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Can I get some insight?

Yam27Yam27 Posts: 12 Settling in
I am looking for advice on general relationships, how do I make people "stick".

You persons with good sized friend groups and a romantic partner, how? Even if you have that one person in your life, how did that relationship become so strong?

If you feelin like meeting someone new and possibly making a new friend, someone to proofread your essay or talk about anime or anything, my discord is Yam#4885. Or just message idk how this awesome website fully operates yet

yall have a beautiful day you sexy beasts thanks for reading
lovemimoonAislingDM

Comments

  • Yam27Yam27 Posts: 12 Settling in
    I gotta change my profile pic this sun guy is pretty cool but he ain't it haha
  • lovemimoonlovemimoon 🦋 Posts: 2,089 Boards Champion
    Hey @Yam27

    Relationships are complicated - People tend to bond over simple things. Some may be weird, some may be... questionable. But it's bonding regardless! When you talk about making people "stick" around, are we referring to befriending people and maintaining that level or strengthening the current relationships you have? Either way, here ya go:

    An Insight
    Common interests are a good way to bond with someone but there's only so much it can do - so let's expand it to mindsets, your values, your ambitions, your beliefs, etc.
    What kind of mindset do you and this person have? What are your goals? Your beliefs? Does it align with yours? Is it different? Does it clash? You don't have to have the same opinion about everything - sometimes difference goes a long way. As long as you find that middle ground between each other and build it from there, you'll be okay. <3


    Personality!
    What are you like? How would your friends and your family describe you? It helps looking back at your previous (or current) relationships and evaluate why that relationship has lasted or is currently going for so long.
    Opposites tend to attract to a certain extent - maybe you've met someone who's the complete opposite of you but somehow, they blend. An example - Cindy (an alias) and I are opposites of each other. She's an introvert, I'm an extrovert. Classic duo, right? But over the 4-5 years I've known her, we've learned a lot from each other. I changed my approach on certain things thanks to her contagious positivity, and she uses humour to push through bad times. <3

    ALSO. ALSO.
    Little things like checking up on them, sharing videos and images, discussing daily lives, introducing fun topics, sharing bad days makes a huge difference. <3
    AislingDM
  • Yam27Yam27 Posts: 12 Settling in

    I release my hope of having any meaningful relationships in my life that sounds like too much haha. Its on me, I got issues that have deep roots and are extremely tough to fix I don't think I got the energy to deal. Being a polite and generally good person has gotten me so damn far Imma believe being polite and good can get me anywhere.
  • lovemimoonlovemimoon 🦋 Posts: 2,089 Boards Champion
    I hear ya. :joy:
    Relationships are hella complicated, so I've settled with the people I have.
    Whatever issues you have, I hope you find the energy to deal with it someday. :joy:<3

    Being polite and a good person can get you anywhere, just as long as you meet the right people.
    Yam27
  • Mumucookie02Mumucookie02 Posts: 12 Settling in
    Heyyy! I really need to change my profile pic on this lol. As far as I can say, I've been in a loving relationship and I've been on the not so happy side of things. Taking both sides into perspective, what comes first is you and your life. When you work on yourself and find the things that fulfil you and make you happy, you attract lots of positive energy and people YOU want around you!
    lovemimoonYam27
  • AislingDMAislingDM Posts: 415 Moderator
    I love the advice on here guys <3 One thing I'd mention is that ideal friend group size differs so much from person to person. Like I know many people who love being social butterflies and constantly remain in contact with most of their friends which is wonderful :) But, this is not how I operate and I think it took me a long time to become okay with this. So I try to focus my energy on the few people who really matter to me and even this can be tough. The fact that you're open to making friends is already pretty amazing tbh @Yam27 !!! and as has already been said, some people you click with and others you don't and that can be distressing at first as well but you deserve to have friends/loved ones who you get on with - like people you can feel comfy in a silence with =)
    lovemimoonYam27
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