensions because I also get reasonable adjustments in place but feels insufficient and I think they have a limitation of how many extensions I can get. I am scared of everything right now and I feel like a burden to everyone. I am trying to work but I feel really overwhelmed and lightheaded. Is it all my fault not to take this year off? It is already too late now, I am at the end of the course. Sorry for sharing my issues.

independent_

No apology needed, that’s what we’re here for. I’m sorry to hear you’re having such a hard time.

It’s worth trying to speak to someone at your university, is there a welfare person you can speak to? Or student support. I didn’t go to uni so I don’t really know what’s available but if you’re honest with them they’ll want to support you however they can.

None of this will ever make you a burden, it’s ok to struggle and to get support for that.

Kate_20

independent_ wrote: »

No apology needed, that’s what we’re here for. I’m sorry to hear you’re having such a hard time.

It’s worth trying to speak to someone at your university, is there a welfare person you can speak to? Or student support. I didn’t go to uni so I don’t really know what’s available but if you’re honest with them they’ll want to support you however they can.

None of this will ever make you a burden, it’s ok to struggle and to get support for that.

Thank you for your kind words. I am just stressed out and I feel like a burden to the student support. I did call them after the incident but calling again seems way too much since nothing is really new about it.

independent_

Nothing wrong with calling them again if they can support you. They might be able to get you some counselling or even just help to take the pressure off with your assignments. Give them a call, they’re there to help you

Kate_20

independent_ wrote: »

Nothing wrong with calling them again if they can support you. They might be able to get you some counselling or even just help to take the pressure off with your assignments. Give them a call, they’re there to help you

I will try Elle.

independent_

Trying is all you can do. Keep talking to us if you feel it helps

Former Member

I agree try them again, and we are here to listen and none of us are perfect so don’t think ur a burden we are here to help each other 😀

Kate_20

independent_ wrote: »

Trying is all you can do. Keep talking to us if you feel it helps

I sometimes feel like I am bothering them with a minor problem and if one day I encounter a big problem they might not help

Kate_20

Ruh wrote: »

I agree try them again, and we are here to listen and none of us are perfect so don’t think ur a burden we are here to help each other 😀

I am a burden to my friends and those who were trying to help. I feel sorry for them. Why would they help someone who is too broken to be fixed?

Former Member

I'm sorry you feel like that. Your friends probably don't feel like that. Friendships are a two way thing, and we help each other in friendships. Sometimes asking people for reassurance is a good thing. I tend to do it a lot with my friends, and it seems annoying to me, but they don't mind giving it to me, as it just makes me feel better. People want to help if they care about you.

And you are not too broken to be fixed. You're doing your best right now, and that's enough. Helping ourselves get better is a long journey, and it's not easy. We're all here for you and don't be afraid to ask for help from people, it makes a world of a difference and makes the journey a lot easier

Kate_20

Sorry everyone things did not go well at all

Kate_20

kimberley1907 wrote: »

I'm sorry you feel like that. Your friends probably don't feel like that. Friendships are a two way thing, and we help each other in friendships. Sometimes asking people for reassurance is a good thing. I tend to do it a lot with my friends, and it seems annoying to me, but they don't mind giving it to me, as it just makes me feel better. People want to help if they care about you.

And you are not too broken to be fixed. You're doing your best right now, and that's enough. Helping ourselves get better is a long journey, and it's not easy. We're all here for you and don't be afraid to ask for help from people, it makes a world of a difference and makes the journey a lot easier

Thanks but I am always the one who needs help, which isn't quite right. And I keep on getting into new troubles. In this sense the friendship isn't two ways, it is one way.

Kate_20

I am still trying to make my situation better. I have not given up yet.

Former Member

I really hope you manage to take some steps in the right direction @Kate_20 I know everyone here on the boards is rooting for you. If there's anything you need to talk about or anything us here can do to help you don't hesitate to ask, and please keep us updated on how you're doing!

Kate_20

Riley wrote: »

I really hope you manage to take some steps in the right direction @Kate_20 I know everyone here on the boards is rooting for you. If there's anything you need to talk about or anything us here can do to help you don't hesitate to ask, and please keep us updated on how you're doing!

@Riley Thanks. Unfortunately, extensions have their drawbacks too after communicating with my department so I have to think twice.

Laura_tigger82

Hi @Kate_20,

Thanks for sharing your issues as it enables us to support you and I hope that writing about your difficulties was also a comfort for you. It sounds like you have had a really difficult year and are now feeling stressed about deadlines. Understandably since they seem numerous and lengthy. However, you were right in the need to prioritise your mental health, I always advocate for putting health first as the other demands can come later once you are feeling better. Strengths I have noticed in your post are your engagement with the course content throughout which will support you and your willingness to seek support at this challenging time.

Generally, each university has its own policy with regard to extenuating circumstances. However, they are all in place to support students like yourself who have experienced difficulties outside of their control. At the moment, I am noticing that many universities do not require evidence for extenuating circumstances applications due to the difficulties of this year alone. I am wondering whether you could access your university policy as this might help to reassure you? You can usually find this by typing into Google something along the lines of X University extenuating circumstances.

Putting extenuating circumstances aside though in case you wish to and feel able to complete your assessments by the deadlines, I have found visual timetables, to-do lists and breaking tasks down into manageable steps effective for me. For example, if you study 5 days a week, you could assign one day per week to each of your assessments with a day remainder each week for any tasks leftover or to research information in more depth. You could then assign each week a particular number of words. For instance, if they are all due at the end of September, I would be inclined to assign a task of writing 1500 words each week for each of the 5000-word assignments and 2500 words each week for the 10000 words assignment. If this still feels overwhelming, I would split that further into the number of study sessions for each assignment.

Also, congratulations on making it to the end of your course! That in itself shows how far you have progressed, your commitment and dedication and it will be worth it. You can do this, I believe in you. If you could benefit from additional support with breaking down the tasks into a timetable, feel free to let me know and I will help you to work this out or you could use Studiosity's assessment calculator for support with this (https://www.studiosity.com/assignment-calculator). I am sending you hugs, take care!

Kate_20

Laura_tigger82 wrote: »

Hi @Kate_20,

Thanks for sharing your issues as it enables us to support you and I hope that writing about your difficulties was also a comfort for you. It sounds like you have had a really difficult year and are now feeling stressed about deadlines. Understandably since they seem numerous and lengthy. However, you were right in the need to prioritise your mental health, I always advocate for putting health first as the other demands can come later once you are feeling better. Strengths I have noticed in your post are your engagement with the course content throughout which will support you and your willingness to seek support at this challenging time.

Generally, each university has its own policy with regard to extenuating circumstances. However, they are all in place to support students like yourself who have experienced difficulties outside of their control. At the moment, I am noticing that many universities do not require evidence for extenuating circumstances applications due to the difficulties of this year alone. I am wondering whether you could access your university policy as this might help to reassure you? You can usually find this by typing into Google something along the lines of X University extenuating circumstances.

Putting extenuating circumstances aside though in case you wish to and feel able to complete your assessments by the deadlines, I have found visual timetables, to-do lists and breaking tasks down into manageable steps effective for me. For example, if you study 5 days a week, you could assign one day per week to each of your assessments with a day remainder each week for any tasks leftover or to research information in more depth. You could then assign each week a particular number of words. For instance, if they are all due at the end of September, I would be inclined to assign a task of writing 1500 words each week for each of the 5000-word assignments and 2500 words each week for the 10000 words assignment. If this still feels overwhelming, I would split that further into the number of study sessions for each assignment.

Also, congratulations on making it to the end of your course! That in itself shows how far you have progressed, your commitment and dedication and it will be worth it. You can do this, I believe in you. If you could benefit from additional support with breaking down the tasks into a timetable, feel free to let me know and I will help you to work this out or you could use Studiosity's assessment calculator for support with this (https://www.studiosity.com/assignment-calculator). I am sending you hugs, take care!

Thanks Laura it finally worked out