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Moving Away
Millie2787
Community Champion Posts: 5,154 Part of The Furniture
As a lot of you know Next month (40 days now) I’m moving away to go to university. Although I’m not going far I’m kind of excited to be able to have a fresh start in a new environment and a chance to get myself in a better place because at the moment I can’t access any support due to the fact I’m moving away next month so no services will take me on .
Last night I had a somewhat of a meltdown over moving I’m scared I won’t be able to cope . I’m scared that I’ll prove everyone right . Most of my family have there Concerns that I won’t be able to cope because I’m not confident or social like the rest of my siblings.
What if their right , what if I don’t last and I end up having to come back home and give up trying to become a nurse . I think the worries and the anxiety and the scaredness about moving away is kicking in now . Up until now I was so excited to go but I can’t tell anyone about all the worries I have about leaving now because they will just use it as a way to stop me going and transfer to the university that’s in the next city
Last night I had a somewhat of a meltdown over moving I’m scared I won’t be able to cope . I’m scared that I’ll prove everyone right . Most of my family have there Concerns that I won’t be able to cope because I’m not confident or social like the rest of my siblings.
What if their right , what if I don’t last and I end up having to come back home and give up trying to become a nurse . I think the worries and the anxiety and the scaredness about moving away is kicking in now . Up until now I was so excited to go but I can’t tell anyone about all the worries I have about leaving now because they will just use it as a way to stop me going and transfer to the university that’s in the next city
Sometimes all you need is one person to believe in you , for you to begin to believe in yourself.
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Comments
Firstly, I wanted to say congratulations on getting into university. My mum and my best friend are both nurses and it can be such a rewarding career!
Moving away from home for the first time can be scary. I remember feeling really nervous when I first went to university as I was going to be living with new flatmates and navigating a new place without my parents around. In the end, I really loved the experience of being independent and meeting new people. How do you think it would it make you feel if you were able to cross these barriers too?
You say you are worried that you won’t be able to access support since you are moving away from home. Most universities have a student support department who help students with various areas of need. Is this perhaps something you could look into finding out more about?
Good luck
I really would be so proud of myself if I could do this and I really do what to do this.
Oh no I meant that right now I can’t access any support in my home town because I’m moving away . I know I’ll be able to access support when move down there and I’m registered and settled . I already have a Specialist ASD mentor that will meet with me once a week when I start university as that’s being funded by DSA .
Ah I'm sorry I misunderstood what you meant there. It's great that the DSA are able to put that support in place for you once you arrive. Does that take some of the pressure off to know that you'll have somebody to talk to?
I think it’s only natural to be nervous about moving away, it’s a massive change and unknown so it’s ok to be worried. Just because you’re anxious now doesn’t mean you won’t cope with it when you do move though, I have no personal experience but most people I know who moved away for uni loved the independence of it. And I think for you especially that change of environment will massively benefit you.
Hopefully once you move you will be able to get the support in place that you need, with that support I think you will cope better than you think.
I’m already proud of you because I know how big this is for you. You’re doing amazing.
Good luck
@independent_ Thank you so much
Firstly, everything you are experiencing right now is completely natural, so please don't beat yourself up for feeling this way. A couple of months before I moved away to university I started feeling incredibly sick all the time, and couldn't keep down a lot of my meals. But university actually ended up being the best time of my life, I absolutely loved it! Will you be staying in university accommodation with other students?
As difficult as it might be, try to use those worries and fears as motivation. As you get more settled into university your confidence will grow in leaps and bounds — I know mine certainly did! So hopefully you'll be able to prove everyone wrong and show them that you can do it
But at the end of the day, if you do need to move back home, then that's totally okay as well. It doesn't necessarily have to be a final decision. Universities tend to be supportive of student's mental well-being and can be very accommodating. Quite a few of my friends took gap years and years out because they didn't feel it was right for them at that time. But they ultimately returned and ended up finishing their degree. So if you do need to come back home for a while, you can always return and finish your degree later on
There's one really important piece of advice I'd give about university - it sounds obvious, but your university experience is what you make of it. Studying isn't easy, and neither is living away from home. But remember why you're doing this! You're working hard to make your own future and path in life; to meet new people, gain confidence and maybe find friends; to get involved in the awesome extracurricular activities and societies they have on offer; to learn about the new town/city you're living in. And of course, you're learning to become more independent! There are so many great experiences to be had at university, so do your best and give it your best shot. You've got this! x
Good luck with everything and we will be here with you every step of the way if you ever need support
"Like when I was down you just had that smile that made me feel like everything's worthwhile. Thinking of the day when you went away, what a life to take, what a bond to break, I'll be missing you"
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I know a few people have already said this, but it's really natural to feel anxious before moving away to university, or for making any big change really. My sister is leaving for her first year of university soon too, and she's been feeling pretty nervous about it lately as well. One thing that might help reduce some of your stress is getting involved in some of the opportunities universities put on for prospective students. My sister has joined the offer-holders groupchat that her uni is putting on for her course, and she's found getting to know a few people before she starts quite reassuring. Perhaps your university might be offering a similar thing?
Keep us updated on how uni goes for you, I'll be wishing you the best
You've got some really great advice in this thread! Like others have said, I think it is completely normal to feel anxious and nervous about such a big moment in your life. Moving away from home, perhaps for the first time, can be quite scary! I remember on my first day after moving into my university halls that I sat in my room, feeling to anxious to go and meet my neighbours. I was super worried I wouldn't fit in, or make any friends. That feeling didn't last, and I made some great friends that stayed with me through my four years at university.
It's important to realise that everyone is different, and things that others might have found easy you might find difficult, and things others found difficult you might find easy. If I had any advice to give to first-year uni me I think it would be:
1) Everyone is in the exact same boat as you are. Moving away from the first time, scared about making new friends. You are not alone in how you feel.
2) Put yourself out there(as far as you are comfortable!). Try a new hobby, get involved in a society you think you might like, and just explore all the opportunities avaliable to you.
3) Don't be scared to reach out for support, and make sure you are know what support is avaliable to you. Your university will(or should!) have an advice hub where they can signpost you to the right university help. If you need it, use it!
Best of luck with your move to university, let us know how you get on!
Congrats on getting into University!! That's such an achievement!!
It's completely normal to feel overwhelmed before moving out, I felt the exact same. I moved to a different city where I knew no one and had the exact same thoughts as you. However, those fears are soon put to rest when you move in and settle. Take some time to relax and explore your surroundings, unpack and decorate your room and meet your new flatmates. Just try to remember everyone is in the same boat and your flatmates will be just as nervous to meet you as you are to meet them. Keep an open mind and positive mindset as much as possible
Hope this helps
I think it's totally understandable to be nervous and anxious about moving away. That doesn't mean you won't be able to handle it though!
As you know, I moved abroad by myself when I was 16-18. It was such an adventure. I experienced the ups and downs of life. I met some amazing people and I met some arseholes.
Moving away at such a young age really gave me the independence that I needed. I was quiet and shy and it forced me out of my shell. You know what, I was probably too shy for everyone to want to put in the effort to get to know me, but the ones who did are the ones I talk to every day and are the ones I'll be inviting to my wedding whenever that may be.
I think you'll find that people will like you for you and once you find your friendship group then you won't even look back.
It's okay to have some reservations but don't pull out now. You've made so many amazing achievements to get to where you are today and I'm so proud of you.
If you're ever worried, write a letter to your past self and tell them all about why they should keep working to get to where you are now. You'll find that visualising how you got to where you are will really help ground you when you're feeling a bit shitty.
Keep going, you've got this. I believe in you
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