Anti Bullying Week - How to stop bullying others

Emma_

Happy Friday  

Yesterday, we posted a thread for sharing experiences of bullying someone. Today, we want to focus on how you might be able to turn that behaviour around and get support if you need it.

Ditch The Label have some great tips for stopping bullying others:

1. You are not a bully

First and foremost, stop labeling yourself as a bully. It isn’t productive and will not benefit you. You may be bullying another person but that does not mean you are a bully. It is a behaviour and not your identity.

2. Understand why

Our research shows that there are a variety of reasons why people bully others. Bullying is a learned behaviour and is often used as a coping mechanism for a stressful situation. Common examples could include being bullied by somebody else, abuse, a traumatic situation or a stressful home life. In addition, we also know that some people bully others because they may feel competitive towards them or they may not fully understand an element about them. Once you are able to gain an understanding as to why you are motivated to bully others, this will give you hugely valuable insight.

3. Seek a resolve

Once you have identified the source of your behaviour, it is important to find a productive way in which you can resolve the situation. If you find this difficult, we would recommend speaking with an adult who you trust.

Alternatively, you can contact us or give our friends at Childline a call on 0800 11 11. Believe us when we tell you that you are deserving of support.

4. Reprogram your stress

What is the one thing that we all have in common? Stress. We all feel it, but it’s important to recognise stress and deal with it accordingly. By that, we mean – don’t store it up and let it fester, as it can have significant impacts on your mood and health. Give our Stress Reprogramming system a try.

5. Speak about it

You’d be surprised at how powerful it can be to just sit down with somebody who you trust and talk about everything that is bothering you. A problem shared, really can be a problem halved. It may be worth buddying up and going through our Stress Reprogramming exercise with somebody who you trust.

6. Is it a good strategy?

Pulling somebody else down will never, ever take you any higher. Using bullying as a coping mechanism for something stressful in your life is only going to make things worse; not just for you but also for the person who is at the receiving end of the bullying!

7. Understand the impact

To you, it may not seem serious, but to another person, the impact could be significant. For every 10 people who are bullied, 3 of them will self-harm, 1 will go on to have a failed suicide attempt and 1 will develop an eating disorder. Additionally, we know that people who have been bullied, on average, achieve lower grades and therefore the bullying could reduce their future career prospects.

Above everything, we would encourage you to please speak to somebody and seek the support available.

This could be a Ditch the Label Mentor who will offer non judgmental advice and support.

What would be your advice for helping someone stop bullying?

Maisy

This was good to read! 

I can't emphasise number 7 enough though, I know it's not necessarily the same, but growing up, I used to get into loads of fights with my brother. My dad would always say to me 'You wouldn't like it if that was done to you' after I had lashed out at my brother and I think it's good to keep in mind that the other person will suffer because of our actions. I also like the saying 'If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.' as ,generally, if you feel you can't yet trust yourself to act positively towards someone, then at least don't treat them negatively either. 

But it is important to realise that how we treat others is a reflection of things going on deep inside of us and it's good to try to understand this to prevent ourselves from bullying others. 

Thanks again for sharing this!