y

ellie2000

y dont ppl believe my side of the story about the cleaner

Past User

Hey @ellie2000

What are you referring to? Sorry if this is something you've mentioned before. I can imagine how hurtful it is to have others not believe you when you try to talk to them.

ellie2000

cleaner tht gives me drink to spend time with me, wen tht hpns i trust in opening up not to tell any1, i bought this up again coz its ongoing and he still comes here and we cant find no-one else.

ellie2000

shall i set up secret camera or......

Past User

If I understand correctly @ellie2000 that doesn't sound good at all. Are you able / have you tried to refuse the drinks? Has anything else happened that shouldn't have or that you didn't want? Sorry if this is difficult to talk about. Who is 'we' if you don't mind me asking?

ellie2000

me n mum, things fail, and ppl r d--k h--ds

ellie2000

i have tried to refuse, but he wont leave if i dont, ppl do my HEAD IN!!!! i need a rpg shoot a shoot haha

Former Member

Hi @ellie2000
Who is it exactly who doesn't believe you?
Whoever they are, I'm sorry they don't. This is something that is serious and needs to be understood and dealt with properly.

You also said you and your mum can't find another cleaner. Why is this?
Also is your mum around when it happens? Would he still do this if she was there too? I'm just thinking of ways to help you be safe around him, while you're trying to hopefully find a new cleaner.

It's been a few days since you posted on here. Are you okay? Has he come over since? How often does he come to your place?

ellie2000

she got it off a 'nextdoor fb' page even wen they didnt come we were paying them, why does itn take me to break down of someone to b concerned, or something serios to hpn 4 something to hpn?
as for 'am i ok' as if im totally mentally stable!!!

Former Member

I'm sorry that it's meant that this situation has had to develop and happen for it to get like this.
It doesn't sound very good if you were paying them even when they weren't coming.

Did you set up like a standing payment every week or something? I'm not sure if they're an independent cleaner, I don't know what the best way to deal with this is. Do they work for a company, or is it just them on their own? Would you not feel comfortable telling them that you're getting another cleaner, even if you aren't able to for the moment, to keep you safe?

ellie2000

i set up standing order, they're a indie cleaner, we still send them payment even wen they dont come round, 5 weeks in a row at one point. coz i think they just had a baby just to get out they current house

ellie2000

im scared wat ppl mite do if i say no

ellie2000

so i say yes n get in differacult situations

AislingDM

This sounds truly horrid for you @ellie2000 , not only to experience, but to not be believed or protected from this cleaner. You deserve to feel safe in your own home! It completely makes sense to say yes out of fear, so never feel bad about yourself because of this. Can I ask, have you been able to tell anyone other than your mum about this? (e.g., another adult that you trust) we are here for you Ellie

Former Member

Hi @ellie2000
I understand that that's something you've set up between the both of you, but if someone doesn't provide a service, you're well with your right not to pay them. Did you feel uncomfortable talking to them about this and asking for the money back since they didn't do anything? I figure it may be harder to sort since they're independent.

But the behaviour and way you've been treated by them is not okay in any way. I understand how you feel about saying no to people, and feeling like you need to say yes. It's completely understandable. Has your mum ever spoken to them and tried to get stuff sorted with them?

ellie2000

for now