Boys🖤

Former Member

Hi guys I’m going to be completely honest with you with what I think this might be trigger warning to some boys ⚠️ but to be honest I don’t think boys care about girls feelings and I think they like to take advantage of us and use us and I just think that is very hurtful.
For example if your with a girl you shouldn’t use her or take advantage of her you should love her and care for her. But unfortunately that isn’t the case for me boys just like taking advantage and using me but really I actually just want to be loved by someone who appreciates me and doesn’t use me and actually has time for me.
I just hate being messed around if you get what I’m saying I’m always in these kind of problems.
The thing with me is I fall in love easy most of the time
I’m just wondering do you think boys do that more at a young age or a old age are they less likely to cheat on you? Maybe the boys on here can answer that question?.
Thankyou for ready and again sorry boys if you are hurt by my post it’s just the way I feel you towards most boys now x

Former Member

Hi @_Tech_Addict_Girl

I’m sorry to hear how you are feeling right now, that your feelings haven’t been cared about and have been taken advantage of. It sounds like you have had bad experiences with males in your life. I think it’s natural that you would feel guarded or weary around males given the experiences you’ve had, but I wanted to first of all say that is not representative of the total population of males and it would be a shame for you to feel that way about all of them. There are plenty of wonderful males, including here on the boards who I hope will comment and support you too 💜

It’s very brave of you to reach out to talk about it, and to say that you just want love, appreciation and time - which is what any good relationship is built on!

Do you want to talk a little more about what’s happened in the past and what’s behind your question about cheating? Unfortunately I don’t think there’s any upper or lower age limit to cheating, it could probably happen at any age, but there are plenty of men who are morally better than that.

Sending hugs
Lucy

Former Member

@_Tech_Addict_Girl sorry about your bad experiences with guys

I'd say you shouldn't give up on an entire gender over what some have done, but I can understand that after a few bad experiences it can feel like nobody really cares about you, that's definitely not the case though and most guys are just looking for love in a relationship, the same as most girls.

With the idea of falling in love easily, I can relate to that. It's helpful to try not to get attached too quickly or try not too think about things too much in early stages, but I understand that's way easier said than done, if you preoccupy yourself with other things jt becomes easier though.

And yeah, I agree with Lucy about the cheating thing, people will do that at any age, it's a matter of how caring/selfish the person is and not their age

I hope in the future your experiences with boys are more positive

Former Member

@Lucy307 @Apollo Hi guys Thankyou for taking the time to reply to me I agree with both of you when you say all males aren’t the same but it’s like when you’ve been cheated on and broken too many times it just feels like every male will do that to me and then you feel very little trust in them yes Lucy about the thing behind the cheating I think I’ve been cheated on he was talking to another girl flirting with her while he was with me apparently he said to her I feel a connection with you do you want to date me.
I’m just curious about this because I feel like I actually won’t find live anymore I am 17 and I will be 18 December 2nd and I feel like I will have bad luck in the future when I get older.
I think partly of the reason is I online date and half of them just want hookups but like that’s all I can do to find love because my mom don’t like going out so I can’t go out because I’m in a wheelchair but that doesn’t stop me from going out by myself but she doesn’t drop me off places because she always says she has a busy day at work or she is tired x

Former Member

@_Tech_Addict_Girl you don't need to worry about "not being able to find love again" at 17 honestly. That's really young and you'll have plenty of chances to meet people at school, uni, college, work, that kinda thing.

I'm sorry about the fact that your mum won't let you out because you're in a wheelchair, I'm sure she's only trying to be protective but I think sometimes parents can forget how important going out is.

There's nothing wrong with online dating of course but you could maybe try waiting to see if you have feelings for someone that you'll meet in person. It'll be easier to tell what kind of person they are and they hopefully won't betray you like you have been before.

Former Member

@Apollo are you kind of saying I’ve done the wrong thing?

Former Member

@_Tech_Addict_Girl I don't think you've done anything wrong, what part are you referring to?

Former Member

@Apollo you just seem blunt about it

Former Member

Oh sorry, I didn't mean to come across like that

I kinda get what you mean though, sometimes I feel like I'm not great at expressing myself but no, I don't think you've done anything wrong and I hope you can find someone better than the boy who cheated on you cause you deserve better

Former Member

Hey tech addict girl , I’m sorry to hear about your experiences with guys and I think the way some men view and treat women is still undiscussed.

A boy will treat a girl like a piece of rubbish and just sever any sense of genuine emotion held by the girl , a gentlemen will always treat a woman with the respect and love they deserve. Gentlemen are rare but plenty exist , so whilst waiting for your gentlemen keep checking in with yourself and know you will never have your worth degraded by a boy and you have something they don’t - dignity !

I hope that made some sense , but from a guy - we aren’t all like that !

Ben

Azziman

Hey sorry to hear about your experience, really awful to hear! I think what you ask for is really reasonable - who doesn't want to feel loved and appreciated, right? In time, you'll find the right person that'll give you these things

Having said that, it's worrying to hear these kinds of generalisations. Both girls and guys are capable of this kind of behaviour, and most of both aren't how your describe, so it's important to take some perspective on this. I wouldn't extrapolate these experiences to a broad group like this - it can make us believe things that aren't true that affect our own expectations, behaviours etc, and that can cause hurt and problems. So while I understand why you're hurt, I think there's a better way to move forward from this x

Former Member

Thankyou guys ❤️ @ben2607 @Azziman

Former Member

Hey

Just want to let you know that it is completely understandable that you would feel this way if you have had past experiences of boys treating you wrongly and I'm sorry for what you've been through

This is not representative of all boys and I'm sure one day you'll meet a boy who treats you the way you should be treated and will help you build your trust back again. Your feelings are completely valid but you can move forward and get past this tough time in your life. Everyone is capable of this type of negative behaviour but there are people out there who will treat you right.

I hope this helps you and that your experiences in the future are positive.

Former Member

I'm so sorry for you feeling this way. It is said that girls mature faster than boys so maybe just give it time and things will start to change.
I understand you posted this a while ago so how are you feeling about it all now?

Former Member

@Past User i agree.

hi @_Tech_Addict_Girl no offence to men/boys but i can agree, they took my teenage life away from me i got kidnapped and raped.
how are you feeling now my lovely? i am a message away feel free to message on my depression thread.
take care.
summer x

Former Member

@Past User I am so sorry that happened to you, I hope you are ok. I am thankful that you are able to share that, I understand that it may not always be easy.

Former Member

hi @Past User I am sorry that you had such a horrible thing happen to you. Must have been very hard to go through such an awful experience, but i am glad you are safer now and able to share yur experinece.
I hope that you are doing better now